Thursday Morning Quick Hits

by

Jenny

Madonna avoids Mariah Carey at Live 8, depriving the world of a much wanted catfight.

If you order from Amazon.com
, your delivery person just might be Harrison Ford. Still waiting to find out if Chewie will be joining his side, this one last time…

Jenny McCarthy constantly erases tapes of herself having sex.

NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Only a handful of viewers are taking advantage
of the Cinderella Man refund.  Crowe resists the urge to throw phones at said viewers.

Dennis reaches hurricane strength; editors resist urge to include ‘menace’ in headline.

Bono calls Canadian Prime Minister "infuriating" for not making empty promises. PM tells Bono that Zooropa sucked ass.

Four London Blasts Kill 40, Injure 300

by

Xinsrc_562070207182276525361

LONDON – Three blasts rocked the London subway and one tore open a
packed double-decker bus during the morning rush hour Thursday, sending
bloodied victims fleeing in what a shaken Prime Minister Tony Blair
called "barbaric" terrorist attacks. A U.S. law enforcement official
said at least 40 people were killed and London hospitals reported more
than 300 injured The U.S. official spoke on condition of
anonymity because British officials have yet to make public the death
toll. U.S. authorities learned of the number from their British
counterparts, according to the official.[continue reading...]

1)BBC Live News Feed .

2)London Blast time line (bbc article)

3) BBC collection of pictures thus far.

4) London underground map

War of the Worlds: Behind the Scenes Exclusive

by

Cruise_1

What’s scarier, the new summer blockbuster War of the Worlds, or seeing Tom Cruise freak out about Scientology on the Today Show ("Matt! Matt! You don’t understand!")? The answer: they’re both pretty flippin’ scary.

But how much do you really know about the Steven Spielberg/Tom Cruise vehicle? That’s where we, at the National Lampoon, come in. Hell, we’re a plethora of useless knowledge and facts. We’re also extreme, compulsive liars. Regardless, we thought that you—oh dear reader—should learn a little bit more about the new summer blockbuster, War of the Worlds!

I….uh…I did not know that.[link]

Bonus quick linkage:

The Ridiculously Thorough Guide to Making Your Own Pizza

Girlfriend Fight Simulator

Road House DVD review: "Grab your mullet it’s Road House Time" (maybe the greatest Road House Review ever…well it would be if there were a bunch of reviews of this dvd.)

Think you rocked at the game Monopoly as a child? Play Monopoly Live in London.

Anyone else miss the video footage of a the Akron deer office space run? See the video here.

Wednesday Quick Hits

by

Mdf602252

Angelina Jolie adopts an Ethiopian orphan. Oh really? Well, if you call within the next 30 minutes to adopt me, Ms. Jolie. We’ll even throw in a FREE Sport Illustrated Football Phone!  Operators are standing by…(the time is now)

London
gets the 2012 Olympics.  France surrenders.

Colonel Mustard, in the senior citizen’s center, with a candlestick.

Britney
wants to rush a new album to stores cause Cletus Federline has spent all her money.

Prince Albert
admits he had a child with a stewardess, also admits it would have been better to put it in her can…

Martha Stewart claims her prison nickname was ‘M. Diddy’ after constructing a lace-lined escape tunnel using a single punch ladle.