While You Were Threatening to Issue a Presidential Veto


  • Lindsay_lohan_3
    Lindsay Lohan
    says she doesn’t want to be called a "teen queen." Coincidentally, neither does Aaron Carter. 
  • Pete Doherty has been photographed smoking crack just two short weeks after vowing to never do drugs again. This officially makes him the first drug addict in history to ever relapse. Bastard.
  • Britney Spears claims her singing voice is better ever since having a baby. America agrees that it’s cute Britney thinks we’ve ever cared about her voice.
  • Hugh Grant reportedly attacked a photographer with a manila folder. Hugh Grant: even his weapons of choice are wussy.
  • Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony may be ready to adopt. Fertility experts assume it’s because of Marc’s inability to deliver a decent Latin Explosion.
  • Donald Trump rips Martha Stewart a new one. The old one was torn to shreds in prison.

An Open Letter to Nick Lachey



Nick, I understand you’re asking for spousal support from Jessica. I’m here to tell you that that’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. Even though she was clearly the brains behind the whole Nick and Jessica phenomenon, you’re still extremely talented, and you have a long career ahead of you. Why in the world would you need more money than you will already make with your music, TV shows, and movies? Just make a clean break with her and move on to your next project. Otherwise, you’ll just seem greedy.

While You Were Thinking About Making Chicken For Dinner



  • George Clooney has dropped Teri Hatcher whom he was linked to the SAG awards in favor of Renee Zellwegger who spent the evening with him at the Bafta awards. Well, he’s got to take home something.
  • Would you recognize Axl Rose if you saw him an airport? Or would you mistake him for a regular at the airport bar?
  • Would you recognize Britney Spears if you saw her on a beach? Or would mistake her for your Great Aunt Rose?
  • Nobody wants this $365 million? Ok, then let me just get rid of it for you.
  • Gross Anatomy’s Ellen Pompeo is holding a bomb and this one might blow up in her face.
  • Some dude rips off our blog. We catch him and publicly flog him.
  • Tom Cruise loves to sue the pants off people. Anything to get their pants off.



HEADLINE:  "Florida Man Kills Roommate Over Toilet Paper" – We’ve all wanted to do it.  (AP)

RADIOHEAD SONG TITLE: The guys are recording a song for their new album called "Nude", which was actually written during the time they were making "OK Computer", but never released.  (NME)

WINDOWS ERROR: The world’s largest Windows Error Message appeared in Times Square.  Something tells me the building’s lobby didn’t have a "Ctrl-Alt-Delete" button.  (Network World)

AWESOME PRODUCT: Shoes specially designed for border-jumping immigrants.  (BBC)

PILLOW FIGHT: The giant one held last Saturday at Union Square here in NYC. (Brooklyn Vegan)

RANDOM BLOGFitted Sweats

DAY LATE STORY:  A family gave all seven of their kids presidential names.  (AP)

New Monty Python on PBS



Slashdot has the story that PBS will be airing six new Monty Python specials, each of which:

will focus on one member of the original
Monty Python troupe…and showcase favorite clips from the group’s
television series and movies, mixed with new footage. The five living Pythons…will each produce and write their own
episode, with the five collaborating on a sixth special to honor deceased
member [Graham] Chapman.

I know this could be one of those painful "why are they trampling on their legacy" deals, but against all good sense, I’m looking forward to this series.

GAMES: Attack of the Influenza Birds


Chicken__cartoon_4 Are you totally freaking out about the bird flu and the possibility that the cough you have is really a sign that your body is eating itself from the insides and you’ll soon turn into a zombie alongside the rest of the global population?

Here’s something that will make you feel better for a few minutes. In Attack of the Influenza Birds, you’ve got to shoot as many chickens infected with the H5N1 virus as possible and save the world. No pressure, though.




Now snake-free!

  • A yen for Yen: Japanese housewives are amassing secret fortunes.
  • Shirley MacLaine has yet another life. This time in Hollywood!
  • Boy George doesn’t believe in gay marriage, wants to be called Boy George W. 
  • How do you make money selling free Ricky Gervais podcasts? Volume.
  • Catherine Keener doesn’t want you in her green room, even if you do donate money to PBS.
  • Which will come first: Chinese Democracy or Indiana Jones? My money’s on Indy.
  • Is it too late to get our money back, Karyn Bosnak?

Lend Jon Stewart A Helping Hand



So Jon Stewart is getting ready to host the Oscars. Now, we here at Best Week Ever have no doubt that he will do a stellar job. He’s Jon Stewart. But we were hoping you could lend him a hand by writing out some jokes for this first timer. So who do you want him to go after? Should he pull a Chris Rock and attack Jude Law, or a David Letterman and harrass Uma Thurman? Should he pull a Billy Crystal and sing a song, or a Whoopi Goldberg and shave off his eyebrows? Again, totally your call.

After all that Jon Stewart’s done for you, it’s the least you can do. So leave your ideas in the comments section and who knows… maybe he’ll use your jokes at the big event (Assuming he reads this blog, of course.)

Frankie and Jessie Catch a Break



TMZ has a special investigative report on underage Hollywood stars and their hard partying ways. The website has pictures and footage of several young celebrities like Lindsay Lohan, Mary Kate Olsen, Jesse McCartney and Frankie Muniz drinking and attending clubs they’re too young to get into. While this kind of partying is nothing new for hot teen stars like Lindsay and Mary Kate , who’s attendance gives any club a boost;  it’s a major coup for teen squirts McCartney and Muniz who probably have to tell their friends to "just go in without me" fairly often. We’d like to give both Jesse and Frankie the requisite high five for finally making it past the bouncer.  You go l’il bros!