- HEF’S FAVORITE GAME: Guess the number of STD’s Between Them. I’m going with 19. (D-Listed)
- SORRY CHARLIE: Cameron Diaz gets her ass dumped. Hollywood actors terrified as to who will have to date her next. (IDLYITW)
- SEXY FACIAL FEATURE: The crazy eye! (Cityrag)
- FUG OFF: Jessica Simpson vs. Brittany Murphy. Who you got??? (The Velvet Hot Tub)
- TIMESAVER: Why waste your time with the new Superman movie when you can see the whole thing in 30 seconds? (Popoholic)
- Britney tries on new look to avoid paparazzi. Bares an uncanny resemblance to a famous person in wig disguise.
- Dennis Leary’s fireman show Rescue Me offends viewers with a graphic rape. Luckily all five of them still promise to tune in next week if they can find FX again.
- Nicky Hilton may be pregnant . Hopefully this kid won’t force her to put her line of Tweety Bird purses on the backburner.
- Paris Hilton lands her helicopter on German farm so she can use their bathroom. But antics aren’t so adorable without Simple Life camera crew.
- Futurama is making a comeback in 2008 It’s going to be the year of Peggy Seagal, I just know it.
- Comedian Ze Frank is such hot sh*t right now he can pretty much conquer the world. With the help of two pieces of white bread and some Miracle Whip.
According to blogger and sometimes musical genius Thom Yorke, his band Radiohead had a very special guest at last week’s second sold-out show here in New York City. Despite the fact that tickets were so hard to come by that many of the band’s biggest fans (ahem) were unable to attend despite their tireless efforts, one of the lucky ticket-holders happened to be none other than President Bush’s daughter! Thom doesn’t specify which of the twins showed up, but he seems to be both annoyed and amused by the brain-shattering irony of her presence. I imagine it must be a rather strange feeling to go to a sold-out rock concert and hear one of the world’s most popular bands sing a bunch of songs that are ostensibly about your father and how evil he is. And on a semi-related note, I wonder if Little Miss Bush was wearing one of these lovely “Karma Police” thongs at the show.
(thanks to Jen for the tip!)
- The Late Greats posted a “mixtape of songs that address both positive and negative images of both men and women.” So head over there now for BEP’s “My Humps”, AC/DC’s “Big Balls” and everything in between.
- Plan on protesting any time soon? Kwaya Na Kisser has a TON of protest songs up today. So if you want to protest, America, meat, censorship, etc, hit them up. Dylan, Springsteen, Morrissey and a bunch of other artists will be proud.
- MyselfMyself posted a brand new live acoustic Beck track from Bonnaroo. It’s a medley of Do You Realize/Creep/Debra, and it’s pretty damn cool.
- A Spacious Hole In The Ground put together their weekly 6 pack today, featuring songs by Wolfmother, The Toadies, Starsailor and more.
- And finally, IndieChristoph has some really cool remixes today. Go download the remix of Sia’s “Breathe Me” ASAP.
I could’ve sworn we were done with these. I thought every Brokeback joke one could make has been made. Well, I was wrong. Today, Passions finally hopped on the Brokeback bandwagon– a wagon that was brought into the shop and broken down for parts months ago. But if any show on TV could take an old joke like a Brokeback parody and bring it back from the dead, it’s Passions. Enjoy.
Remember when Taylor Hicks won on American Idol and David Hasselhoff got more than a little misty-eyed? Star Jones does. On today’s episode of The View, Hasselhoff answered Star’s question as to why he was brought to tears that night. The reason he gave no doubt made her wish she never asked. Nice one, Star.
Rivers married girlfriend Kyoko Ito over the weekend in Malibu. According to their official website, a mini-reunion took place with past and present members of the band (except for that Mikey guy from the Green Album who disappeared after going crazy or something.) I’m not sure what they chose for a wedding song, but I’m hoping it was “El Scorcho.”
In other Bands I Used To Like But Now I’m Kind Of Embarrassed By news, Everclear is shooting for relevancy by dedicating their new song “Hater” to “Jerry Falwell, Pat Robertson and all others who hate in the name of Jesus.” They even created a MySpace profile for the video’s main character. You can watch “Hater” here (totally NSFW, by the way) Interesting idea. I wonder why they never made a page for their Volvo Driving Soccer Mom.
If you’re planning to cancel your AOL account, be prepared to make a strong argument, have a day set aside and parental figure at the ready. Some poor customer called up the customer service line to cancel his subscription and didn’t know he’d have to first get past AOL Rep ‘John,’ the gatekeeper of accounts. John wasn’t so sure this customer was responsible enough to make decisions on his own and spent 1/2 hour trying to change his mind (for his own good mind you.) He even asked to speak to the customer’s dad, because clearly this guy is insane to not want an AOL account. Props to Anna00 for dropping this viable argument for phasing out humans in jobs that computers could probably do better.
And if you’ve got a story for us, Drop it here.
TMZ is reporting that Halle Berry, who has – despite her unbelievable hotness – thus far been unable to keep a decent man around, is getting serious with the Canadian model seen in the picture below. I’m not sure what it is, but something seems disturbingly familiar about her new beau…
Now that his latest “Marlon Wayans pretends to be a girl/midget/caucasian” wacky-mix-up masterpiece Little Man is complete and ready to hit theaters, director Keenan Ivory Wayans is preparing the next project into which he’ll pour his legendary comedic genius. I know you’re rolling your eyes and thinking, “Let me guess – Marlon plays a wise-cracking albino parakeet in a ghetto petting zoo after his brother Shawn schemes up a silly plan to get rich on the world’s only stand-up comedian bird?” Good guess, but the Wayans Family Patriarch’s next project actually happens to be a timely big-screen adaptation of the Homey the Clown character from his 13 year-old sketch show, In Living Color. You really have your fingers on the pulse of pop culture when you understand America’s pressing need to once again enjoy Damon Wayans hitting children with a sock and saying “Homey don’t play that!” over and over again. Not only am I thrilled about this movie, I also can’t wait to see his future projects – a “meet the parents” adaptation of Roc next year in which a Wayans Brother tries to marry Charles S. Dutton’s daughter, then Keenan’s long-awaited Tyrone Biggums movie with Dave Chappelle for the reclusive comic’s triumphant comeback in 2018 (or a Wayans Brother playing the crackhead if Dave’s still crazy then).