Oh Joaquin Phoenix, you sound just like us during a fight. “You know what? You’re right. I suck. I suck so much, nothing I do or say matters and now you have to feel bad for me.” Yeah, we are the worst to fight with, which is why we’re doubly glad it’s Joaquin and not us that had to make a statement regarding the hilariously negative comments he mad about the Oscars last month. “I’m just saying that I think it’s bulls—. I think it’s total, utter bulls—, and I don’t want to be a part of it,” The Master star scoffed in Interview. His publicist must have had a stroke after the interview was published, because now Joaquin is attempted to walk back his statements via the Sydney Morning Herald. ”But I know that first of all, I wouldn’t have the career that I have if it weren’t for the Oscars. I haven’t been in a lot of movies that have made a lot of money,” he admitted. “And getting nominated for a movie has probably helped my career tremendously.” So would the Oscars please start replying to his texts already?
Joaquin also sighs, “I guess I sound like a dick,” which is just delightful. “But in some ways it’s the antithesis of what you want to be as an actor,” he says of awards season. “You’re always trying to free yourself of the artifice, which is really difficult. Especially when you suck, like me.” Oh jeez, Joaquin. Save the self-deprecation for your mama. You are no Jennifer Lawrence and you never will be!
[Photo: Getty Images]
Phew! For a second there we thought we had a Secret Gibson* on our hands. Justin Timberlake had maintained an uncomfortable radio silence until now about that leaked homeless video made by his friend Justin Huchel for the Biel/Timberlake wedding. We knew we shouldn’t have doubted him so quickly! Timberlake posted an incredibly thoughtful apology letter to his website, the care and detail of which should be a template for other celebrity apologies. Seriously, TMZ should just have a PDF available for download at all times. So why was Justin’s apology such a baller one? Well, let’s see…
1) Justin didn’t actually know about the tape: Thank god, right? “I had no knowledge of its existence. I had absolutely ZERO contribution to it,” he clarifies. “Like many silly rumors that I have been made aware of about the week: It was NOT shown at my wedding.”
After the publication of Paris Hilton’s embarrassingly offensive comments that gay Grindr users are “disgusting” and “probably have AIDS,” the heiress knew she had some serious explaining to do. Following the standard protocol for any celeb caught making homophobic remarks, Hilton apologized via GLAAD.
“As anyone close to me knows, I always have been and always will be a huge supporter of the gay community, she said. “I am so sorry and so upset that I caused pain to my gay friends, fans and their families with the comments heard this morning.”
At the same time, Paris also clarifies that she never meant her comments to be statements about the entire gay community. “I was having this private conversation with a friend of mine who is gay, and our conversation was in no way towards the entire gay community. It is the last thing that I would ever want to do, and I cannot put into words how much I wish I could take back every word.”
But she also doesn’t make too many excuses for herself, expressing contrition for making light of HIV/AIDS. “HIV/AIDS can hurt anyone, gay and straight, men and women. It’s something I take very seriously and should not have been thrown around in conversation,” she said. “Gay people are the strongest and most inspiring people I know. It is so wrong when people bully or put down others for being gay. No one should have to go through that.”
Good on you, Paris. Now we hope she also turns her words into action and makes this into an opportunity to do something to stop others from making hateful comments.
[Photo: Getty Images]
When we heard the profanity-laced, creatively insulting voicemail Chevy Chase left for Community boss Dan Harmon, we were slightly torn: On the one hand, Chase is pretty mean to Harmon in the message; on the other, this supposedly came after Harmon led a chant of “F— Chevy” at a party in front of the actor’s wife and daughter. Also, the audience laughter accompanying the voicemail seems pretty humiliating for Chase. Apparently, a whole lot of people on the Internets agreed, and Harmon took to his Tumblr yesterday with a sort of apology for allowing the whole thing to leak to the world.
“[A]s a guy who blogs or tweets every time he wipes his butt, hugs his cat or hurts his girlfriend, it’s conspicuously weird of me to say nothing at all about the giant fart with my name on it that you’ve been inhaling,” Harmon wrote, explaining that he played the voicemail for a monthly live show he does at a comic book store in L.A. “It was in that venue, months ago, that I made the horrible, childish, self-obsessed, unaware, naive and unprofessional decision to play someone’s voicemail to me. He didn’t intend for 150 people to listen and giggle at it, and I didn’t intend for millions of people to read angry reports about it.
“That was a dumb, unclassy, inconsiderate move on my part. I’m very sorry it’s reflecting poorly on the show,” he continued. Read more…
In the age of Twitter, it’s pretty amazing that more celebrities aren’t putting their foot in it these days. But enough of our favorite (or least favorite) actors, musicians and other public figures managed to say and do the kind of awful things that simultaneously give publicists strokes and keep them in business. After those awful things come the kind of public apologies that make us cringe, squirm and thank god we’re not in their shoes. From Chris Brown to Gilbert Gottfried, Arnold Schwarzenegger to Lea Michele, Hilary Swank to Mythbusters, we had a lot of Schadenfreude to enjoy in 2011. We’re pretty sure the culprits would like us to forget these moments, but here’s a little gallery to remind you:
Did we leave out one of your faves? Share it in the comments!
[Photos: NBC, Getty Images]