You know, writing day in and day out about all the dumb stuff that celebrities do can be a pretty daunting task. Sure, it’s easier to make snarky jokes about famous people who do foolish things, but sometimes I find myself wishing that just once I could report some news about a celeb who has actually done something right for a change. And lo and behold, while her peers are all out partying and prostituting themselves, young Mischa Barton has made the incredibly wise decision to use her post-OC hiatus to (imagine this) learn how to act! Even though being a famous actress these days only requires an eating disorder, a drinking problem, nymphomania and the willingness to be constantly photographed in public, Mischa is actually taking the time to learn the craft of her trade, which means that while Lohan is blowing Paul Walker while he races a tricked-out Honda through The Faster and Furiouser 4, Mischa could be enjoying the kind of success reserved only for the serious “indie” actresses of her generation – like getting to blow Vincent Gallo.
I’m not going to let it happen again. I’m not going to let myself miss another season of Project Runway while everybody obsesses over it and talks about it non-stop. The 3rd season kicks off tonight and I’ve vowed to get on board so I’m no longer left in the dark as my friends do Tim Gunn impressions and rattle off the names of designers like they were FIT students. This time I’m ready. Bring it on, Klum.
Also starting up tonight is the 8-part mini-series Nightmares & Dreamscapes based on stories by Stephen King (and starring the lovely Claire Forlani). Throw in a ton of reality shows (including The Hills and America’s Got Talent) and you’ve got another full night of TV. So what are YOU watching tonight? Vote now!
If you’ve been watching Entourage this season, you’ll remember that Vinnie Chase’s big superhero movie Aquaman opened up at $116 million, shattering the previous record set by Spider Man. You’ll also remember that Entourage is a fictional television show, and that in reality there has thus far been no film version of the Aquaman comic. Well, that is unless you’re CNBC’s Joe Kernan and you’re easily confused by gimmicky promo ads, in which case you’ll just report the fictional Aquaman box office results as fact on your news program:
If you live in New York, if you own an iPod, or if you’ve ever harbored a secret desire to ride the Cyclone drunk after scarfing down a couple of Nathan’s Hot Dogs, then odds are you’re going to be at the Village Voice Siren Festival this Saturday afternoon. With acts like The Scissor Sisters, The Stills, Art Brut, Priestess and Stars you’d be crazy not to go.
Well, if you’re not able to make it, don’t worry, we’re holding a contest so you can win some fun stuff from a couple of Siren bands. Send an email to
email@example.com by the end of the day and you’ll be automatically entered to win a signed Art Brut CD, some Art Brut singles, a signed copy of Priestess‘ “Hello Master” and we’ll even throw in a T-shirt from Tank Theory brand clothing. Not too shabby. So email us now. Make sure you include your address so we know where to send the swag. We’ll pick two lucky winners at random at the end of the day today. Good luck!
Winners chosen! Thanks to everyone who entered.
When I saw that dg dropped this Nintendo Zidane Game I got a little *too* excited. All I want is a fun flash soccer game where I can run around, kick a ball, and headbutt my opponents at will. Is that too much to ask for?
This little Nintendo animation is a tease. Yes, it’s cool to see the little bald 8-bit Zidane leap from the ground and headbutt another player in the chest, but it can only satisfy me for so long. Has anybody come across a real Zidane game? If so, Drop It now!
Well, after years of portraying winking teenyboppers, Lindsay Lohan appears to have finally found a role she can really sink her teeth into. These pictures were taken on the set of her latest film, Georgia Rule. Check out a few more after the jump – including one where she “washes it down” with a refreshing Diet Coke – then leave your captions in the comments!
Okay, let’s say you’re on an airplane – a commercial jetliner like the ones you’ve probably flown your entire life. And let’s just say that somehow, for some reason, someone elected to put a whole bunch of deadly snakes on this plane with you and said snakes managed to get loose, thereby posing a terrifying and lethal threat to you and your fellow passengers. And now let us imagine that Samuel L. Jackson also happens to be aboard this plane, and that he is the only passenger who can possibly save you from those motherf*cking snakes. And suppose all this hypothetical intrigue is being filmed for use in a summer Hollywood movie unsubtly titled, Snakes on a Plane. Well, if this were all to actually happen, the one thing you would really need is a corresponding music video from a band who just happens to be named after a deadly snake, as well as some sort of aircraft (say…Cobra Starship, for example). And the song in that video should probably be called, “Snakes on a Plane (Bring It)”. Oh, look…
- Tom Cruise’s spokesperson is begging the media to give Tom, Katie & “Suri” their privacy. Though the quotes around “Suri” are mine, not theirs.
- Jessica Simpson says her ideal man is Brad Pitt in the movie “Fight Club.” Which I think means that her ideal man would actually just be a figment of Ed Norton’s imagination. Deep.
- Jaime Pressly says Paris Hilton, Cindy Crawford and Elle MacPherson should all give up acting. Thank God we have legitimate actresses like Poison Ivy III‘s Jaime Pressly dictating who should do what in Hollywood.
- Paris Hilton doesn’t have many friends left because so many of them have betrayed her by selling stories to the media. Not because she’s a horrible, manipulative, unlikeable c**t. That has nothing to do with it– it’s their fault.
- The Orange County band Supernova has filed a complaint against Mark Burnett’s reality show Rock Star: Supernova. The band was absolutely stunned that somebody else was able to come up with such an original name.
It’s Best Night Ever for Tuesday, July 11th! Brian Faas is here to walk you through the best of Tuesday night tv, including Fear Factor, Last Comic Standing, and Rock Star: Supernova!
- CHER NEWS: Cher’s best friend Dionne posed naked for Playboy. FYI, I’m talking about the Clueless Cher, people, not the old scary one. (The Bastardly)
- FORCED RETIREMENT: Paris Hilton says she’s giving up sex for a year. The city of Los Angeles plans ceremony to raise her vagina to the rafters of the Staples Center in memorium. (Blog NYC)
- BO KNOWS: This video showcasing just how amazing Bo Jackson was in the game Tecmo Bowl brings back many memories. Man, I miss crappy video games. (Gorillamask)
- BEATING A DEAD HORSE: Well, not exactly. But soon. (Deadspin)
- WEBSITE FORMALLY KNOWN AS PRINCE: The Artist’s website is ‘on hiatus’ until further notice. Strange; it’s not like him to be so impulsive. (TMZ)