I’ll admit it. Since the advent of sites like Google, Technorati, Friendster, MySpace and Facebook, I have spent many wonderful hours utilizing the Internet to stalk ex-girlfriends, current girlfriends, people I want to be my girlfriend, people I went to school with and pretty much every other human being I’ve ever come into contact with.
But the old way of cyberstalking was just so demanding. I had to visit each of these search portals individually to see whether or not the girl who works down the hall has an online presence. It was almost more difficult than stalking people in real life. But not anymore! Thanks to the amazing Stalkerati, I can now search for people on all the aforementioned websites from a single handy website. My days of searching across the entire web for that girl who used to be my lab partner in 7th grade are long gone!
Thanks to The Onion, now we finally know why Axl’s taken so damn long to finish up Chinese Democracy. Surprisingly, “Living in fear of another Tommy Hilfiger attack” is not on the list. You can see the full infographic by clicking the thumbnail now.
It’s nice to know that Mario and Luigi have the same MySpace dilemmas as the rest of us. In the next installment, I hope they tackle the issue of when exactly you’re obligated to update your status to “in a relationship.”
Thanks to GeoffreyG for Dropping this. Now go ahead and Submit something of your own!
(Related: BWE’s own “thanks for the add” t-shirt in glorious blue.)
If his job as Sean Preston’s new male nanny doesn’t work out, there’s always a place for him at Hooters.
More pictures of Britney’s new moobalicious manny here.
What’s that? It’s not a photoshop? Tom Cruise is seriously the person Premiere Magazine chose as the “the most powerful actor in the world”? I suppose their criteria must have had more to do with his ability to consistently draw the ridicule of the media than it did with the fact that his latest bloated blockbuster explosion-fest hardly turned a stateside profit…
Paris Hilton recently told the press she has a new crush on Rod Stewart’s daughter Kimberly Stewart. She told Britain’s Top of the Pops magazine: “Kimberly is hysterical. She’s six feet tall, blonde, beautiful and has luscious blue eyes. She’s hot. I feel so comfortable with her and I can just act like myself.” Rumor has it, Paris hasn’t felt like this about anyone since she fell in love with her own reflection.
This is for all of you who have been dying for some answers about the true story of how Shiloh Nouvel Pitt-Jolie, Brangelina’s only begotten
son daughter, came into the world:
One day about
2000 years ago 9 months ago, an Angel of the Lord Agent of the CAA called Gabriel Ari told Mary Angelina Jolie she would have a very special baby that she should call Jesus Shiloh.
Mary Angelina married boned Joseph Brad Pitt and took him to Bethlehem Namibia so they could pay their taxes a self-affirming visit to poor people. Mary Angelina was expecting to have her baby very soon.
After a few rain in spains and a shower, My Fair K-Fed has cleaned himself up… for an Item Magazine Photoshoot. While this new look is only temporary and presumably ironic, we’re sure he’ll keep it up if enough people like and if he thinks it will earn him more money. (he’ll also tell you anything you want to know about Britney for a couple bucks extra)
So tell us, which Kevin Federline do you prefer? K-fed or Baron Von Kevin Federline III?
See more pictures of the new Kevin at US Weekly’s blog.