- JEW: Lindsay Lohan. After strapping a Chai around Lindsay’s neck, Madonna is one step closer to bringing her over to the kosher side. (Egotastic)
- FAKE VARIETY AD: Forget about Cars, the movie that really cleaned up this weekend was Aquaman. (Celebutaint)
- USEFUL SKILL: Gorillamask sent us over to this… a dude who can remove all of his clothes in under 10 seconds. (Doubleviking)
- EXCITING BORING COUPLE: Jim Carey and Jenny McCarthy! Do you think they just sit around and talk about how much they miss the 90′s together? (WWTDD)
- THE NEXT WAR ON TERROR: Brace yourselves, people, for The War On Fluff. (The Boston Globe via Waxy)
Sure Joel Madden’s got the sleeves of tattoos and a brother with droopy eye makeup. And yes he’s got a tricked-out mack truck with 50-inch rims and a couple of 10-pound diamond studded pendants and a pit bull and two lip piercings oh, and a wristband with a skull on it. But when it comes down to it, the Good Charlotte singer has a lot more in common with one of the pre-pubescent, straight-to-video, squeaky clean Olsen Twins circa 1996 (and Ashley at that). Here’s why:
The following picture was taken outside of last weekend’s Bonnaroo Music Festival in Manchester, Tennessee. If you missed the fun, check out the recaps available here, here and lots of other places, then leave a caption for this picture in the comments section!
When I was 3-years-old I’m pretty sure the theme of my birthday party was GI Joe. That sounds about right. Well, when Henry Schally turned 3, he went in a different direction– a dorky, dorky direction. Henry happens to be a huge fan of NewsHour with Jim Lehrer on PBS, so his parents threw him a NewsHour themed party. Check out this video dropped by Vandar02. It’ll make you want to start beating the kid now to help him get accustomed to the inevitable beatings he’ll receive in high school.
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Anyone who’s ever stood at a Baskin-Robbins counter and agonized over which of their delicious ice cream flavors to select knows exactly what Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt are feeling right now as they ponder what race of baby they should next adopt to “balance out” their growing family of assorted children. Their current inventory consists of an Ethiopian, a Cambodian, and a Celebritarian – so let’s take a look at some of their future options and see if we can’t help them select the perfect flavor of baby for them to scoop up:
- Paul McCartney turned 64 over the weekend. What better way to celebrate than to head over to BadmintonStamps and download John Lennon’s “Oh Yoko.” I’m not sure why, but it seems like the right thing to do.
- Bookmark The Runout Groove. They’ll be posting their list of the best Rock/Music related movies of all time and including mp3′s in the process. Today they tackled Head and posted 3 tracks by The Monkees. Go download them unironically.
- The DIY Rockstar is guaranteed to always have a track worth downloading. Today it’s Jenny Lewis’ “Born Secular.” Or “Don’t Worry, Be Happy.” I guess it depends.
- Music Is Not Dead posted thier Top 10 tracks of 2006, each one equipped with an mp3. So head over there for tracks by Midlake, Pearl Jam, Beirut, and more.
- And finally, The Daily Growl welcomes the return of Sleepy Jackson. Because somebody has to.
Looking for the perfect place to throw a bachelorette party? If Chippendales is booked, you may want to book a trip to Switzerland. According to their new tourism campaign, a new breed of shirtless Swiss men who aim to please have been bred just in time for the World Cup. The country is pimping out the male half of their population in order to get more female visitors during the soccer season. Check out this commercial on their website, which features all sorts of calendar guys milking udders, holding thick ropes and fondling rakes in an attempt to make you associate Switzerland with
penises hardworkers. The tagline promises that Swiss men will spend “less time on football and more time on you.” But does that mean they’re going to also spend less time blowing on horns and shouting Ricola? That may be too high a price to pay.
(via WOW report)
Now that he no longer has a smoking hot wife or successful music career to worry about, Nick Lachey is doing his part to make sure that date rapists smell good by starring in this ridiculous commercial for Axe Body Spray, which has built it’s entire brand around the mistaken belief that smelling like glorified air fresheners called “Mojo” will make women want to sleep with you:
1. As usual, Pixar picks our pockets – $31.1 million
2. It’s Jack Black. And he’s in tights. And he has a moustache and a funny Mexican accent. But dude, Napoleon Dynamite was sort of awesome before everyone ran the jokes into the ground. No? I mentioned the tights, right? Fine, we’ll just rent something then – $27.5 million
3. If only these tricked out rice rockets had been given a decent plot, hilarious celebrity voices and CGI animation instead of neon rims, turbo spoilers and Lil Bow Wow – $24.1 million
4. Last time Keanu and Sandra hooked up onscreen, it involved a maniacal plot to send a bus hurtling towards disaster. This was sort of like that, except less literally – $13.6 million
5. This just isn’t working out. It’s not you, it’s me. You know what, it actually is you – $9.5 million
Desperate single women, an angry d-head chef, and a couple of shows about cars– it must be Monday night.
If you missed How To Get The Guy last week, I recommend you set aside an hour tonight to get on board with the show. It’s… a trainwreck. I can’t think of any other way to describe it. The show features four single thirty-something women, each one undateable for a variety of reasons, and each one looking to find a decent man in San Francisco by any means necessary. Watching these women learn how to flirt, awkwardly approach men in bookstores, and attend speed-dating seminars leaves you uncomfortable and intrigued all at the same time. It’s truly bizarre. Watch it, and let me know what you think.
Besides HTGTG, I’ll be watching Hell’s Kitchen, The Real World / Road Rules Challenge, and Fast Inc. tonight (it’s a great show, and I don’t even like cars!) What are YOU watching tonight? Vote now!