David Blaine and the New York Challenge

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david_blaine.jpgDavid Blaine is coming back to New York, with yet another death-defying traffic-stopping stunt that will captivate the city. After recently floating in a fishbowl for a week in the Lincoln Center, he now plans to spread the love to the Brooklyn Bridge, where he will hang 135 feet above the water for any number of days.

Sure it will look cool, but in all honestly nothing he’s done so far has been half as challenging as just living in New York. If his greatest feat is to keep calm and withstand long bouts of pressure and discomfort, we’ve got that in the bag. And unlike Blaine, after paying rent, we can’t afford to pay for an on-call physician. I mean if he’s going to be doing his stunts in New York, he might as well step up. After the jump, I challenge Blaine to survive any one of the following stunts we city folk attempt daily:
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CAPTION THIS: Soul Plane Patrol

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This picture of Taylor Hicks and Snoop Dogg performing together was taken last weekend at the Birmingham City Stages concert. Um, why why why why why? See more shots and some shakey, grainy video after the jump – and leave us your captions (or horrified reactions) in the comments:

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SIZZLER: K-Fed Likes Making Kids, Not So Much Helping Them

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kfedmiami.jpgAccording to this report in the NY Daily News, a few months ago Kevin Federline promised to “help a children’s charity on every stop of his promotional tour to support his upcoming CD”. According to his publicist (funny that he has one and Britney doesn’t):

“Every city he visits, he’s going to visit a charity that benefits children … whether that’s handing out toys to children at hospitals or whatever.” Lopez added: “He’s doing it now through August.”

Interesting, because last weekend while he was in Miami to play his crappy music at some crappy nightclub and drink Cristal champagne his pregnant wife probably paid for, Kevin found the time to party with his friends and take Britney and Sean Preston to the beach, but no time for children’s charity. So is Kevin’s word worth as little as he is, or are his deadbeat friends and knocked up wife his ideas of “charity”?

Boring New Angelina VS. Hot Old Angelina: You Decide

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angelina 7.jpgAngelina Jolie. Nowadays, when you think of Angelina you think of Brad, Africa, humanitarian work, and Africa (did I mention Africa?). But that hasn’t always been the case. A long, long time ago, way back in the 90′s, Angelina used to be Hot. Sexy. And freaky. And I miss that. Listen, I’m not taking anything away from her relief work, I’m just saying that I miss the old Angelina. The crazy Angelina. The vile of blood around her neck, Billy Bob limo f**king Angelina. THAT was the Angelina we all fell in love with. The new Angelina is just… well, it’s not the same.

So let’s play a game. Below you have two options, you can only pick one. You can either (A) watch the video preview of Angelina’s appearance on Anderson Cooper where she talks about being a Good Will Ambassador, or (B) click on Read The Rest Of This Entry to view 5 of the sexiest Angelina pictures I could find. A or B. The choice is yours. Which one are you gonna choose?
(A)

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YOUTUBULAR: 100 Awesome Music Videos

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The hipsters over at Pitchforkmedia took a break from being snarky and hating everything (except Band of Horses) and compiled 100 of the most Awesome music videos ever via YouTube. I don’t know what’s better: the fact that they put a ton of work into this, or that they used the word ‘Awesome’ unironically. I’m impressed by both.

Head on over there right now and waste the day away. Don’t miss the videos by A-Ha, Bone Thugs N Harmony, Cee-Lo, David Hasselhoff, Lionel Richie, Outkast, Pat Benetar, The Postal Service, Pulp, R. Kelly, Radiohead, Twisted Sister, and… ok, you know what, just watch them all. Which one is your favorite?

Counting Down The Days Till 2011

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rosie.gif A lot of times when I’m visiting The Huffington Post the headlines seem to all blur together. Bush/Cheney/Rumsfeld/Clooney, etc. etc. etc. But every once in a while, a headline captures your attention. A headline like…

“People Are Going To Be Having Sex With Robots Within Five Years”

I recommend you read the article. It’s incredibly well written and it poses some very interesting ethical questions. Of course, since I’m an idiot, the only question I ended up asking myself when I finished reading it was: If we are having sex with robots in five years, which robot would you want to have sex with? After some careful consideration, I decided to go with Rosie from The Jetsons (she was always so accomodating.) Or Optimus Prime. I guess I’ll know in 2011. How about you?

While You Were Watching Danza Reruns (sniff)

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  • James Blunt’s You’re Beautiful song brings a girl out of a coma. But for every one person he wakes, he puts another 500 in a coma.
  • Katie Couric’s absence from The Today Show hasn’t hurt its ratings. And it’s done wonders for the general vibe of the office.
  • Bruce Willis sues paparazzi who claims the star attacked him. And if a lawsuit doesn’t scare him, maybe this fist will.
  • Vince Vaughn invited parents to a nude sex shoot with Aniston. To help with the chemistry.
  • Jeremy Piven tells Cubs fans to “Hug it out, you little bitches.” Also says it to taxi driver, rabbi, talk show host, dog and anyone who doesn’t recognize him.
  • Pete Doherty fined for cocaine use. That should scare him straight.

Best Night Ever: Monday, June 19th

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It’s Best Night Ever for Monday, June 19th! Alex Blagg is here to walk you through the best of Monday night tv, including Wife Swap, Hell’s Kitchen, and How To Get The Guy!

…Of The Day

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  • JEW: Lindsay Lohan. After strapping a Chai around Lindsay’s neck, Madonna is one step closer to bringing her over to the kosher side. (Egotastic)
  • FAKE VARIETY AD: Forget about Cars, the movie that really cleaned up this weekend was Aquaman. (Celebutaint)
  • USEFUL SKILL: Gorillamask sent us over to this… a dude who can remove all of his clothes in under 10 seconds. (Doubleviking)
  • EXCITING BORING COUPLE: Jim Carey and Jenny McCarthy! Do you think they just sit around and talk about how much they miss the 90′s together? (WWTDD)
  • THE NEXT WAR ON TERROR: Brace yourselves, people, for The War On Fluff. (The Boston Globe via Waxy)