GAMES: Attack of the Influenza Birds

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Chicken__cartoon_4 Are you totally freaking out about the bird flu and the possibility that the cough you have is really a sign that your body is eating itself from the insides and you’ll soon turn into a zombie alongside the rest of the global population?

Here’s something that will make you feel better for a few minutes. In Attack of the Influenza Birds, you’ve got to shoot as many chickens infected with the H5N1 virus as possible and save the world. No pressure, though.

WHILE YOU WERE PUNCHING UP THAT SCRIPT

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Now snake-free!

  • A yen for Yen: Japanese housewives are amassing secret fortunes.
  • Shirley MacLaine has yet another life. This time in Hollywood!
  • Boy George doesn’t believe in gay marriage, wants to be called Boy George W. 
  • How do you make money selling free Ricky Gervais podcasts? Volume.
  • Catherine Keener doesn’t want you in her green room, even if you do donate money to PBS.
  • Which will come first: Chinese Democracy or Indiana Jones? My money’s on Indy.
  • Is it too late to get our money back, Karyn Bosnak?

Lend Jon Stewart A Helping Hand

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So Jon Stewart is getting ready to host the Oscars. Now, we here at Best Week Ever have no doubt that he will do a stellar job. He’s Jon Stewart. But we were hoping you could lend him a hand by writing out some jokes for this first timer. So who do you want him to go after? Should he pull a Chris Rock and attack Jude Law, or a David Letterman and harrass Uma Thurman? Should he pull a Billy Crystal and sing a song, or a Whoopi Goldberg and shave off his eyebrows? Again, totally your call.

After all that Jon Stewart’s done for you, it’s the least you can do. So leave your ideas in the comments section and who knows… maybe he’ll use your jokes at the big event (Assuming he reads this blog, of course.)

Frankie and Jessie Catch a Break

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TMZ has a special investigative report on underage Hollywood stars and their hard partying ways. The website has pictures and footage of several young celebrities like Lindsay Lohan, Mary Kate Olsen, Jesse McCartney and Frankie Muniz drinking and attending clubs they’re too young to get into. While this kind of partying is nothing new for hot teen stars like Lindsay and Mary Kate , who’s attendance gives any club a boost;  it’s a major coup for teen squirts McCartney and Muniz who probably have to tell their friends to "just go in without me" fairly often. We’d like to give both Jesse and Frankie the requisite high five for finally making it past the bouncer.  You go l’il bros!

Tom Cruise Lawsuit Refresher Course

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It’s being reported that Tom Cruise might be thinking about perhaps suing Life & Style and biographer Andrew Morton. Since it’s been a little while since Tom Cruise has sued anybody, I thought I would refresh your memory about  some of his lawsuits so you’ll be prepared for the new ones, should they indeed happen:

  • The wrestler: Cruise sued Chad Slater (an "erotic wrestler" who goes by the name Kyle Bradford) for $100 million. Verdict: Cruise wins (but not for full amount).
  • The sex coach: Cruise sued the Star tabloid for a story claiming they had "needed a sex coach for their steamy scenes in Stanley Kubrick’s film, Eyes Wide Shut." Verdict: settled, retraction printed.

Read more…

Is Rickur Having the Best Week Ever?

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We think Rickur, a small business owner from Lake Tahoe, might just be having the Best Week Ever. Why? Because he’s got the best blog on the internet.

If you love Best Week Ever’s blog but you feel it doesn’t provide enough pictures of meaty athletes and their "thick jock asses", then you’re gonna love Rickur’s Nutscratch Fever. While Rickur’s been changing most of the titles, he’s been filling up his blog with Best Week Ever’s scintillating content as if it were his own. The other 25% percent of the blog we unfortunately can’t take credit for.

Rickur, who’s interests include "wake boarding, vodcasting, progressive politics and pornography," may be having the best week ever now, but rest assured, next week he’ll be having the worst week ever when we sue the pants off of him!

While You Were Ingoring Your Co-Worker Who Always Quotes “Office Space”

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  • There’s apparently a new Paris Hilton sex tape floating around, this time with another woman.  I think it should be called "A Night In Paris 2: Lesbian Boogaloo".Paris_sex_tape
  • Golden Girls star Betty White was honored yesterday by the LA Zoo for her commitment to animals.  Meanwhile, Bea Arthur is still just a total party animal. 
  • The Bosh proposes a very disturbing question: if Kate Moss is pregnant, could Jack Osborne be the father?  For the sake of humanity, we hope not.
  • According to Page Six (seventh item), ABC producers prohibited Dancing With the Stars personality Drew Lachey from appearing on MadTV because they "weren’t thrilled with anyone on the show appearing in a parody of any  sort".  Dancing With the Stars is serious television, people. 
  • Jon Stewart is getting prepared for his big gig hosting this year’s Oscars.  Early reports are suggesting that Stewart’s witty Bush-bashing combined with a night of self-congratulatory award-whoring might result in severe back injuries among the Liberal Hollywood Elite from patting themselves so hard. 

LISTEN UP: Your Daily Dose of the Best Music Ever

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We’re mixing things up today…

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    Sugartown recently discovered that there’s more to Nancy Sinatra than "These Boots Are Made For Walkin’." Download "How Does That Grab You Darlin’?" before Jessica Simpson decides to cover it.
  • Today The Stepfather of Soul posted an amazing Little Milton song called "We’re Gonna Make It." If you like Otis Redding or James Brown it’s right up your alley.
  • Awesome Until Proven Guilty has a handful of tracks from today’s new releases, including "All She Wrote" by Ray Davies. You know, from the Kinks. The guy may be in his 60′s, but the old man knows what he’s doing. Check it out.
  • The guy over at Neiles Life decided to dig up his favorite old Butthole Surfers album and post a couple of his favorite tracks. Download "The Annoying Song," which is anything but.
  • Rodeo Town is featuring The Monroes, a female-fronted Dutch band that rocks out like it’s 1963. "Not Tonight" and "Sad And Blue" will get your juices flowing.
  • What happens when you mix together the lead singer of Phantom Planet, a horn section, and DJ Mark Ronson? The best Radiohead cover that Fluxblog has ever heard. Download "Just." Now.

SIZZLER: Meredith’s Real Life Man Trouble

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On Grey’s Anatomy, Ellen Pompeo’s character Meredith makes bad choices when it comes to men. Falling in love with a man she works with who’s also very married is by all accounts a bad idea.

But in real life, Ellen Pompeo may have even worse luck when it comes to men. According to the National Enquirer, Pompeo wants to marry her live-in love Chris Ivery. The down-and-out music producer, however, doesn’t want to marry her for fear of being overshadowed by her success. Oh and did we mention he served 14 months in a federal prison for postal  theft and credit card fraud?

Dr. Derek Shephard is looking pretty good right now.