The Baby Review

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"once watched Madison’s father stumble out of a dive bar with a leathery
old whore so he could sodomize her in the back seat of his Jetta. Back
then, I thought I was witnessing the final, sordid aria of my friend’s
operatic downward spiral, but what I could never have predicted was
that his true denouement would be less Icarus, more common animal dying
in the woods."

Your source for informed, insightful evaluations of recently disgorged humanity.[the baby review]

It’s that time again folks: Paris loses her digital camera

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"Paris doesn’t shed tears over people. They’re like spilled milk, ya know? But losing one’s
video camera at a club, now this
is call for waterworks! But yo! Earth to Planet Paris–what the hell
are ya doing trotting around a damn recording device at a club?

She enlisted the help of fellow revelers to find her device, to no
avail. "She was very anxious and crying for some time," said a
tear-witness."

Uh Oh! Isn’t it about time for Paris’s album to break out? It appears that  Ms.Hilton can’t hold on to anything (ever) …first she lost her very 1st sex tape…followed by her sidekick…her friends…then her dog…and now it’s her digital camera that will surely be found with more scandalous footage. Hmm. Will it feature one of her Greek boys?  Time will only tell…and I’m sure this wasn’t planned at all. Not. At. All. Well, at least she will always have her Paris…wait…scratch that.[E! story]

Wednesday Morning Quick Hits

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For those who’d rather pay a lot of money than use their VCR or TiVo,
CBS and NBC to offer shows anytime on demand for 99 cents each.   Profits expected to be in the hundreds.

P Diddy spends £200,000 pimping out his van — now has a much larger penis.

Teller,
Penn’s quiet partner, gives interview. We think. If a silent magician
talks to a reporter over the phone, does it make a sound?

Thailand’s only pandas married in ceremony, will honeymoon in Bangkok.

Siegfried & Roy Vow Return to Stage, Tigers Vow to Finish Partially Eaten Fruitcake.

Johnny Rotten wants Justin Timberlake to play him in an upcoming movie.
In other news, Sid Vicious and Nancy Spungen to be played by Ricky
Schroeder and Mandy Moore.

Vibe reports controversial billboard of 50 Cent "holding a bun in one
hand and a mic in the other" has been taken down in Philly. Hot dog on
hot dog violence reportedly down

morning musume vs. lizard

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" clip from a tv special for 5th gen member konno asami. morning musume faces off against a giant lizard. "

Funniest. thing. ever. That’s that… I’m moving to Japan, their reality tv is so much cooler than ours.[google video link]

Dennis Rodman Kisses and Tells

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"Dennis Rodman has a new autobiography named I Should Be Dead By Now in which he tells the bedroom tales of his past experiences with lovers such as Carmen Electra and Madonna."

This may be the one celebrity autobiography worth buying. It also might be a book you wish to add to your "things to buy and ship to Madonna’s children" list. Ahhh yes, the perfect Christmas gift don’t you think?['I don't like you in that way' post]