- LOADED WEAPON: Rush Limbaugh’s penis. Please make sure it remains on land at all costs. (D-Listed)
- UNFORTUNATE TRANSFORMATION: Hilary Duff is turning into her sister Haylie. Unlike Ashlee turning into Jessica, this is not a good thing. (Hollywood Rag)
- SERIOUS QUOTE: “You almost got to be a homosexual to be recognized in the entertainment industry anymore.” - Jerry Falwell. Of course, the only way he was able to get that quote printed was by later announcing he was dating Andy Dick. (Media Matters)
- ANOTHER REASON TO HATE “BEAUTIFUL”: Now James Blunt is hooking up with Petra Nemcova. Man, I wish I saved all the crappy poems I wrote when I was in the 7th grade and turned them into radio singles… I had no idea they worked. (The Bastardly)
- DISAPPOINTMENT: Ashlee Simpson turned down a $4 million offer to pose nude in Playboy. Thank God. If she got naked I don’t think we’d be able to take her seriously as an artist anymore. (TMZ)
- Today I booked my flight for my buddy’s bachelor party in Montreal. Also today, The Yellow Stereo posted some rarities and b-sides by Of Montreal. Creeeeeepy.
- DoCopenhagen has a great mixtape today, featuring bands like Editors, Shout Out Louds, The Streets and more. What are you waiting for? Make it happen.
- Voxtrot is playing a free show with TV On The Radio in Brooklyn this Friday night. They’re also covering Blondie and the Talking Heads over at Young Poisoner’s Handbook
- Head over to Recidivism to hear a bunch of white dudes (System Of A Down) team up with the Wu-Tang Clan for a crazy version of “Shame On A Ni**a.” Is that allowed? I’m not sure about this one…
- And finally, if you’re not yet familiar with The Pipettes, you should be. Start off by going to Turtle Cove and listen to “One Night Stand.”
In the barren wasteland of daytime television, there is a sparkling oasis of awesomeness known as the “confronting your fears” segments on the Maury Povich Show. In these priceless displays, Maury brings on guests with unusual fears, then forces them to tearfully confront said fear as the audience looks on in sadistic glee. The results are funnier than watching Maury’s wife Connie Chung croon her way through old Sinatra tunes. In this classic example, a young girl is forced to look at and touch pickles, of which she inexplicably has a paralyzing fear:
Didn’t get a chance to catch Click over the weekend? Don’t worry. If it’s anything like the rest of Adam Sandler’s movies, we have a feeling it goes a little something… like this:
Don’t let the title of this game fool you– it has very little to do with dancing and a lot to do with beating the ever-loving s**t out of Kevin Federline in front of his pregnant baby-holding wife and douchey onlookers. Now doesn’t that sound like a whole lot more fun?
As the bouncer of the new and popular night spot Club Douche, your mission is to keep your eyes peeled for Mr. Federline – as he’s guaranteed to stop by and start trouble.
You can play by clicking here. Or you can just hunt down K-Fed and play in person. Whichever you’d prefer.
I have 3 questions about tonight’s Tuesday night lineup: (1) After Fear Factor: Reality Stars finishes up, where does Trishelle go next? She’s officially run out of shows! Is she going to just start showing up in studio audiences to get on camera? I can’t wait to find out. (2) Is Denis Leary forcing himself on his ex-wife in Rescue Me a better or worse career decision than starring in The Ref? And (3) Has everybody given up on The Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency? That show has about as much buzz as Pepper Dennis… which is also on tonight! What are the odds?
Well, I know what I’m watching tonight: My Super Sweet 16 on MTV (because it never disappoints) and Last Comic Standing. What about you? What are YOU watching? Vote now!
If you didn’t catch this morning’s two minutes of faux affection and genuine awkwardness as Star Jones formally announced her long forseen departure from The View, here’s the clip so that you can more closely examine the nuances of her co-hosts’ Oscar-worthy portrayals of supportive friendship, and then lament the fact that you’ll never get to see Star and future host Rosie O’Donnell angrily try to eat each other to death.
If you like the Editors and you like free stuff, today’s your lucky day. We here at BWE are going to give away a bunch of Editors merchandise, including a copy of their album The Back Room on CD and vinyl, a rarities CD, and a 7-inch single. You want it? Come and get it.
All you have to do to enter is send an email to firstname.lastname@example.org. Make sure you include your name and address so we know where to send your swag. We’ll pick a winner at random by the end of the day. Winner chosen! Thanks for entering.
After you submit your entry, you can watch their video for “Munich” right here. Good luck!
Just because Axl Rose’s abilities as a performer aren’t anywhere near what they were 15 years ago doesn’t mean his childish off-stage hijinx aren’t right back to their prime. First he got into a slap-fight with an aging, effeminate fashion designer during some movie star’s birthday party. Pretty hardcore. Now the cornrowed rocker has gotten himself arrested in Sweden after starting a fight with a woman that resulted in a drunken bar brawl, then biting the leg of the security guard who tried to break the whole thing up. It may not be the 80s, it may not be setting the Sunset Strip on fire, and Axl may no longer be musically or culturally relevant, but you’ve at least got give the guy a B for effort.
Supermodel Naomi Campbell, who is appearing in court today to face charges of physically abusing a maid who lost a pair of her blue jeans, has been accused of yet another abuse incident, by another maid, over another pair of misplaced jeans. Are you listening, Home Cleaning Professionals? For your own well-being, please pay extremely close attention to the following advisory warning, because one day it could save your life:
Never, EVER, under any circumstances, misplace a pair of Naomi Campbell’s jeans.
Also, you must understand that this violent behavior is not Naomi’s fault – she has an abuse abuse problem. We all know that celebrity and addiction go hand in hand – Pete Doherty to drugs, Charlie Sheen to sex, Britney Spears to misery – and Naomi is no different: she wants to stop beating the help, but first she needs to get help for her problem (then not beat them).