I’ve never been to Fire Island, but from what I hear it’s a fun place loaded with attractive people in their mid-twenties who hang out on the beach every day and get wasted and hook up with each other every night. Sounds like a perfect set-up for a reality show, right? One Ocean View premieres tonight on ABC, and I’m hoping it fills the Laguna Beach void in my life. (Casting the MySpace pin-up/ Playboy model to the left definitely helps, by the way.)
Tonight NBC drops the cleverly titled StarTomorrow (get it??) on us, and TNT has new episodes of The Closer and Saved. And oh yeah, it’s SHARK WEEK on the Discovery Channel. So what are YOU watching? Vote now!
Stephen Colbert. Comedian. Newsman. Vessel of Truthiness. Superhero? According to Marvel Comics, the answer is yes. Editor-in-chief of Marvel Joe Quesada presented Colbert with this comic book mock-up on his show Thursday night, with Colbert killing what he believes to be the biggest threat to our freedom as Americans… a big bear. You know, they should really give all Daily Show contributors their own comic books. Who doesn’t want to see Jon Stewart kick some political ass while in a head-to-toe body stocking? (Click thumbnail to enlarge… your heart.)
Friday night at 11pm Best Week Ever will air its 100th episode. For the past two and a half years we’ve said a lot of intentionally hilarious things about a lot of unintentionally hilarious celebrities. In honor of reaching this milestone, all this week we’re going to countdown our five favorite celebrities and remind you in 100 seconds why we love making fun of them. Today, we celebrate #5– Paris Hilton.
Who’s #4? Make sure you come back tomorrow to find out.
Listen up, it’s official: Singer James Blunt is the fourth most annoying thing ever, according to a British survey published today. Blunt’s #1 hit “You’re Beautiful” has already been banned from a number of British radio stations, following an unfortunate trend of bile shooting out of people’s earholes. According to the survey, Blunt is more annoying than “stepping in dog poo”, “heat rash” and “diahorrea”. While Blunt may be annoying, it’s fair to say that when faced with the quandry of listening to his lady-like vocals or having a horrible, sweat-inducing bout of the rhea, we’d choose Jamesy any day.
Check out the whole list after the jump, and note the quirky British slang of such items as “Somebody nicking your parking spot” (#34), and “Running out of loo roll” (#39). Also note #1. What are the odds that’s the only answer given by 90 percent of those surveyed before slamming the phone down?
It’s Best Night Ever for Sunday, July 30th! Pete and Brian are here to walk you through the best of Sunday night tv, including The Dog Whisper, Mind of Mencia, and Dirty Jobs!
The trusty dirt-diggers over at TMZ have just released an exclusive report claiming that Mel Gibson was arrested last night in LA on suspicion of Driving Under the Influence. While details are still sketchy, a spokesman for the Sherriff’s Department reported that Gibson was released this morning, but the investigation is still ongoing. It’s hard to dispute an official booking report, but a holy man such as Gibson surely can’t be guilty of the crimes of which he’s been accused. Sure, he might have been having a late-night communion at a nearby tavern, but he had no choice other than to continuously cleanse himself with the blood of christ to be absolved of his sinful lust for the cocktail waitress in the low-cut blouse. No matter what Johnny Law says, Catholicism is not a crime, and the LAPD shouldn’t be allowed to get away with this blatant religious persecution. After all, what would Jesus do? I think He’d turn the other cheek or, in this case, toss Mel his car keys and a bottle of scotch.
Message to Lindsay Lohan: We are on to you and your “heat exhaustion.” (Picture a giant making sarcasm quotes on that one.) So says James Robinson, CEO of Morgan Creek Productions, the company producing Lohan’s latest cinematic venturing Georgia Rule. In an official looking letter (complete with Times New Roman font and company letterhead), Robinson calls Lohan “discourteous”, “unprofessional”, and a “spoiled child”. (Click thumbnail to read.) But most importantly, he says what’s been on the world’s mind for days: Enough with the heat exhaustion b.s. already — STOP PARTYING. PUT. THE STRAW. DOWN. UNSEAL YOUR LIPS FROM YOUR GOLDEN FLASK. You are about to be fired, which is big people talk for you are about to lose a lot of money. Most importantly, they have video of you going down on some dude! And you wouldn’t want that to ruin your reputation, would you, babygirl?