Final Fantasy XII Preview



Final Fantasy XII
was announced almost four years ago…and today, it’s still a nebulous,
uncertain question mark looming on the gaming horizon. There’s no
question it will be huge — if it ever ships. Until now, there’s been
no guarantee that FFXII would actually see the light of day; after its
bold, dramatic demo at E3 2004 (which received mixed reviews), the game
vanished into mystery. Surrounded by rumor, beset by massive personnel
changes and dogged by skepticism among the staunchest Final Fantasy
maniacs, FFXII has a lot to answer for.

Let me say that FFVII was the reason i bought a PSI back in the day and FFX was the reason I bought a PS2. If XII sees the light of day, I sure know I wont…for at least 4 days.[1UP POST] and [new trailer here

Thursday Morning Quick Hits



Carly Simon, who’d said subject of "You’re So Vain" contains an A, E
and R, claims it’s not Mick Jagger or Warren Beatty, for those of you
scoring at home; Christopher Walken, Darth Vader, Bea Arthur still in

Michael Jackson
enters ladies’ roomEVERYBODY PANIC!

Former former Baywatch star Brooke Burns hospitalized for broken neck
after diving into a pool
. Apparently Mitch had left to go find Hobie,
who had sneaked off to go jet skiing with friends.

Xzibit Is A Really Good Actor,’ Aniston Says As He Holds Gun To Her Head.

For those waiting for a film drama about 9-11 starting Adam Sandler your wait will soon be over.

Miss America contest moving to Las Vegas — so losers can immediately start their jobs as strippers.

Shoe designer donates special hi-tops to illegal migrants – complete
with compass, flashlight, map of the border, and a Roo-style pocket for
pain relievers.

Martha Stewart sued by jury consultant, because stiffing your client of $74,000 is not a good thing.

Kimberly Stewart Engaged….again…to LB’s Talan?



ET has confirmed that KIMBERLY STEWART is engaged to "Laguna Beach"
cast member TALAN TORRIERO. The 26-year-old daughter of rocker ROD
STEWART recently split from "Girls Gone Wild" producer JOE FRANCIS. She
was previously engaged to musician CISCO ADLER back in autumn of 2004.
No word yet on a wedding date for Kimberly and Talan.

I give the engagement 2 months and I give two weeks for Paris to pounce. Place your bets people.[et story ]

Trapped In The Closet: Cliffs Notes



Is Trapped In The Closet a little too hard for you to follow? Naturally. Well, the guys over at SomethingAwful have put together a Cliffs Notes– or Thorpe’s Notes– version of it. Because when you have hyperventilating midgets, gun toting ex-cons, homosexual clergymen, a spatula wielding nosey neighbor, and a whole bunch of marital infidelities, sometimes you need to have things cleared up.

Check out the Notes here.

And in case you missed them, here are the Notes for Chapters 1-5.

Family Guy: Death to America



Leave it to Family Guy to push the envelope once again. Who knew OBL had such a hard time getting through one of his videos? Well, this just goes to show you that it doesn’t matter who, what, or where you are– once you get a case of the giggles, it’s almost impossible to stop.

Watch the video here.

Wednesday Quick Hits – Ladies Only



Eva Mendes has vowed never to wear fur again. Alright, that’s a start. Now step two: Get Eva Mendes to vow never to wear clothes again.

Jennifer Aniston has been named GQ’s Man of the Year. And it finally makes sense why Brad dumped her.

On The Tyra Banks Show, Tyra blamed the media for her 14-year-long feud with Naomi Campbell. Naomi Campbell then blamed Tyra for being such a bitch. Tyra shot back "I don’t think so, girlfriend!" Then they got into a big old cat fight on stage that only ended when they started making out. Well, that’s how it played out in my mind.

Mariah Carey has allegedly asked toymakers to produce 300 "miniature Mariah" dolls. She plans on handing them out to all 300 people who actually saw Glitter.

Chelsea Clinton has been hanging out with Tara Reid. In a related story, Bill Clinton still hasn’t returned his copy of "American Beauty."

And finally, a San Bernadino woman still plans to marry the man who shot her in the groin and then held her hostage for six days. Because love is blind. And really, really stupid.

Paul Scheer is Trapped in the Closet



For everyone out there making DVD commentaries, I have one word for you, “STOP!”

There is absolutely no way anyone can top the pure insanity of R. Kelly candidly watching and talking about his Hip-Hop Opera “Trapped in the Closet” on his newly released compilation DVD. Seriously, this is why DVD commentaries were invented. [keep reading]

If you love Trapped in the Closet as much as we do, you have to read Paul’s take on the R. Kelly masterpiece. Because watching R. Kelly watch Trapped in the Closet is "like God watching a video of the 1st 12 days of Earth."

I couldn’t have said it any better myself.

Also, check out Paul’s site for brand new video updates. Rock on.

Laguna Beach Finale– Recap!



Did you miss the Laguna Beach finale last night? Of course you didn’t. Well, just in case you know somebody who did miss it, send them over to TVGasm for the recap.

Full Laguna recap here. When you’re done wiping the tears from your face, let’s talk about LC’s upcoming show The Hills. Can’t. Wait. For. That.