While You Were Getting Your Boss’s Free Starbucks Coffee

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Kanye

  • Nicole Kidman becomes the next incredibly morphing celebrity as she starts to resemble Keith Urban. Hopefully she won’t assume his streaks.
  • Starbucks is giving away free coffee nationwide from 10-12 today.
  • Honey! Andy Dick got out again and he’s running loose in Austin. I told you it’s best to keep him locked up .
  • Is Jessica Simpson preggers? Did I just write the word preggers? Shoot me.
  • Kanye West will produce a feature film inspired by his music…Tentatively titled the Passion of the Christ 2.
  • It’s not fair! On the Jewish Holiday of Purim, Madonna’s family doesn’t have to go to temple and eat dry hamentashen. They get to dress up as french maids and party at a nightclub. And Madonna says they’re still in the book of life.

SIZZLER: Tom and Katie Already Married?

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It’s being reportedly supposedly alleged that not only are Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes not over, they’re already married. The National Enquirer says that they got hitched in a ceremony eight months ago. The Enquirer had more details:

[O]ne of the church’s chaplains married the couple early last July in a ceremony at sea.

TomKat, who met a few months earlier, are said to have exchanged rings emblazoned with triangular Scientology symbols during a Caribbean cruise aboard the sect’s ship the Freewinds, reports the New York Daily News.

I hate it when people get married in secret, but at least I still have four months to send them a gift.

…Of The Day

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Diddylovestivo
TRIBUTE: A Press Your Luck clip, featuring the greatest Press Your Luck player EVER. (Gorillamask)

MIDNIGHT MOVIE-ESQUE HEADLINE: Daytona Prostitutes Hunting Serial Killer (local6)

REALITY SHOW YOU’RE NOT GOING TO WATCH: P. Diddy’s Celebrity Cooking Showdown (The Celebrity Blog)

AMERICAN IDOL FAVORITE: We got Chris Daughtry at 7-2 odds. How about you? (EW)

ANOTHER REASON THAT IT’S HARD OUT THERE FOR A PIMP: You have to hang out with Paris Hilton. Sorry, Three 6 Mafia. (TMZ)

EMBARRASSING BASEBALL RELATED STORY: Doc Gooden arrested… again. Barry Bonds immediately sends him a thank-you note for keeping him out off the headlines today. (SI)

When Microsoft Makes Fun of Itself, It’s Not Funny

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Msipod022gk

Remember that Microsoft i-Pod parody? The one that imagined how clunky, wordy and dull the packaging for the MP3 player would be if the PC giant created it? I’m sure you assumed, like the rest of us, that the film was devised by some inflamed Apple revolutionary in an underground lair filled with other like-minded, Mac-obsessed hipsters with creative haircuts intent on overthrowing the Bill Gates empire.

But guess what?  Microsoft made the video! It turns out those wacky dudes in Seattle have a great sense of humor about themselves. Unfortunately now that we know Microsoft created it, it’s just not as cool anymore.

WHILE YOU WERE WISHING YOU WERE RIC OCASEK

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Paulina_porizkova_50

  • Charlize Theron is being lined up to star in a film about Dusty Springfield. In other words, after playing ugly for Oscars, she’s switched to the Reese Witherspoon model.
  • King Kong has been voted the best movie of 2005, earning it the top prize at the Empire Awards. For those of you not familiar with the Empire Awards, it is the award given by the World Gorilla Association. 
  • Speaking of King Kong, Jack Black has reportedly eloped with his girlfriend, Tanya Haden.  Let’s hope she doesn’t go Yoko on Tenacious D.
  • Will Ferrell is not dead
  • The Cars are getting back together, with Todd Rundgren taking over for Ric Ocasek. I’ll bet he’d rather take over for Ric as Paulina Porizkova‘s husband! 
  • Vince Vaughan wants Jennifer Aniston to gain 20 pounds so he’s giving her lots of sweets and booze. If anyone knows how to put on 20 pounds, it’s Vince Vaughn.

Is James Lipton Having the Best Week Ever?

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Insidetheactorsstudiobig

Recently, the actors that have been appearing on Inside the Actors Studio have been slightly below the standards we’ve come to expect from the show. Sure, we all love Martin Lawrence, but he isn’t exactly Uta Hagen. Well, it was just announced that the upcoming season will feature Al Pacino, Don Cheadle, Robert Downey Jr., and Tom Hanks. They will also welcome their 200th guest, Tom Hanks Dustin Hoffman. Welcome back to the A List, Inside the Actors Studio, and we officially add James Lipton as a candidate for Best Week Ever!

REMAKING OUT: The Re-Makes We’d Like to See

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Kotter
Dimension Films is adapting Welcome Back, Kotter for the big screen, but with…wait for it…Ice Cube in the title role.

And what about remaking Dallas, but with Jennifer Lopez!  Forget JR, just wait until America has to wrap its mind around "Who shot J. Lo?"

In celebration of Hollywood’s willingness to put forth that extra bit of creative energy and originality by re-making every movie and television show in existence, your friends here at Best Week Ever are starting a new segment in which we beg and plead for the moviemakers to microwave the entertainment WE’D like to see again and again.

For this week’s installment, in honor of the above announcements: TV Shows reimagined…but with black people instead of white people!

Original Show: WKRP In Cincinnati
New Title: Droppin’ Hits
Concept: This classic radio station workplace comedy gets "hipped up" with an edgy, urban new cast, now working at a hip-hop station on satellite radio (to keep things modern!) 
Suggested Cast: Wayne Brady as the Wacky DJ, Charles S. Dutton as the curmudgeonly programming director and Tyra Banks as the foxy new receptionist.

Read more…