- GLAAD is honoring Charlize Theron for her efforts in improving the image of the gay community by playing a terrifying lesbian serial-killer in Monster.
- Are Jude Law and Sienna Miller getting back together? Doesn’t matter – just use this as an opportunity to visualize the kind of make-up sex they would have.
- Melanie Griffith is being sued for not revealing the name of the fashion designer responsible for how she looked at a recent red carpet appearance. Following suit, the drug company that makes Xanax is planning a massive lawsuit against all of Hollywood.
- Rapper Nelly wants to do more acting, but isn’t ready to cry on cue yet. Not to worry, though – once he’s blown through what’s left of his "hasn’t been hot in herrre in awhile" fortune on gold teeth and diamond-plated bathroom floors, he’ll be sobbing like Sally Field on Oscar night.
- A prison guard was recently disclipined after screening Brokeback Mountain for the inmates. He defended himself by insisting that it was "a real crowd-pleaser".
- Is Jamie-Lynn Spears finally ready to follow in her big sister’s footsteps and become a smoking hot sex symbol before spiraling deeper and deeper into a confusing of unattractiveness and self-destruction?
Hubba Hubba. Danza’s got some pinch-able pecs.
What do Chi McBride, Bebe Neuwirth, and Christian Finnegan have in common? Well, Chi starred in Boston Public, Bebe played Lillith on Cheers (which took place at a bar in Boston), and Christian used to get beaten up by kids in school who wore Boston Red Sox hats. So there’s that.
Oh, and there’s one more thing: They’re all going to be on The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson tonight. So make sure you TIVO that mofo. It should be wicked fun.
Check out some more Christian Finnegan media here.
Gavin Newsom, the handsome mayor of San Francisco has it all: good looks, a rising political career and stunning actress, Sophia Milos, as a girlfriend. But now he may have something else…
According to Scene in the Tropics, Paris Hilton had an affair with the handsome Mayor of San Francisco, Gavin Newsom. In fact Newsom’s name appeared in Paris’ hacked sidekick while he was still married . While he’s since divorced his wife, and cut off his relationship with the heiress (who’s rumored to have an itchy VD) we’re sure Paris has left her mark on politics. And unfortunately, it’ll never go away.
Even though he’s been dead for thousands of years, History’s Original Delivery Guy, Moses himself, seems like he just might be having the Best Week Ever!
First of all, this week marks the beginning of Passover, in which the jews honor Moses for helping free them from Egyptian slavery by having a long, confusing meal. And this weekend Christians are celebrating Easter, which doesn’t really have anything to do with Moses, but he’s in the Bible too, so that has to count for something.
Next, ABC is airing a very special, very unnecessary re-make of the classic film The Ten Commandments, which is all about my man Moses receiving the holy law from God, forever rendering American Idol as sinful as it is addictive (rule #1, yo).
And perhaps most importantly, the lead singer of Coldplay and his movie star wife named their newborn son "Moses", maybe after the song from his band’s live album, but probably after the Old Testament figure in question. Either way, dude’s having a pretty good week – way to go, Moses!
Oscar loves nothing more than movie stars flexing their thespian muscles in roles in which they must transform their beautiful selves into human trainwrecks, painstakingly mimicking the speech and behavioral patterns of the disabled, drug-addled, homosexual, mentally ill, plain ugly, etc. This year some lucky actress gets to add "non-responsive vegetative person who can’t speak or move" to this hallowed list of Oscar bait as Hollywood has decided the time is finally right for the Obligatory Terri Schiavo Movie. You can bet every agent in Tinseltown is on the horn right now, desperately trying to convince the studios that their starlet is the perfect candidate for the role of America’s most famous unconscious person. Here are my picks for the best casting choices:
Why Her? Knowing how Hollywood likes to "sex things up" a bit, what better way to do so than the aging warhorse that is Sharon Stone’s genitals? Just think about all the possibilities for the soon-to-be-infamous "changing the bed pan/legs crossing" scene.
actress musician artist celebrity human being gave an exclusive interview to Media Take Out and "answers the questions that you’ve been dying to ask." Yes!
Is she a lesbian? Is she sorry about spitting on New York? Did she have sex with Flavor Flav? Where can I get a clock like that and when will she go away already? Okay, maybe not the last two… but she’s all over the other ones. Listen to it here.
Okay, I had to post a link to this video because it contains two of my favorite things in the world.
1. The Red Sox losing miserably
2. Nintendo’s RBI Baseball
This guy spent lord-knows how many hours mashing up the classic 8-Bit Nintendo video game with the famous game-ending sequence from Game 6 of the 1986 World Series. You remember that, Red Sox fans, right? The one where Mookie Wilson hit a slow ground ball through the legs of first baseman Bill Buckner? Ring a bell? Well, if you’re a baseball fan, an RBI Baseball fan, or if you just like watching stuff on the internet to avoid doing work, click here now. Oh, and be sure to forward it to your friends in Boston. Link thanks to Deadspin.
- Prince won’t make an appearance on American Idol. Doesn’t see any future Sheila E’s in this crop of candidates.
- Teri Hatcher will be the highest paid actress in TV with a salary of $6 million. That covers at least one more week of botox maintenance.
- Ryan Seacrest buys Kevin Costner’s house. But not his role as Jennifer Aniston’s leading man in Rumor Has It.
- Macaulay Culkin is cool with mixed reviews for his book Junior. Not as cool with mixed drinks, in fact sloppy.
- Britney is binge eating to numb pain of her relationship. But there are not enough Twinkies in the world to numb this one.
- Lindsay Lohan looks too American for Louis Vuitton’s campaign. And by American they mean trashy.
It’s the "year of the queer"! Finally!
Joseph R. Gannoscoli, better known to Sopranos fans as Vito (and better known to Celebrity Fit Club fans as That Fat Guy, Joseph Gannoscoli) did his part in last night’s episode of the hit HBO drama to make sure we don’t forget the Year of the Queer anytime soon. The rotund mobster was caught dancing it up in a gay club wearing an outfit that was so over-the-top it would make the Leather Guy from the Village People stop short and say, "Wow, that is gaaaaaay." (In case you missed it, you can see a clip on last night’s Best Night Ever podcast)
After watching last night’s episode, I’m going to agree that it is the Year of the Queer. Though somebody should probably tell the Department of Corrections in Massachussetts, where a corrections officer is being discliplined for showing the movie Brokeback Mountain to inmates. One offended prisoner turned away from the screen mumbling "Jeez, that is the gayest thing I have ever seen. Well… on second thought…"