While you were enjoying your day off, we were enjoying our day on:
- John Legend is "playing the sex angle up a little bit." JFK would approve.
- Lindsay Lohan snubbed Kimberly Stewart at a recent party. Jimmy Carter mediated, and all is well.
- Keira Knightley hates her boobs, just like Mary Todd Lincoln.
- Simon Cowell is a total liar, but Gerald Ford pardoned him.
- Brokeback Mountain won four BAFTAs (British Academy Film Awards) last night. George W. Bush said now he totally has to see it.
- Madonna pats herself on the back for doing something Eleanor Roosevelt could do with one hand tied behind her back.
Originally designed to promote his first film, Zach Braff now uses his Garden State blog to break off engagements. Check out his utter denial of reported engagement to Mandy Moore and his utter adoration for a guy named Joshua Radin.
Some kind soul over at the Gorillamask forum posted a list of some great Comedy Central Presents, featuring some of our favorite comedians.
I recommend watching Greg Giraldo, Zach Galifianakis, Brian Regan and Stella. And Dave Attell. And Patrice O’Neal. Ah, who am I kidding, they’re all good. Click here to watch them all. Who’s your favorite?
The kids of MTV’s Fat Camp are the talk of the town or at least of this blog. For those of you who haven’t yet caught the special, imagine Laguna Beach sprinkled with the Biggest Loser and sauteed in Wet Hot American Summer to create meal of high-calorie fun.
While there’s mysteriously no Fat Camp details on the MTV’s homepage, we’re providing a temporary outpost for all things Camp Pocono Trails. With our readers’ help we hunted down the amazing Myspace pages of Chelsea, Matt and (ladies’ choice) Petey. Note the Smirnoff bottles, the pop songs and the bikini clad models they splash all over their profiles. Judging from their pages, they’re ready to rock n’ roll as MTV stars, so lets help make them famous.
In honor of Presidents’ Day, here’s a highly ridiculous little animated short. It’s so money.
Update: Thanks for deleting our account, YouTube. You rock.
While you’re there, why not join our YouTube Group?
Supermodel Kate Moss will star in Brokeback Mountain director Ang Lee’s next movie as the female lover of Charlize Theron.
Here’s a guess as to how the pitch meeting for this movie went:
- Executive 1: So everyone loves this new gay movie thing. Who would have thought?!
- Executive 2: Yes we’ve got to get Ang Lee to direct another one
- Executive 1: But you know what would be even better? This may be crazy but– what if this time the gay people were two really hot girls?
- Executive 2: That’s so crazy it just might work.
Donald Trump says that Martha Stewart should "take responsibility" for the failure of The Apprentice. Well, as the old saying goes, when you point the finger, you have three fingers pointing back at you. With that in mind I decided to look back at Donald Trump’s history of accepting responsibility for his failures. Let’s see how he did:
Here are the top five films people paid their hard-earned money to see this week:
1. Hollywood’s Latest Attempt to Capitalize on the Popularity of "March of the Penguins" and Other Movies About Animals Overcoming Arctic Terrain – $19.85 million
2. Another Studio-Produced Wacky Spoof Movie Composed Entirely of the Cliched, Poorly Constructed Gags Found In Most Other Studio-Produced Movies Over the Past Couple of Years, Except This Time It’s Supposed To Be Funny Because, You Know, It’s a Wacky Spoof Movie – $18.9 million
3. Peter Sellers Continues Rolling In His Grave, Only This Week Steve Martin Is Down Two Notches at the Box Office – $16.5 million
4. George Is Still Curious. Moviegoers Clearly Are Not – $11.25 million
5. After Only One Week In Relase, This Unnecessary Sequel to an Unnecessary Sequel Is Rapidly Approaching It’s Final Destination: Forgotten Irrelevancy – $10.1 million