…Of The Day

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Kid_rockk
SADDAM HUSSEIN T-SHIRT SLOGAN: "I am the Head of State!" (Breitbart)

STARBUCKS RANT: The Kid from Brooklyn, who doesn’t understand why you’re paying $7 for a coffee and piece of pound cake. (Gawker)

IRONIC NEWS: Kid Rock is afraid of germs. Really Kid Rock? Really? You solely date porn stars. I mean, really?? (Contact Music)

EXCITING NERD NEWS: Filming on the Star Wars TV show is expected to start next year. Cynics are expected to announce that it sucks shortly thereafter. (Starpulse)

MP3: The Sopranos Megamix– Do The Malanga! (Download it here)

WHILE YOU WERE FEELING SORRY FOR BREE

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Marciacross1

  • Young MC has sued a publishing company for failing to pay royalties for songs he wrote. The guy he’s suing is his best friend’s Harry’s brother Larry. Young has never respected that guy.
  • Sir Sean Connery is suing a country and golf club in America, claiming they used his name to boost business. Meanwhile, Daniel Craig is being considered as the spokesman for Putt-Putt.
  • Nick Lachey and Kristin Cavallari keep getting spotted together yet they keep insisting that they’re just friends. And we keep telling you about it.
  • Britney Spears was reportedly thinking of splitting with Kevin Federline until she found out that she was pregnant again. So it’s true: Having kids does save a marriage.
  • Desperate Housewives is set to shock fans with a lesbian storyline involving Bree Van De Kamp. Sounds like DH is ready to put on the leather jacket and skis.
  • "It sucks." That is Lindsay Lohan‘s reaction to the recent crackdown on underage drinking at LA clubs. I think this is a good thing. She already missed out on her childhood, she shouldn’t be deprived of having to get some guy outside the liquor store to buy her some Boone’s Farm like every other teenager.

Tribute to K-Fed: Yo Yo Now

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I think K-Fed’s "PopoZao" is song of the year, hands down. In fact, it excited me so much, that I’ve decided that I want to be a hip-hop artist too. From now on, I will be known as J-Fed. My first single is inspired by "PopoZao" and it’s about the thing I love the most: spinning Yo-Yos. It’s fire!

Lyrics after the jump so you can rap along.

Read more…

GAMES: Deal or No Deal

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Mandel

We know you’ve been pining to be on Deal or No Deal, if just to flirt with pirate-cum-game show host Howie Mandel. While we can’t guarantee you a place on the show, we can provide you with a way to practice your deal-making skills (A.K.A guessing). Crapville hosts this no-frills adaptation, sans Mandel or the leggy briefcases. But before you play, make sure you’ve got some time on your hands because this computer version goes on forever, just like the real thing.

Are Robots Having the Best Week Ever?

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Irobotpic7

You may be familiar with Isaac Asimov‘s first law of robots: They should not harm humans. Well, the United States government has never let a little thing like a law keep it from protecting its citizens. According to the Inquirer (via Slashdot), the United Sates army is deploying killer robots in Iraq. The robots, called SWORDS (Special Weapons Observation Reconnaissance Detection Systems), are equipped with either the M249, machine gun which fires 5.56-millimeter rounds at 750 rounds per minute or the M240, which fires 7.62-millimeter rounds at up to 1,000 per minute. Didn’t they see I, Robot? Okay, that’s a silly question. In any case, I think it’s a good idea to declare that robots are having the Best Week Ever. And on a personal note, I’d like to say that I’ve always loved robots and I would be glad to serve them in any capacity. Long live SWORDS, our exalted overlords!

BWE Photoshop Contest: Drunk Jakey G

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Jake_katie_1
Hey guys, it’s only a day old, but we’ve already gotten a ton of great Jake Gyllenhaal photoshop entries, like this one with a very pregnant (and thirsty) Katie Holmes.

Think you can do better? Well, then get your Jake cut-outs here and get started.

Email them to: BWEphotoshopContest@gmail.com.

And may the best Drunk Jakey G win.

Hef’s Girl Loves Her Some Lovitz

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Lovitz

We here a Best Week Ever love to watch young love blossom; and today we were lucky enough to discover a relationship we didn’t even know existed. Kendra Wilkinson, the sporty, peroxide-blond girlfriend of Hugh Hefner currently starring in E!’s The Girls Next Door, seems to have sparked up a close friendship with SNL veteran Jon Lovitz.  One of three women belonging to the Playboy magnate, 20 year old Kendra seems to have started cozying up with Mr. Lovitz in February. How do we know? Take a look at this message Wilkinson left on Lovitz’s MySpace page.

2/18/2006 11:16 PM
that was a nice drive that we took after the party!!lololol!! you comin over tomorrow to have some fun with me??

In the past month, she’s left 3 more revealing messages that suggest Hef better watch his back. We’ve got them all after the jump…

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While You Were Filling Out Your NCAA Tournament Bracket

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  • Vin_diesel_1
    Vin Diesel
    wants to sing and dance in a remake of Guys & Dolls. Marlon Brando rolls over in his grave, whispers, "But Vin Diesel sucks."
  • Demi & Ashton may be adopting a baby. The couple cites "age" as the reason, meaning that The Kutch just can’t get it up like he used to.
  • George Clooney DID NOT write a blog for The Huffington Post. He wants to leave the blogging to the ugly.
  • The author of the short story that Brokeback Mountain was based on thinks the movie was robbed at the Oscars, and does not appreciate Crash’s come from behind victory. Because coming from behind was Brokeback‘s thing.
  • Courtney Love is headed back to the studio. This marks the first time I’ve ever finished a sentence that starts with "Courtney Love is headed back" with two words other than "to rehab."
  • Movie theaters may ask federal authorities to jam cell phone reception in movie theaters. If this does go through, pricks from coast to coast are already prepared to protest.
  • Jay Leno apologizes for not being funny. It’s about time.