The Most Loathsome People in America, 2005

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Loathsome_cruise 

What do Tom Cruise, Paris Hilton, Pat Robertson, George Bush, R. Kelly and Larry The Cable Guy have in common? No, they weren’t all partying together at the Playboy Mansion this weekend (… at least, I don’t think they were). Nope, they’re all on The Beast’s list of the 50 Most Loathsome People of 2005. Check out the entire thing here.

Noticeably absent? Star Jones, Tom Sizemore, and your ex-girlfriend. Check back next year.

This Day in Celebrity Conception

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Imagemain_sperm_egg1_1 
On this day in 1946, the parents of Suzanne Somers celebrated John Hancock day by procreating. 
Notorious, starring Cary Grant and Ingrid Bergman, was in the theaters, but Mr. and Mrs. Somers
only had eyes for each other. It's nice to imagine their enjoying a martini or two, listening to
"(I Love You) For Sentimental Reasons" by Nat King Cole, then mastering each other's thighs
the old-fashioned way, creating the star of Three's Company and that other show with Bobby Ewing.  
Also conceived today: Oscar Wilde (1854), Angela Landsbury (1925), Tim Robbins (1958)


			

Are Drugs Having the Best Week Ever?

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Happypills1_1

According to Cliff Arnall, a health psychologist at the University of Cardiff in Wales, today is the most depressing day of the year! Based on his formula 1/8W+(D-d)3/8xTQMxNA) January 23rd is "lowest emotional point of the year" for 2006.

But based on my formula (wellbutrin + klonipin + expired unknown horse pill in the medicine cabinet that may cause drowsiness + gin) it’s the float-i-est day of the year. 

Corn Flakes: Your Essential Inessentials

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Cornflakestest_m1

* Everybody hates Alicia?

* Luther Campbell: My lawyer made me do it.

* Outkast movie delayed. They never should have gotten Axl Rose to do the soundtrack.

* Deal or No Deal host Howie Mandel asks the big questions of life: "If I’m a game show host, will someone buy a ticket to see me do standup? If I’m a game show host, will I get an offer to do a dramatic role in a movie?" Answer: Yes!

* Jennifer Lopez gets on board the baby train. Maybe.

* Madonna splitting with Guy Ritchie? Maybe.

* Nicole Kidman splitting with Keith Urban? But wait, we thought they were getting engaged. Let us know soon so we’ll know what kind of candy to send.

Doug Benson’s “Marijuana-logues” On Sale NOW

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Marijuanalogues

Three stand-up comics presents a hilarious and provocative look at marijuana in a collection based on their 2004 Off-Broadway production The Marijuana-logues, which celebrates the "wisdom" of weed, along with new material that includes herben poetry and "high-ku," weed trivia, and more.

Click here to pick it up NOW. Quick! Do it before you forget what we were talking about.

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Today on Craig’s list, Bravo’s "Queer Eye For The Straight Guy" posted this notice: "Want Queer Eye to Makeover Your Office?? We are looking for a dynamic group of people who work together in an office that NEEDS HELP. … Groups must be fun, talkative and willing to have their business be a part of our show.  Feel free to turn other departments in, your boss in, or other businesses in.
This is a great marketing opportunity for your business and will be a blast for everyone involved. "

Weekend retreats, office parties and softball teams are a great way to boost company morale. But if you want a real corporate team-building experience, surprise your office with five uncomfortable gay stereotypes who will simultaneously point out your cubicle’s design flaws and your own sexual parameters.

Got Schrute?

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Dwight

Unless you hate joy, there is no reason not to be watching NBC’s sublime Thursday night show, The Office.  After managing to overcome monumental expectations established by the popularity of the original British version, The Office seems to have reached a nice cruising altitude, and is consistently one of the funniest, smartest and most innovative comedies on network televsion. 

The Office’s success can largely be attributed to its cast of talented, quirky performers – such as Rainn Wilson’s anal-retentive worker bee, Dwight Schrute.  Dwight’s awkward interactions with clueless boss Michael (Steve Carell) and taunting peers Jim (John Krasinski) and Pam (Jenna Fischer) are one of the show’s biggest strengths, and now you can get even more Schrute as "Dwight" is now blogging over at NBC’s surpisingly funny promotional site.

Just don’t let him find out that you’re reading his blog on company time.

Viral Marketing: Paul Abdul

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Chlamydia21

According to E! , Paula Abdul had to skip out on a press conference because she had an eye infection. Abdul apparently had a "really bad reaction to something" that caused the eye to swell. Get well soon!

57 Chanels and Nothing’s On

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Girls20matching20dresses20s1

From the LA Times: "The still-trembling House of Coco is about to be royally rocked by yet another Golden Globes dress debacle. Unconfirmed reports are surfacing that Portman’s so-called ‘vintage’ black lace Chanel frock worn to Monday’s Golden Globe Awards is another recent repeat. Embarrassingly, the same strapless Chanel frock may have been worn by Debra Messing to the 12th Annual Glamour Magazine Women of the Year Awards back in 2001." This is embarrassing, but on the other hand, matching dresses can be kind of cute.