We’re waist deep in the summer movie season. We’ve had Super men and Pirates of the Caribbean and Adam Sandler clicking things. We’ve had Devils wearing Prada and we’ve had lots and lots of Cars. We’ve had a lot of big hits and a couple of big flops, and guess what: I haven’t seen any of them.
It’s true. I’ve yet to hit the multiplex this summer. I’m not proud of this, so I’ve vowed to go see a movie or three this weekend. But the question is, which ones should I go see? Should I rock out with You, Me and Dupree or walk out on Clerks II? I need help.
Which movies are YOU going to check out this weekend? Vote now.
It’s a rare day when we feel any kind of sympathy for a beautiful, A-list Hollywood star, but somehow, Uma Thurman has us sulking. First of all, we hear that the statuesque Uma is unhappy with her appearance, particularly with her ears, adding that her face looks like “two fish swimming” in between them. Now, if this was an observation we would have made, it would clearly be hilarious… but if she actually thinks that? Well, then it’s really kind of sad… Uma, you’re gorge!
Thurman is also struggling to find a new man after her last relationship with hunky hotel mogul Andres Balasz fizzled out. She blames her celebrity status on the lack of interested suitors, but we’re beginning to think it might have something to do with her bad attitude. So, if you know Uma, or are within 15 feet of the woman, make sure to shower her with non-stop, over-the-top praise. Some examples: “Uma, have I ever told you that your ears were molded by God himself?” or “Oom, it’s so funny, but I was just thinking how your face looks nothing like two fish swimming side by side.”
Unless this is a huge sympathy ploy to drive people to her new movie, My Super Ex-Girlfriend. In which case, don’t you dare pay that conniving woman a compliment.
As the Middle East continues blowing itself to bloody oblivion, the intrepid journalists over at TMZ brush past the carnage and devastation to focus on the truly important issues at hand – like which flack jacket-clad TV journalist is “the biggest hottie”. As we all secretly know but aren’t as bold as TMZ to admit, the explosions and chaos from the warzone in the background are really just an excuse for a bulletproof vest fashion show with primetime news tough guys Anderson Cooper and Richard Engel. This is why TMZ is utterly amazing – within a single blog post they’ve managed to boil the complexities of a decades-long international crisis down into something so simple as determining which reporter looks dreamiest in front of a nation’s total annihilation. God bless America, and God bless TMZ!
We gotta hand it to our friends over at TVGasm for catching this clip from early nineties movie Soapdish. If anyone was to have a show hotter and sandier than Laguna Beach, it would have to be Robert Downey, Jr.
Before he dawned the red and blue tights and set the gay’s hearts aflutter, Superman Returns star Brandon Routh used to kick it with the Lazy Sunday posse themselves, The Lonely Island. At around the half-way point of the clip below, the boy-who-would-be-Superman drops off some sweet flow as the moustachioed police officer Dino Wong. I’m not really sure what you’re supposed to think about this, but somehow it seems important that you see it.
(via A Socialite’s Life)
Bored at work? Hungover? Sick and tired of checking your MySpace profile over and over and over again? Looking for something to do?
Hey, me too!
If you need something to pass the time, head over to Sony’s Monster House site. They have a couple of games up that should keep you busy for a little while. I recommend the Mega Sweet Arcade Game because it’s just that: Mega Sweet.
And hey; it sure beats doing work.
Working in Hollywood is a lot like working on a farm in that nobody can keep their hands clean forever. Celebrity and scandal go hand in hand, and like a loss of virginity (sometimes less metaphorically than others), you never forget your very first time. Despite getting a little dirt on them, some celebs seem like they’ll manage to come out of their first scandals clean as a whistle (UPGRADE), while others you just know will end up dirtier than Brandon Davis’ mouth (DOWNGRADE). Tell us which of these stained stars will continue to shine, and which ones are going to burn out before we know it.
The reviews of Lady in the Water are in, and they are not good. So instead of spending $10 to sit through 2 hours of evangelical mumbo-jumbo, check out this hilarious and yet terrifying short video called “The Life and Death of a Pumpkin,” and spend the remaining hour and fifty-five minutes organizing an angry letter-writing campaign to M. Night Shame-he’s-lame.
Check out this picture taken of Ashlee Simpson in New York City yesterday. Something about it is kind of confusing. Let’s begin with her face. She looks good following her nose job and possible lip plumping, you have to admit that. Good tan, standard issue 45-pound sunglasses, fake hair likely ripped from the hands of cancer patients. What’s confusing is her t-shirt. Ashlee apparently never got the memo that girls just don’t do… scat — I mean that, sorry… “that”. Why spend thousands on a face transplant if you’re just going to have people picture it all squinched up on a toilet somewhere? You wouldn’t wear a shirt that said “I’m So Happy I Could Just Skin A Baby”, would you? We imagine Jessica Simpson is looking very upset right now — assuming she still has the ability to make facial expressions.