SIZZLER: Kate Moss Back With Pete Doherty?

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Rav from the News of the World has an update on that crazy on-again, off-again (in more than one way) couple, Kate Moss and Pete Doherty:

KATE MOSS and junkie badboy PETE DOHERTY are an item again, I can exclusively reveal. The couple have enjoyed a string of nights together at her £2.5 million country retreat in Gloucestershire. And she’s even given him a key to her new pad in St John’s Wood, north London.
It comes just days after Doherty scrawled "I love Kate 4eva" on his car window as he left court after facing new drugs charges. Last night a source revealed: "It’s the news Kate’s been trying to hide, but it’s true they’re spending more and more time together… "Pete’s like a love-sick teenager all over again."

So if you’re having problems with your girlfriend, just get arrested and write her name on a car window as you leave court. Works every time!

SIZZLER: Britney Puts K-Fed on an Allowance

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Britney Spears has reportedly had it with Kevin Federline‘s "spend-happy" ways. So she’s come up with a way to deal with it:

Insiders said Spears has put Federline…on a budget. "Each month, he will be allotted a certain amount of money for personal use – i.e., clothing, nightclubs, booze and day-to-day activities. Any big items – cars, or trips that go over allowance – need to be approved by Brit herself," said one source.

This isn’t surprising, considering money problems are a big cause of stress in marriages, especially if the wife makes more money than the husband. But things should be fine once the royalties from "PopoZao" start rolling in.

…OF THE DAY

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GREEK HEIR: Alexander III. Apparently this heir to the Stavros/Lastis throne is dating Lindsay Lohan. It’s a good time to be Greek in Hollywood.  (Socialite Life)

PITTY PARTY: Oscar-Winning Crash producer claims she’s broke. Will work for millions. (CNN)

BIN LADIN: Wafah Dufour Bin Ladin is stealing the spotlight from her Uncle Osama. The aspiring singer has landed her very own reality show. It doesn’t hurt to be connected. (yahoo)

MASHUP: I-porn. The i-pod commercial reinterpreted with porn images could only be enhanced by a Brokeback Mountain theme song. (daily sixer)

PLAYLIST: It was a tossup between Alex’s, Cate’s and Patton Oswalts. But we had to give it Pres. Bush. With a playlist that includes Dan Maclain and the Archies, there’s no question the Monkees are on that ‘shuffle buddy’ too. (BWE)

The Four Stages of The Arctic Monkeys

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Don’t forget to tune into tonight’s ALL NEW episode of Best Week Ever at 11pm. And all weekend long (because you know how VH1 loves to do that). Here’s a taste…

While You Were Punching the Clock With Your Fist Full of Dollars

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  • Gay people, not to be discouraged by the feeble persuasions of the Academy, have formed an ad campaign of their own in order to thank the filmmakers of Brokeback Mountain.  Thank  God SOMEBODY is recognizing such an ignored, under-the-radar little film. 
  • The FBI arrested two bloggers for posting unreleased tracks from a Ryan Adams albums released last year.  The bloggers were let go when Feds realized that by the time the tracks were uploaded to the website, Adams had already recorded 7 more albums.
  • Doogie Howser was recently spotted on a NYC subway train.  Coincidentally, Vinnie was recently spotted in a NYC unemployment line. 
  • Lindsay Lohan’s smoking habit makes her mommy cry.  Her alleged coke habit, however, isn’t a problem.
  • HBO Sunday is back with the return of The Sopranos and the premier of polygamy drama Big Love.  So cook up some spaghetti, have a threesome and get ready for some great television!

Working The Real World

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Derek When I was in college, auditioning for the Real World was just another way to put off finding a real job. But these days landing one of those shows IS a real job and the perks are endless.  Landing an MTV reality show means a ticket to the Gauntlet and an automatic hosting gig on E! But thanks to Absolute Dawg, the real world/road rules blog, we’ve discovered that’s just the beginning.

This entire month, Katie Doyle and her Gauntlet 2 cast-mates Derek, Trishelle, Jamie and Landon are being put up in a fancy Acapulco hotel for MTV’s spring break. Here’s how Katie describes her average day at work this month:

"Landon and I are going to get massages later. There is nothing more relaxing than a massage right on the beach. We got invited on a yacht, and hung out with some cool people….We got more free clothes coming from American Eagle…We have awesome views and and a cool waterfall in our pool."

In my heart I know they’re just as envious of my life (she wrote from her cubicle that smells like onions).

Mary-Kate and Ashley = Selma and Patty?

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As you may have heard, Mary-Kate and Ashley appear to enjoy a cig from time to time. Well, they’re young and probably aren’t that worried about the long-term effects of smoking. But we ran a program on the BWE computer to simulate what the twins will look like if they keep smoking. What we found was not pretty (see above).

SIZZLER: Keith Urban Mocks Tom Cruise?

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Here’s something by the ol’ reliable National Ledger:

Nicole Kidman‘s honey Keith Urban is having a bit of fun at Nic’s-ex Tom Cruise according to one published report.  The country hunk apparently mocks Cruise in private, poking fun at his acting and of course mimicking his couch jumping antics from last year’s Oprah and Jay Leno appearances…. Urban is no Tom Cruise fan and reportedly refuses to meet girlfriend Nicole Kidman’s ex-hubby.

I don’t know why he shouldn’t make fun of Cruise. Everyone else does.