TRAILER TALK with Ronnie Dwayne Munro

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Ronniedwaynemunro
How y’all doin’? I’m Ronnie Dwayne Munro, and I’m here to talk about the
one thing I know anything about: trailers. This week, we’re gonna be
lookin’ at the newest trailers available here on the World Wide
Internets.

Click – Oh man, ain’t this movie got it all?  Adam Sandler, 80′s songs, the guy from Baywatch, a story about a dude who can use a TV clicker to control HIS LIFE!  Holy hell could I ever use somethin’ like that there invention!  My old lady’s always tellin’ me to get the Camaro washed and pick up the food stamps and drop Little Dale Jr. off over at the trailer park park, so boy would it ever be nice to be able to press pause and rewind and all that.  Actually, I’d be happy just to have a VCR. 

Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector – Dear Jesus, thank you so much for blessing us with this movie.  I been hopin’ for this movie to happen for a long time now, and damned if you didn’t hear my prayers and git ‘er done.  I can already tell how much I’m gonna love this movie cause in the 2 minute trailer, Larry makes fun of women, Asians, Jews, homosexuals, black people and Biff from Back To the Future.  I know you did this, Jesus, ’cause this is a movie that could only be made in heaven.

The Da Vinci Code and Basic Instinct 2 after the jump.

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Steve Martin Is Smarter Than the Haters (Me Too)

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A few weeks ago, I wrote a defense of Steve Martin‘s remake of The Pink Panther because there were so many haters out there doing what they do best. Hating, that is. Anyway, guess which movie beat the pants off V for Vendetta in the UK this weekend? You guessed it, the wild and crazy inspector himself. So let this be a lesson to all of you who doubt Steve Martin’s judgment. He’s smarter than you, richer than you, and he’s always right. And if you have a problem with that, well excuse me.

While You Were Wondering Whether You Need More “Bling”

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Purpleprince

  • Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen are starting a new advice column on their website, where their teenage girl fans can get answers to important questions like, "What’s the best way to induce vomiting?" and "Which dealers don’t mind delivering?"
  • Real Estate 101: If you sell Prince a house, the purple’s part of the deal.  Duh.
  • Michael Jackson is planning to revive his dying career by collaborating with hip-hop star 50 Cent.  His first single will be titled "In Da Cub Scout".
  • Blow Out’s super-amazing totally laid-back completely humble gift to humanity man-god Jonathan Antin was once arrested for beating up his girlfriend.  But now he’s, like, just totally focused on his, like, rockin’ career and his amazing family and creating the best hair products in the world you can buy for the low, low price of blah blah blah….
  • Fred Savage and his wife have proudly announced that they’re expecting their first child.  I smell a Wonder Years sequel!

Natalie Portman Needs a Bodyguard

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Do you ever find yourself marveling at how pretty, poised and petite Natalie Portman is? Want to get it out of your system? Check out this incredibly creepy 3 minute video that strings together slo-mo clips of Natalie Portman over the years while the UK chart-topper "Gravity" plays in the background. Somewhere, the anonymous producer of this deranged homage to the V for Vendetta actress, is giving instructions to put the lotion in the basket.

(watch the video here)

LISTEN UP: Your Daily Dose of the Best Music Ever

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  • Jack_white_2
    The View from Yoorp has three tracks from that other Libertine, Carl Barat’s new band Dirty Pretty Things. You f**king love it.
  • You Ain’t No Picasso thinks that Guillemots could be the Arcade Fire of pop music. What do you think?
  • Today Mocking Music has a track from Tegan and Sarah’s old band Plunk, as well as Ted Leo’s classic cover of Kelly Clarkson’s "Since U Been Gone." If you haven’t already downloaded it, now’s your chance.
  • Have you ever listened to Claire Danes’ ex-boyfriend Ben Lee? Well, you can now. Go download "Aftertaste" over at Yeti Don’t Dance.
  • No Frontin’ is the place to be today, with tracks by Three 6 Mafia, Ugly Duckling, Superchunk, My Morning Jacket, and Elbow. They’re seriously not frontin’.
  • Miss Jack White? Here’s another track from his side project, The Raconteurs. I miss Meg.

What’s Wyclef Talking About?

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Shakira_1

This week, Shakira and Wyclef’s hit song "Hips Don’t Lie" is everywhere from Verizon commercials to billboard charts. Like the title of her album "Oral Fixation" the song focuses on the Latin singer’s sensuality, in particular her battery-powered hips. 

In the song, Wyclef and Shakira partake in flirty duet banter. He says,"I never really knew that she could dance like this/She makes a man wants to speak Spanish". And she says "Oh baby when you talk like that/ You make a woman go mad/So be wise and keep on/Reading the signs of my body," and three quarters through the song you really feel their chemistry and believe her hips are telling the truth. 

But then Wyclef breaks out into a mysterious, politically-charged rap that makes us think he has ulterior motives besides bagging the hip-mistress. See the lyrics to his bizarre rap after the jump …

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I Alone Love You

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Livesinger
Now that you’ve trolled through the blogosphere and pored over all those breathless "ohmygod it was SO amazing you should have been there then David Bowie came out the the Smiths reunited holy moly" recaps of SXSW, BWE’s own Aziz Ansari takes a fond look back at his visit to South By Southwest, circa 1994!

Monster Church Rally

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Jesustruck2

There is a great radio spot for a church at AdRants. It was done by Mike McKenzie for Birmingham, AL St. Andrew’s Episcopal Church and "mirrors the tone and style of those monster truck ‘Suuuundaaaaaaay’ commercials replacing the usual auto-speak with church-speak." Ammmeeeeennnnn!

Sneak Preview: Tonight’s Black.White

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Everybody’s talking about the new F/X show Black.White. Black people are talking. White people are talking. Everybody’s talking. Well, we got our hands on a sneak preview of tonight’s episode. It’s truly riveting stuff. You can watch it right here… but first, I should warn you. The reality of the whole thing might be too much for you to handle. Good luck.