Raji, an East Indian convenience store owner,
conspires to fool people into thinking that he is a yokel from the old
country. In reality, he is as American as Lincoln. The
turban-and-accent routine is only to fool the public into thinking that
they’re silly and harmless. In reality, they have a much more sinister
Stay Fresh people.[watch now]
Steven Seagal personally defeats numerous plants from around the world, harnesses their power to concoct new energy drink.
Michael Moore follows Roger Ebert’s footsteps and starts the Pritikin Diet. DeFede spotted leafing through the brochure.
Bruce Willis signs on for psychological thriller "Perfect Stranger" Unsure if he will play Balki or Cousin Larry.
Crocodiles now come GPS enabled. I, for one, welcome our new Reptilian Overlords.
Ashlee Simpson’s Plans to Move to Ashgabat are Dashed to Pieces.
I think the google map craze has gone a little too far. I have to say I was shocked to learn that Hot or Not is still kicking around the web. Anyway, all you have to do is enter your zip-code and your sexual preferences and you’ll be shown a list of people to rate or blackmail in your area. Lets bring back the year 2000 folks![link]
Okay Brad Pitt, Jude Law and Johnny Depp I get. What I don’t get is how Benicio Del Toro and Robbie Williams make the top 10. I would just like to go on the record that…this s*** is b-a-n-a-n-a-s.[link]
I’d also like to think that if we aren’t following the rules of picking actual "hunks" for this list, I would like to submit a late candidate. This guy is so hot..[Video spoof may make you lose your appetite. For that I'm sorry.]
Sometimes you’ve got bigger problems than a
gun-weilding maniac. Like printing. (2:00)[link]
This video is a little goof on the IBM tech crisis commercials.
Link thanks to:
AP says "The 40 Year-Old Virgin" should have another hyphen between
"40" and "Year," proving that anal retentiveness doesn’t get you laid
Garth Brooks to sell his music exclusively through Wal-Mart, proving indeed, he does have friends in low places with low prices.
Olivia Newton-John finds she’s hopelessly devoted to a boyfriend that hasn’t returned from fishing trip. She better shape up!
Tom Sizemore now has online porn site; "Shaving Ryan’s Privates" not yet a feature. (link to article…not site. You’re welcome.)
Former Rider of Lohan defends Lindsay‘s hate for all things food.
Scarlett Johansson was involved in minor car accident outside Disneyland, not hurt due to cushioning of two fully-deployed airbags…*snicker*
Barbara Streisand, puts her plans for finding the Triangle of Xenthar on hold, debuts new song against the Iraq War.
Deadheads want Jerry Garcia on a postage stamp. USPS worried Deadheads won’t take stamps off their tongues.
"After his iPod was crushed to death in his pocket, jammed against the
handrail of one of those famously cramped Japanese commuter trains, one
enterprising guy has taken protecting his iPod to the extreme: a
veritable vault milled from solid aluminium."
No word yet on whether 50 cent has got his in the mail yet…but I think it’s just a matter of time.[link]
Hmm it seems Paris doesn’t like Paris as much as she thought she did. Shocking. I’m sure it will be as easy to replace as her pet bitch was… the dog, not Nicole.[link]
I can’t believe I am posting this…but the new Back Street Boys video is pretty damn funny. The boys do an ode to Heavy Metal Parking Lot. If they would have started making videos like this years ago, I wouldn’t have still played their videos on mute but I would have at least watched them. This is your must watch video of the day, even if you have to put it on mute too.[link]
Link thanks to:
R is for rocket. S is for space. B is for birthday. Happy 85th, Ray Bradbury.
Hawaiians revive lost sport of "lava sledding". Reports that Darwin has
purchase a plane ticket to the islands are apparently true.
Halle Berry’s ex-husband cheated on her to save their marriage. Yeah, good one Buster.
When responding to criticism of his owning seven houses, Sting replied, "I want to live as normally as possible". Back off people, it’s not like he owns 8 homes or something crazy like that.
Always ready to stretch her acting legs to characters she’s nothing
like, Janeane Garofalo will guest star as an annoying liberal media
strategist in "The West Wing".
Cow jailed in Columbia after police cite it udderly responsible for moooving too slowly and causing an car accident.