Corn Flakes: Your Essential Inessentials

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Flakes

  • Russell Crowe vows to mercilessly beat paparazzi with a bulky 1970′s rotary telephone should any of them dare to harass his pregnant wife (The Age)
  • Remember that one time, when Kanye stepped out of his bullet-proof Escalade and walked on water on his way to Puffy’s party where he miraculously turned Korbel into Cristal?  (The Gospel According to Yahoo! News)
  • And is Pamela Anderson his Mary Magdalene??? (MSN)
  • Brooke Shields is preparing to have another daughter!  Meanwhile, Tom Cruise is preparing to have another meltdown! (Yahoo!)
  • American Idol Judge Simon Cowell is under attack for insensitively questioning a male contestant’s sexuality.  For a man whose entire wardrobe consists of tight black t-shirts, it sort of seems like the pot calling the kettle black. (E! Online)
  • RIP Chris Penn (Reuters)

Take Me Down To Chocolate City

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Willy_nagin

"It’s time for us to rebuild a New Orleans, the one that should be a chocolate New Orleans. And I don’t care what people are saying in Uptown or wherever they are. This city will be chocolate at the end of the day. This city will be a majority African-American city. It’s the way God wants it to be. You can’t have it no other way."
New Orleans Mayor – C. Ray Nagin

It’s the best quote of 2006– and will probably remain so– which is why there was a need for Imnotchocolate.com. Go there now and pick up your Chocolate City hat, t-shirt and bumper sticker. And don’t worry, the money doesn’t go towards rebuilding New Orleans or anything respectable like that. Hey, you can’t have it no other way.

Aidan Quinn: Medicine Man

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NBC has canceled the one hour drama, The Book of Daniel, about a pill-popping preist after only four episodes.  This means Aidan Quinn, who played Father Daniel Webster on the show,  will have to find alternate roles that require ‘research’ on vicodin.

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Sweet (in)

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Jodie_sweetin28

We are saddened to hear about former Full House-mate Jodie Sweetin’s battle with Crystal Meth (as reported by the always reputable Globe Magazine).

But lets not harp on the bad, lets instead remember all the good times. And who better to reminisce than members of the Fans of Jodie Sweetin Yahoo Group?

Says supergirl4513: >what is your favorite funny thing jodie has said on
> "full house" to kimmy gibbler (andrea barber)? mine is
> when stephanie and gia were pretending to be 16 years
> old and stephanie promised kimmy she wouldn’t make any
> crack at her for a whole week if she kept quiet that
> she was 13. and then she told kimmy, "big bird called.
> he wants his legs back." thats funny.

Anyone else want to share?

Jack Black Topless

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Nachos1 _40612490_jack_black_203_ap1

There are some nice shots of Jack Black at I Watch Stuff! Here’s the set-up: "These are newish images from the comedy Nacho Libre, written and directed by Jared Hess of Napoleon Dynamite fame. If you think that’s a shirtless Jack Black playing a Mexican wrestler, you’re spot on." Delicious.

BWE Checks Out What’s Big In: JAPAN

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Anpanman2_1

Meet Anpaman: a crime fighting cartoon superhero made entirely of sweet red bean paste.    Strengths: He can fly, kick and punch. Plus his head is made of bread so he can always bake himself a new one as needed.  Arch Nemesis: Baikinman aka Bacteria Man. He wants to destroy Anpaman with powerful kitchen mold. Other super hero sidekicks include : Tendonman (his head is a donburi rice bowl with shrimp tempura poking out of the top) and Tenmusu-chan (her head is a rice ball with shrimp tempura). With a weekly cartoon show and hoards of merchandise, Japanese kids can’t seem to get enough of Anpaman and his legion of savory superheroes.

To sum up: things that aren’t American are really weird.

Coachella 2006– Or Not

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Coachella_1_2 Coachella_2_2

Okay, so neither have these have actually been confirmed or anything, but I know which one I’m rooting for to be real.

Which concert would you rather see, the one on the left or the one on the right? Vote now!

More Bengay, STAT!

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Rocky

What you’re looking at is one of the first official images released from Sony’s forthcoming Rocky VI.  That’s right, 50 year-old Sylvester Stallone is pulling the trunks back on for a big screen boxing battle with the most fearsome opponent he’s ever faced: his own irrelevancy. 

Find out more at (I can’t believe I’m actually about to type this) Rocky Balboa’s blog.

And be on the lookout for Rambo IV!

You think that Rambo thing is a joke, don’t you?  Then click the link, I dare you.  Wait, get a drink first.  Okay, now click. 

Yeah, I know…