While You Were Wishing You Were in Austin



  • The New York Times tries it’s best to base an article around Pete Wentz’s Internet exposure. But once again blogs trump print journalism.
  • Nicole Kidman questioned by FBI about phone calls with Tom Cruise. Apparently she crossed state lines with a nut job,
  • Bono gossips about world leaders to New York Daily News. After rivaling the career of Gandhi, he’d like to take on Cindy Adams.
  • If you weren’t invited to Katie Couric’s fundraiser for colonoscopy, according to FoxNews’ Roger Friedman, it might have to do with being not white.
  • Vin Diesel aims for respect of Hollywood by directing a trilogy written completely in the dead language of Punic. Why doesn’t he start by changing his name?
  • TV Guide thinks Kristin Cavellieri’s got real talent based on her guest starring roll on Veronica Mars. They also think that number 2 pencil’s performance was a tour de force.

…Of The Day


SADDAM HUSSEIN T-SHIRT SLOGAN: "I am the Head of State!" (Breitbart)

STARBUCKS RANT: The Kid from Brooklyn, who doesn’t understand why you’re paying $7 for a coffee and piece of pound cake. (Gawker)

IRONIC NEWS: Kid Rock is afraid of germs. Really Kid Rock? Really? You solely date porn stars. I mean, really?? (Contact Music)

EXCITING NERD NEWS: Filming on the Star Wars TV show is expected to start next year. Cynics are expected to announce that it sucks shortly thereafter. (Starpulse)

MP3: The Sopranos Megamix– Do The Malanga! (Download it here)




  • Young MC has sued a publishing company for failing to pay royalties for songs he wrote. The guy he’s suing is his best friend’s Harry’s brother Larry. Young has never respected that guy.
  • Sir Sean Connery is suing a country and golf club in America, claiming they used his name to boost business. Meanwhile, Daniel Craig is being considered as the spokesman for Putt-Putt.
  • Nick Lachey and Kristin Cavallari keep getting spotted together yet they keep insisting that they’re just friends. And we keep telling you about it.
  • Britney Spears was reportedly thinking of splitting with Kevin Federline until she found out that she was pregnant again. So it’s true: Having kids does save a marriage.
  • Desperate Housewives is set to shock fans with a lesbian storyline involving Bree Van De Kamp. Sounds like DH is ready to put on the leather jacket and skis.
  • "It sucks." That is Lindsay Lohan‘s reaction to the recent crackdown on underage drinking at LA clubs. I think this is a good thing. She already missed out on her childhood, she shouldn’t be deprived of having to get some guy outside the liquor store to buy her some Boone’s Farm like every other teenager.

Tribute to K-Fed: Yo Yo Now


I think K-Fed’s "PopoZao" is song of the year, hands down. In fact, it excited me so much, that I’ve decided that I want to be a hip-hop artist too. From now on, I will be known as J-Fed. My first single is inspired by "PopoZao" and it’s about the thing I love the most: spinning Yo-Yos. It’s fire!

Lyrics after the jump so you can rap along.

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GAMES: Deal or No Deal



We know you’ve been pining to be on Deal or No Deal, if just to flirt with pirate-cum-game show host Howie Mandel. While we can’t guarantee you a place on the show, we can provide you with a way to practice your deal-making skills (A.K.A guessing). Crapville hosts this no-frills adaptation, sans Mandel or the leggy briefcases. But before you play, make sure you’ve got some time on your hands because this computer version goes on forever, just like the real thing.

Are Robots Having the Best Week Ever?



You may be familiar with Isaac Asimov‘s first law of robots: They should not harm humans. Well, the United States government has never let a little thing like a law keep it from protecting its citizens. According to the Inquirer (via Slashdot), the United Sates army is deploying killer robots in Iraq. The robots, called SWORDS (Special Weapons Observation Reconnaissance Detection Systems), are equipped with either the M249, machine gun which fires 5.56-millimeter rounds at 750 rounds per minute or the M240, which fires 7.62-millimeter rounds at up to 1,000 per minute. Didn’t they see I, Robot? Okay, that’s a silly question. In any case, I think it’s a good idea to declare that robots are having the Best Week Ever. And on a personal note, I’d like to say that I’ve always loved robots and I would be glad to serve them in any capacity. Long live SWORDS, our exalted overlords!

BWE Photoshop Contest: Drunk Jakey G


Hey guys, it’s only a day old, but we’ve already gotten a ton of great Jake Gyllenhaal photoshop entries, like this one with a very pregnant (and thirsty) Katie Holmes.

Think you can do better? Well, then get your Jake cut-outs here and get started.

Email them to: BWEphotoshopContest@gmail.com.

And may the best Drunk Jakey G win.

Hef’s Girl Loves Her Some Lovitz



We here a Best Week Ever love to watch young love blossom; and today we were lucky enough to discover a relationship we didn’t even know existed. Kendra Wilkinson, the sporty, peroxide-blond girlfriend of Hugh Hefner currently starring in E!’s The Girls Next Door, seems to have sparked up a close friendship with SNL veteran Jon Lovitz.  One of three women belonging to the Playboy magnate, 20 year old Kendra seems to have started cozying up with Mr. Lovitz in February. How do we know? Take a look at this message Wilkinson left on Lovitz’s MySpace page.

2/18/2006 11:16 PM
that was a nice drive that we took after the party!!lololol!! you comin over tomorrow to have some fun with me??

In the past month, she’s left 3 more revealing messages that suggest Hef better watch his back. We’ve got them all after the jump…

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