POLL: Who’s Sexier- Jessica or Ashlee?

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jessica ashlee.jpgEverybody’s favorite little sister, Ashlee Simpson, thinks she’s sexier than big-sis Jess.

“I’m taller than she is and my legs are longer than hers. I got lucky because my chest size isn’t completely massive.”

Now, she was joking around when she said it, but it still raises the question: Who do YOU think is sexier? Jess “The Chest” Simpson or Long Legged Ashlee. Vote now!

Cindy Margol-is-Desperate

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cindy margoli.jpgIsn’t it great that Cindy Margolis is back? And desperate.

After taking an 8 year break from relevancy (and we’re using the word “relevancy” verrrrry loosely here), Cindy seems to be everywhere these days. She starred in an episode of Celebrity Cooking Showdown (before it was yanked from the NBC lineup due to atrocious ratings), she’s supporting Team Nick (arguably the second most popular team in the Nick/Jessica division), and after all these years she has FINALLY agreed to do Playboy. Which is great. Beause after a decade of looking at pictures of Cindy wearing bikinis where we could see 9/10ths of her rack, it’s about time we get some closure. Those nipples better be made out of diamonds, that’s all I’m saying.

But anyway, we should all be thankful that Cindy is posing for Playboy in 2006… and that she didn’t do it back in 1986. Thank God for plastic surgery.

Borat Is Out-Kazakh-standing

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boratstill02.jpgIt’s starting to seem like Borat, probably the funniest of the many alter-egos of Sacha Baron Cohen, is turning up everywhere. Last week the President of Kazakhstan’s daughter spoke out in defense of the satirical comedian, insisting that the people of Kazakhstan (the country from which Borat claims to hail) should embrace the character’s humorous antics, as opposed to being offended by them.

Today, the forthcoming Borat movie got a glowing early review over at Ain’t It Cool News, who claims “it’s a comedy classic that people will still be showing their friends in 20 years”.

If you’re still not a Borat Believer, do yourself a favor and head over to YouTube to check out a whole bunch of his hilarious clips.

IN CASE YOU MISSED IT: Tom’s Nike Commercial

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There are lots of conspiracy theories surrounding Tom Cruise and this video by curiousfury proves what we’ve thought about Tom all along: Tom’s getting kickbacks from Nike. Check out this spoof of Nike’s marathon commericials using footage from Tom’s movies. It’ll make you want to buy whatever sneakers Tom’s wearing (without the lifts)
(via Ad Rants)

Sean Preston Spears-Federline Speaks!

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seanprestondriving.jpgCRACKED Magazine has nabbed the world’s first interview with young Sean Preson Spears, getting the dirt on exactly what life is like growing up with the scariest parents since The Addams Family. And if that’s not enough TMI for you, you can hear the Spears offspring’s very first words over at my MySpace page (yes, shameless self-promotion – but it’s relevant!)

Also, I think it’s funny that the kid’s initials are one letter away from spelling “SOS”.

LISTEN UP: BWE’s Daily Dose of the Best Music Ever

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  • MyExBestFriend is my new best friend for posting far and away the best mp3 update I’ve ever seen. Styx, REO Speedwagon, MJ, Bay City Rollers, Rod Stewart… the list goes on and on. This is why the internet was invented.
  • There’s something you need to know: If somebody posts a song from The Karate Kid II soundtrack, I’m going to link it. Latitude 44.2N has the Peter Cetera masterpiece “Glory of Love.” Download it, then name it something else so nobody discovers you have it on your iPod.
  • Quick, let’s move onto good music. Like the Spoon rarities and B-Sides over at Captain’s Dead.
  • Or how about the 14 live Ryan Adams tracks that I Am Fuel, You Are Friends has up. You can never have enough Ryan Adams, right?… Right?
  • And finally, Dreams of Horses has a track by Pony Up! which may just have the best song title ever: “The Truth About Cats and Dogs (Is That They Die).” Sorry Uma, it’s true.

Brangelina’s Mystery Woman

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bp042506_02.jpgYesterday, we were so enamoured of the Hello! pictures of Angelina, Brad and the brood, looking all family-oriented in the Nambian desert, we neglected to mention something rather odd.

Who is this woman in the picture? Why does she seem resistant to Zahara’s potent cuteness? And why was she invited to be in this staged family photoshoot? Is she one of those nannies who are “like family” ? Or in addition to their Cambodian and African children, did the couple adopt a bored, white 19-year-old American ? I think that would make them true humanitarians.

Check out more pictures of the Brangelina clan here.

While You Were Getting Over Your Post-Blogdom Depression

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  • LOST star and convicted drunk driver Michelle Rodriguez has chosen to spend 5 days in jail instead of doing 240 hours of community service. But don’t worry – all those less fortunate people she could have helped still got served.
  • Nick Lachey falls victim to the old Rolling Stone cover “bait and switch”, instead landing on the front of Us Weekly, where he rightfully belongs. Just like they say: there’s a publicity-starved sucker born every minute.
  • Tom Cruise admitted to hitching rides with prostitutes and their johns across the Holland Tunnel back in his younger, poorer days. But he swears he only provided “fluffing” services when he was REALLY broke.
  • When not throwing stones at other Hollywood “Stupid Girls”, singer Pink enjoys throwing back drinks in her glass house, Hollywood’s “Dragonfly” nightclub.
  • President Bush has chosen Fox News’ “fair and balanced” Tony Snow as his new press secretary. Apparently Bill O’Reilly was just a little too liberal.

SIZZLER: J.Lo Sued!

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home_south_beach170.jpgA television writer has filed a lawsuit against J.Lo saying the star stole his idea for a series called “South Beach Miami” based on his move from Brooklyn to Miami and his involvement in modeling. Meanwhile UPN’s Web site says “South Beach” is about 2 best friends, who “abandon their world as they know it and head to the alluring paradise of sandy beaches, beautiful people and hot spots in glamorous South Beach.”

Beautiful people in Miami? Sounds like the real victim here is the very similar series 8th and Ocean. And the ugly people of Miami who never get to be on TV.

IN CASE YOU MISSED IT: Jim Belushi Eats It

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belushi1.jpgSaturday night’s grand opening of Randy Gerber’s new nightclub Cherry in Vegas was one crazy party. With A-listers like Lisa Rinna, Peter Horton and Kenny G it didn’t take much time before everyone was getting jiggy with it. But nobody got jiggier than Jim Belushi!

Watch what happens when he climbs on a baquette and sandwich dances with Lisa Rinna. While it may look like he takes a fall, it’s just another one of his crazy dance moves.