The fallout from the Brandon Davis/Paris Hilton Paparazzi Video heard ’round the world continues, as Lindsay Lohan, never one to be out-tabloided, ruthlessly fights back against her detractors. First of all, she made sure to spend last night very publicly making out with Starving Nachos, Paris’ recent ex-boyfriend. And now she’s suddenly agreed to appear in an independent film called Bill, which is about a man whose wife has a fling with a local newscaster that ends up being broadcast over the Internet. Hmm, who else do we know whose filmed “fling” became the stuff of Internet legend? Could Lohan actually be playing Paris in a movie? Only time will tell, but the knives are most definitely out.
Props to TheJay who dropped off a post about Tom Hanks’ hair through the decades. Thanks to his chronological pictorial, we now know that Tom Hanks’ hair is a way better actor than Hanks ever was or will be. Unfortunately, in the Da Vinci Code, both parties were poorly directed.
Working here at the Vh1 Offices has a number of perks – access to almost every music video ever made, frequent celeb sightings, complimentary magazine subscriptions, and so on and so forth. But today in our break room, I witnessed something that trumps all those things, a sight that left me struck with wonder and awe, infinitely grateful that I am one of lucky few individuals privy to such unspeakable majesty. THIS veggie tray sat unassumingly on the counter, next to our water cooler:
Bet you’ve never seen that at your job.
- Tyra Banks has a moustache. And it isn’t an undercover disguise.
- Pat Robertson threatens U.S. with a tsunami. He’ll do it, don’t test him.
- John Stamos reveals his sexual exploits and says he and Rebecca Romijn lied about being together at the X-men 2 premiere. Confuses Howard Stern Show for confession.
- Lindsay Lohan should have flossed. Paris’s liver is stuck in her teeth.
- Ricky Gervais is water-bombed by a gang of students. No that’s not British slang.
- Runaway Bride’s wedding is officially off. Couldn’t see that coming.
- Bruce Willis is getting cozy with young co-star Tamara Feldman. Now Ashton will have some company at the kiddie table.
- Paul McCartney may lose one quarter of his fortune in the divorce. Still has just enough to retire comfortably.
You’ve probably noticed that a new celebrity catfight has broken out approximately every ten minutes this week. There must be something in the water out in Hollywood, because I haven’t seen this much widespread animosity since that pink “mood slime” turned everyone in NYC against each other in Ghostbusters II. Sometimes the fighting is justified, and we absolutely love every second of it! – Upgrade! Other times it’s just boooooooooring – Downgrade!
Tell us what you think!
We love receiving emails from our readers. This one was sent by a guy named Brandon D. from Los Angeles, California. The guy apparently has a thing for mariachi bands (click on the picture to make it bigger.) Thanks a lot Brandon!
In today’s episode, Tony sucks face.
Remember Charlie Sheen’s kid’s clothing line Sheen Kidz which debuted a few weeks ago –on the same day his wife got a restraining order against him? Sure Denise really pissed Charlie off, by sabotaging his fashion dreams. But she was just getting started. Now she’s starting her own kid’s clothing line to compete with Sheen Kidz called Kidtoure debuting this summer that will feature novelty t-shirts for girls up to 10 years old. So not only are they dragging their own kids into one of the messiest divorces in history, now every kid in the mall is going to have to choose between the two of them. You know how this is going to end: Sheen Kidz will be worn every other weekend, under supervision.
Upon further consideration of this week’s “Diva Beef” post, I’ve realized that the Dueling Bimbos of today really do mirror Hip-Hop’s infamous East Coast/West Coast rivalries from the late 90’s. Replace glocks with cell phones, dis tracks with tabloid quotes, and it’s essentially the same thing. This is long and complicated, so try to stay with me:
The Main Players
Now: Lindsay Lohan
Then: Biggie Smalls
Affiliation: East Coast
Lindsay Lohan and Biggie Smalls are both enormous personalities known for their voracious appetites (Biggie for food, Lindsay for men) and highly-visible presence on the NYC scene. Biggie dealt coke, Lindsay allegedly snorted it – and both of them ended up as the West Coast posse’s most reviled foe. No one knows the exact origins of the beefs between Big and ‘Pac, or Paris and Lindsay, but they constantly fought over issues like the opposite sex (Lil’ Kim/ Wilmer Valderrama), turf (drug trade/magazine covers) and overall respect (album sales/who gets to star in Brett Ratner’s next movie).
Recognizing that the British have more benefits than American folks, the rich and powerful have decided to throw us a bone. Where as yesterday, we had to pay for healthcare and we couldn’t watch the video footage of Pete Doherty’s syringe blood squirt because it was only available on MTV Overdrive in the UK, today one of those problems has been solved.
Go to MTV overdrive and scroll down for a link to the footage.