History has shown us that nothing ruins art as quickly as commerce, but that was before celebrities came along. If things keep up like this, in 15 years the Metropolitan Museum of Art is going to look like Madame Tussaud’s.
As if the emotionally-scarring "Britney Spears Debuting Sean Preston To the World" statue wasn’t enough, now there’s the "Kate Moss Coke-Fueled Pre-Coital Vagina Presentation" sculpture you’re unable to stop looking at on your left.
Look, I know it’s tempting for you starving artists to throw together a "Lindsay Lohan Saturday Night Bathroom Break at Bungalow 8" sculpture to get some press and sell some work, but this trend seriously needs to end now before real damage is done and someone unviels their inevitable "Katie Holmes Gives Silent Birth While Tom Cruise Hovers Above Her Like Zool From Ghostbusters" Masterpiece.
I just don’t think my fragile psyche can handle that.
For those of you who’ve been unable to properly rest or relax since last week’s announcement of the big Katie Couric-Meredith Vieira-Today-The View switcheroo, fear not!
A quick glance at this video from Comedy Central and your misgivings will be quelled, as you realize that these two women are really just one in the same.
Life really does go on.
Shea had the Best Night Ever watching American Idol, Top Model, Lost and Black.White.
VIDEO: Carmen Electra’s now-infamous, possible contract-ending Sybian ride, in all its glory. (Here, via Gorillamask)
OFFER YOU PROBABLY CAN REFUSE: A 55-year-old Italian Pornstar has offered herself to Osama bin Laden in exchange for an end to his tyranny. (Adult Industry News)
DENIAL: Jennifer Love Hewitt throws a wrench into the Wilmer Valderrama sexual empire by saying she never slept with him. (Egotastic)
LIST THAT MAKES YOU FEEL INADEQUATE ABOUT YOUR LIFE: Money Magazine’s list of the Top 50 Jobs in America. ‘Blogger’ is nowhere in sight. (CNN Money)
NEWS STORY THAT HOPEFULLY DOESN’T INSPIRE A REALITY TV SHOW: While cameras rolled, three men in North Carolina castrated a willing patient. Next on FOX! (Court TV)
Brett Ratner, the undisputed holder of the title "Hollywood’s Hackiest Director", is like that guy in high school who, despite being a total jackass, always had the hottest girlfriend, the coolest car, the best scholarship, and all-around luck that would make the Irish weep into their whiskey.
Anyway, in the course of the past week or so, he’s got Jessica Simpson and Lindsay Lohan (who he might be dating) fighting over him, Ashton Kutcher punking Hugh Jackman at his house, the Malibu Film Festival honoring (!?!) him, and to top it all off, his longtime friend Robert Evans (above) has ‘stayed in the picture’ yet another week without croaking.
Sounds to me like a classic case of Best Week Ever.
According to Star, Black Eyed Peas singer Fergie is pregnant with Josh Duhamel’s baby. The tabloid claims she’s been pregnant for 8 weeks now and the couple are deciding on when to tie the knot.
Congrats Josh! Now you’ve got two kids to potty train.
Holy moly I can hardly contain my excitement right now! I just recieved word that this summer’s Mission:Impossible Magical Mytery Tour of Tom Cruise’s Insanity is making a stop right here in Manhattan. Just take a gander at THIS:
"While visiting New York for the May 3 screenings, Cruise is expected first to appear live at MTV’s Times Square studios for "TRL." Then he plans crisscross Manhattan by motorcycle, speedboat, taxi, helicopter, sports car and subway before landing at showings of the movie in Tribeca, Harlem and, ultimately, the Ziegfeld Theatre for the film festival premiere."
Do you have any idea what this means? Not only is Captain Thetan gonna be in the same zipcode as me, he’s gonna be in my company’s BUILDING! Probably on a MOTORCYCLE! Oh man, I wonder if I can get him to personally – personally - save me from drug addiction???
A public remark made by Tiger Woods in which he described a recent golf performance as "playing like a spaz" has been met with outrage, as many people are calling into question the appropriateness and sensitivity of using the term "spaz". Spaz Rights groups have risen up in fury over the offensiveness of the sports star’s casual put-down of their kind, and are now totally spazzing out about it. They are also demanding the immediate removal of the terms "stupid", "idiot", "moron" and "over-reacting jackass" from the English language.