IN CASE YOU MISSED IT: Junior Said What?

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SPOILER ALERT: If you’re a Sopranos viewer and haven’t seen last night’s episode yet, stay in your cave and DON’T read this post!

Here’s the footage of what you’ve been hearing about by the watercooler all day.  A couple things about Uncle Junior: a) what the hell does he say right before he does the deed, and b) does anybody else think he seems like he’s straight out of a David Lynch film?

Intervention: Angelina Jolie

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Babies

It’s only because we love you, Angelina, that we’re gathered here today for this intervention. We ask that before you shut us out, you just listen to what we have to say. You’ve been acting, well, different, this past year.  You haven’t gone to work in months. You’ve dropped everything for your boyfriend.You won’t stay in one place; you’re in Paris one day, Cambodia the next. You’re just not the same Angelina we used to know.

We think we know why: first there was Maddox and we supported you on that, then Zaraha came and you promised it was the last one…until you got pregnant. And now we hear you want to adopt two more? Angie, this has gone to far, it’s time to face the fact that you’re ADDICTED TO BABIES.

While the effects may not be as sudden as drugs or booze, babe-a-holism is just as dangerous. Baby addiction is the #1 career killer amongst celebrities over 30. You need to get help. But you don’t have to do it alone. We’re with you 100%, but the first step is hand over the babies. All of them. (whats that in your pocket? baby!)

SIZZLER: Charlize Theron Splits Up With Boyfriend

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Charlizetheron02

Charlize Theron has apparently split with her boyfriend of five years, Stuart Townsend:

They reportedly grew apart due to filming schedules which kept them away from one another for months at a time. Speculation about the breakup has been strong since Theron claimed a few weeks ago that a marriage with Townsend was "not really what I want." His absence was noticeable at last Sunday’s Academy Awards and the BAFTA’s the week prior. A friend of Charlize says, "Charlize is free and single again. Her relationship with Stuart is well and truly over. They just grew apart. It wasn’t always easy because filming often kept them apart for months."

I knew something was wrong! Let’s hope she’ll be smiling again soon.

LISTEN UP: Your Daily Dose of the Best Music Ever

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Big_foever

  • My Old Kentucky Blog treats us to an old New York favorite: The Talking Heads’ And She Was. She sure was.
  • In last week’s roundup, Jason tipped me off to SoulClub.org. Now I’m tipping you off to Wendy Rene’s After Laughter Comes Tears. You’ll thank me, I’ll thank Jason.
  • Ground control to major blog.  Best Week Ever presents your next 10 minutes: enjoy Space Oddity. A blog soup hooks up this Bowie favorite.
  • It’s easy to make a good cover of The Cure’s Just Like Heaven. But making a so-so version is more of a challenge. Knob Tweakers posted this Atari-spawn of the song by David Sugar that manages to suck the soul right out of it. But don’t let my opinion sway you.
  • Cocaine Blunts hearts Biggie Smalls and Biggie Smalls hearts his bitch. Listen to the unreleased version Me & My Bitch and get in on the action.
  • If you loved Tom Brokaw’s The Greatest Generation, it probably won’t affect the way you feel about The Lost Generation, a 70′s soul outfit that tempers funk with a "resigned sadness." Thanks Ear Fuzz!
  • If you’ve already gone through the four stages of the Arctic Monkeys, it’s time for phase five: Watching their SNL performance online.

IN CASE YOU MISSED IT: That Rug Really Tied the Room Together

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Getyoutoe
The first time I ever saw The Dude do battle with the nihilists in the Coen Brothers‘ modern classic The Big Lebowski, I never could have imagined the impact this film would have on the lives of nerds, shut-ins and socially handicapped people such as myself.  And now, almost a decade after the film’s initial release, the Lebowski Culture is showing no signs of slowing down.

Lebowski Fest is a celebration of everything wonderful and bizarre about the film – women dressed as valkyries, music performed by a fictional band of nihilistic Germans, endless bowling tournaments and White Russians all around.  It pretty much sounds like the most fun thing ever.

With sellout events in 3 US cities every year, you probably won’t have to travel far to get in touch with your Inner Dude (or El Duderino, if you’re not into the whole brevity thing).  Check out these pics from last week’s party in LA.

While You Were Already Wishing It Was Friday

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    Rapper Young Jeezy was arrested after a shootout and charged with carrying a concealed weapon. Unfortunately he wasn’t shot himself, so industry experts only expect a slight bump in album sales instead of a massive one.
  • Jack Nicholson says the only way he’ll give Diane Keaton the time of day is if she starts acting more sexually adventurous. Are these two too senile to realize they don’t have to promote Something’s Gotta Give anymore?
  • Liv Tyler is mad at celebrity mothers who lose weight quickly after giving birth. Meanwhile, her husband is mad at himself for knocking up the wrong celebrity.
  • Kristin from Laguna Beach is NOT dating Nick Lachey. She’s not that desperate for her own reality show yet.
  • After purchasing the rights to all 63 episodes, Bravo will start airing HBO’s Six Feet Under. But only after they edit out all that boring heterosexual stuff.
  • If you’re a woman, you can’t hug James Earl Jones. No matter what kind of deal he gets you on a cell phone.

Netflix Guilt

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The_bicycle_thief

Netflix is perhaps the greatest thing to come along for home movies since the VCR. The selection is good, it’s easy, you can keep DVDs as long as you like, and it’s even pretty cheap. But there is a downside to the growing popularity of the online DVD movie rental service. I’m talking about Netflix Guilt. How many times has this happened to you:

Read more…

IN CASE YOU MISSED IT: ESPN’s Technical Difficulties

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Espn

When technical difficulties interrupt the zen flow of ESPN,  the network’s anchors have to improvise and manage to hold it together…for less than a minute.  Smit happens discovers how ESPN’s elite really talk when they think the cameras aren’t rolling. Listen for the "What the F*** Was That?" at the end of the clip. We couldn’t have put it better ourselves.

Donald Trump Gets Served!

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Chuck Lorre, the producer of the CBS yuk-fest Two and a Half Men has disliked The Donald ever since literally running into him years ago. Donald made Chuck feel like crap. Chuck knows how to hold a grudge.
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Now, as you may or may not know, Lorre is the producer who likes to leave a "vanity card" at the end of the credits as a reward to the people out there who tape Two and a Half Men (or as I like to call them, people in their mid-40′s.) Anyway, in last week’s rant, Chuck took a dig at the man who dismissively brushed him off years ago.

After
all these years, the memory that lingers, the image that haunts, is of
his smug pout and condescending hand gesture that somehow caused me to
feel utterly insignificant. I was reminded of all this when I looked at
the ratings of Two and a Half Men versus the ratings of The Apprentice.  Hey, Donald, I just bumped into you again!

It’s on! You can read Chuck’s entire diss here (it’s episode 153). Or you could just pop in your tape of Two and a Half Men and hit ‘pause’ at the end. I’m sure that’s what Donald is doing right now.