For four and a half seasons now, Jack Bauer has outsmarted every single one of his enemies on the hit show 24. Habib Marwan? Dead. Nina Myers? Also dead. Dennis Hopper? He died too… why do you think you haven’t seen him since? The point is, no matter who Jack Bauer has gone up against, he’s always ended up on top. Until this week.
Last night, Jack came face to face with perhaps the greatest force he’s ever had to deal with: Robocop. Okay, actually it was the guy who played Robocop, Peter Weller. But that’s close enough.
Does Jack have what it takes to bring Robocop down? You remember the opening scene of the movie-- Weller gets absolutely destroyed but he manages to live through it. Do you think Jack Bauer is capable of delivering a greater beating than that? The answer:
Well, yes. He can. And in all likelihood he probably will. So that’s why I think Robocop’s having the Best Week Ever. He’s back in the public eye, he’s getting the upper hand on Jack, and chances are he doesn’t have too many weeks left to live. That has "Best Week Ever" written all over it.
There’s a fun quiz called "What’s Your Nominee Style?" that tells you which Oscar nominee you are most like. I took it and I’m most like Felicity Huffman ("Low-Maintenance Hottie"). It lists my "must haves" are: "Lip balm, wear-with-anything shoes, one perfect all-purpose bag and a favorite comfy sweater — and you practically invented blue jeans yourself!" It’s eerily accurate, except I have two bags: One for knocking around town and another little black one for when I got out to dinner or a party.
(Thanks to Barbie Martini.)
That lovable ladies man and perpetual bachelor Tom Cruise has finally set a date to marry his one true love, Katie Holmes. While most celebrities would try to hide their wedding date from the press, we’re sure Tom wants the world to know his wedding is set for July 4th 2006. In fact, he’d like to extend the ‘save the date’ cards to the paparazzi so they can be sure to make the event . More details about the wedding after the jump…
Danza does a little ditty about Dubuque
We checked the yahoo buzz log to find out who was being searched for on the internet today. While the usual suspects like Keira Knightly and Scarlett Johannson made the list of buzz-worthy actresses, we were surprised to find Danielle Fischel as the #15 most searched actress on the internet. While there’s no particular reason why the nation
of perverts is clamoring for Topenga from the mid-90′s TGIF sitcom Boy Meets World, we’ve decided not to judge and to simply consildate your search, with the most updated D-Fish info after the jump…
We here at BWE love Paul Scheer. Look at that face, how could you not?
This is the first ever BWE Photoshop Contest. Below the jump we’ve included 3 Paul Scheer heads for you to play with. Now it’s YOUR turn to decide what to do with them.
Email your submissions to: BWEphotoshopContest@gmail.com
Whoever submits our favorite entry will get a prize. The deadline is March 7, 2006, so make sure you get them in before that.
Where do you want to put Paul? The options are endless…
See another example, and get the full Paul Scheer heads by clicking below.
What do you get when you add one part Wife Swap, two parts Soul Man and a dash of Ice Cube, all mixed together in a pot full of bad ideas? FX’s new reality show Black.White., which chronicles the wacky adventures of a white family in blackface and a black family painted white.
I challenge you to gaze upon the show’s official website, roll over the faces of the families, and try to figure out what is more absurd:
- The fact that the white dad in blackface looks more like Martin Sheen in Apocalypse Now than he does any black dude I’ve ever seen, and the black dad in whiteface looks like a sketch character from Chappelle’s Show?
- Ice Cube‘s most "poignant" comment on racial issues since N.W.A.?
- Or is it the startling arrogance of a heavy-handed reality show (on FX nonetheless) that presumes to legitimately illustrate the complexities of race relations in contemporary America?
Be sure to tune in next Wednesday. If you can just get past those icky feelings of offensive awkwardness, you might learn something about how white people and black are so different, they’re actually the same!
The Las Vegas police have decided that it’s time to crack down on underage stars going to 21-and-over clubs. Well, that is if you think Paris Hilton‘s boyfriend, Stavros Niarchos, is a star. The Venetian and Hard Rock Hotel allowed Niarchos into their clubs for New Year’s Eve parties and it was caught on tape, so the authorities aren’t happy. We don’t think Paris should have to go out alone, so we’ve made a fake ID for Stavros. Have a great time, kids!