Sopranos Remix: Do the Malanga!

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Sunday night’s premiere of The Sopranos had everybody talking the next day.  Is Tony okay?  What does this all mean?  And perhaps most importantly, what the f*ck did Junior say when he shot him

We don’t really know, but whatever he said, we’re obsessed with it.  Check out our new mash-up!

The Greatest Hoaxes of All Time

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As you may have heard by now, the story that Will Ferrell died in a paragliding accident was just a hoax, and a lame one at that. It was factually wrong, mathematically challenged, and included spelling errors. But if you like a good hoax, you might like to see this list of the 100 best April Fool’s hoaxes of all time at the Museum of Hoaxes. It includes the Swiss Spaghetti Harvest, Sidd  Finch, the Taco Liberty Bell, Nixon for President in ’92, and tons of other great ones. The list is incredibly entertaining, and also it might inspire you for April Fool’s in a couple of weeks.

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Who’s Who In Your NCAA Basketball Pool

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DukeIf you’re like most Americans, chances are you’ve received an email or a phone call from a friend asking you if you’re interested in joining their NCAA basketball pool. And, if you’re like most Americans with a slight gambling problem, you probably said yes.

Before you submit your sheet and write in UConn to win it all, Cracked is offering you a little who’s who in your Office Pool, so you know exactly what you’re going up against.

I like this little cheat sheet. I fall right in between the ‘You’ category and ‘The Guy Who Doesn’t Pick Any Upsets’, so my chances are pretty good this year.

So go Duke! (and every other team with a seed higher than the team it’s playing against!) I could use the $75.

SIZZLER: It’s a Boy!

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Tomkatieclap_2 US Weekly is happy to announce that Tom and Katie are having a boy!Now that TomKat are happily married, it’s safe to say their son will have a normal, healthy, upbringing just like any other kid in the undisclosed neighborhood. Tom will go to all of junior’s basketball games with his photographer buddies and Katie will read him bedtime stories about the friendly aliens that have infected our bodies. Oh the vitamins they’ll take, the church-going community they’ll build around them, but most exciting is the look on Tom’s face when he sees his little baby boy after along day year at work.

SIZZLER: Lindsay Lohan Wants to Get Married Like Britney

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Lindsay Lohan wants to follow in Britney Spears‘ (bare)footsteps:

The 19-year-old star would have no problem following in the singer’s footsteps because she would like to see what marriage feels like for a minute. She explains, "Marriage is a big deal, but who’s to say I’m not going to pull a ‘Vegas’ and get married just to get married and see what it’s like for a minute?"

It would awesome if she married the same guy that Britney married. How cool would it be to get to say, "I was married to Britney Spears AND Lindsay Lohan"? Step up, Jason Allen Alexander.

While You Were Getting Your Boss’s Free Starbucks Coffee

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  • Nicole Kidman becomes the next incredibly morphing celebrity as she starts to resemble Keith Urban. Hopefully she won’t assume his streaks.
  • Starbucks is giving away free coffee nationwide from 10-12 today.
  • Honey! Andy Dick got out again and he’s running loose in Austin. I told you it’s best to keep him locked up .
  • Is Jessica Simpson preggers? Did I just write the word preggers? Shoot me.
  • Kanye West will produce a feature film inspired by his music…Tentatively titled the Passion of the Christ 2.
  • It’s not fair! On the Jewish Holiday of Purim, Madonna’s family doesn’t have to go to temple and eat dry hamentashen. They get to dress up as french maids and party at a nightclub. And Madonna says they’re still in the book of life.