Having picked the gossip bone clean, the media’s first feeding frenzy of Mel Mania is finally over, meaning we can now enjoy the more introspective second course of coverage in which we turn our attention from the three ring circus of the scandal itself to the comical sideshow players surrounding it (or in this case, reporting on it). Nobody is more amused by this smorgasbord of sensationalism than Jon Stewart and The Daily Show, who take this hilarious look at what happens when news programs have a very big story, but very little video footage to support it.
The folks over at Defamer discovered the MySpace page for the upcoming Oliver Stone move World Trade Center. Sure, some might consider this to be in poor taste, but honestly with all those horrible emo bands out there this isn’t even the most offensive thing I’ve seen on MySpace today.
Currently the WTC only has 133 friends, which is kind of shocking; I could’ve sworn that 9/11 was more popular than that. Right now the best comment on the page is courtesy of a lovely young woman named mmmBUTTER, who states “thys movie l0oks pimp. ima definitely see it!!” Expect to see that quote in Variety real soon.
So add WTC today! I always knew there was some sort of connection between Tom and September 11th.
Message to Jews: Buckle up for the best Yom Kippur ever. Never will the taste of your own dry saliva seem sweeter than when Mel Gibson is delivering the keynote address at your temple. Los Angeles Rabbi David Baron had the foreskin to invite Gibson to speak at his synagogue on Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement. The L.A. Temple of the Arts boasts the largest number of Yids in the entertainment industry (making it also the headquarters for at least half-a-million conspiracy theories), and would be the ideal Semitic Debutante’s Ball for Gibson to “come out” at. What makes the invitation so appealing are the possibilities… Gibson, tanked on Manischevitz and gefilte fish, cracking his awkward opening joke — “Boy, is it just me, or is it an oven in here?” — following that up with some delightful Lethal Weapon-esque stigmata comparison, and capping it off with a heartfelt apology, given while running his hands over the head of the Rabbi’s wife checking for… lice. He’s like your crazy, racist, Malibu-owning Uncle you love to hate. I’ve already cleaned my fridge and reserved my ticket in anticipation. (Image courtesy of the Mel Gibstein t-shirt.)
Take a look at today’s round of “Celebrity Math.” It’s A Beautiful Mind-style doozy.
It’s Best Night Ever for Tuesday, August 1st! Michael is here to walk you through the best of Tuesday night tv, including Rockstar, Last Comic Standing, and The Real World!
While Mel Gibson may be schooling us in scandal, don’t you dare, for a second, believe that this is the lowest point of his career. In fact, the worst thing to happen to Mel Gibson’s career is the following PSA made in 2003. Why the worst? Check out Gibson’s co-star… Oh and if you listen reaaally closely, he definitely says some junk about Jews. (“I stopped Jew.” “I stopped JEW.” It’s there.)
Mel Mania continues here at BWE (“All Mel, All the Time, Until Lohan Messes Up Again”) with the release of this photo, taken at Moonshadows bar in Malibu, depicting a very Mad Max cavorting with a couple of god-fearing Aryan princesses only hours before getting arrested while delivering his impromptu address on sweetened breasts, the true ownership of Malibu, and Judaism’s destructive effects on world peace. In the comments, help us guess what these girls said to get Mel so riled up about religion.
Let’s face it: Morticians get a pretty bad wrap. Only after HBO’s Six Feet Under did we choose to accept morticians as the sexy, well-dressed, formaldehyde-scented guys they really are. Well, one clever funeral director in California is making even our darkest fantasies a reality, with his 2007 Men of Mortuaries calendar. Yes, this is serious. The money goes to benefit breast cancer patients, which is pretty awesome, however the psyched expressions on their strong-jawed faces is more than a little off-putting. But hey… it’s better than this “What Cats Teach Us” calendar (which, for the record, is that you are really and truly alone.)