by (@hallekiefer)

Joseph Gordon-Levitt Apologizes For “Pretty Girls Aren’t Funny” Comment, But In Case He Needs A Refresher…

Joseph Gordon-Levitt Apologizes For "Pretty Girls Aren't Funny"

For someone who declared “most pretty girls aren’t funny” recently, Joseph Gordon-Levitt is doing a pretty good job of not making us want to bang our skulls against a pile of Margaret Cho DVDs. The Dark Knight Rises actor allegedly blurted out that factually inaccurate statement at the Looper panel at Comic-Con while talking about costar Emily Blunt, but has since offered an explanation. “I’m actually glad you asked me about that, because I was embarrassed,” he told a reporter for Yahoo’s OMG. “Sometimes the words come out really wrong, and sometimes the words come out really wrong in front of thousands of people. I do apologize.” We should hope so, JGL! You’re friends with Zooey Deschanel! You’ve seen New Girl! You should know better!

So what was Joseph trying to get across? “In our culture, girls do tend to get pigeonholed,” he explains. “And I was trying and failing to pay [Blunt] a compliment about the fact that she really succeeded in avoiding those traps and not getting pigeonholed, and even though she’s a very good looking young women she is so funny and plays such a badass and a strong woman in Looper.” We’ll accept your explanation, JGL, but mainly because we still want to see Looper. In the meantime, in case you need a refresher course on how attractive women are capable of saying funny things, please take a moment to look through our Funniest Lady In Film This Summer gallery, where women from Anna Farris to Rashida Jones, Elizabeth Banks to Mila Kunis will remind you how exactly it is done.

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by (@hallekiefer)

The Game Apologizes, Won’t Go To Jail For Tweeting The Deets

Tweeting the deets is not a crime…yet. Despite the hundreds of calls that flooded into the Compton sheriff’s station, The Games’ Twitter prank won’t have the rapper carving a tweet out of a bar of soap anytime soon. In fact, The Game visited CNN to apologize and well, um, blame his friend. “It was a simple mishap,” the rapper, real name Jayceon Taylor, explained. “I was doing a photo shoot, and it was downtown Los Angeles, and one of my boys picked up my phone and started tweeting random numbers.” The fact that The Game’s friend managed to “randomly” type in the sheriff’s station phone number makes us think he might a robot. Then again, there’s nothing illegal about being a robot…yet.

Luckily the Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department accepted his apology. “His willingness to help share with the media and the community that the safety of the public is what is most important, is a great message,” the department spokesperson said. “Based upon our investigation, as well as consultation with the Los Angeles County District Attorney’s Office, the LASD considers the criminal investigation into this matter closed. The Los Angeles County Sheriff’s Department will not be seeking criminal charges.” The Game is free to tweet another day! He really needs to keep an eye on his robot friend though. A very close eye.

by (@hallekiefer)

Crystal Harris (Sort Of) Apologizes For Hugh Hefner Sex Comments

Look, if anyone is being interviewed about sleeping with a thousand year-old-man, they should to get the pertinent information out first: who, what, where, why and how did you not barf while you were doing it? After making some less than flattering comments about Hugh Hefner’s sex skills to Howard Stern, Hef’s ex-fiance Crystal Harris apologized…at least for making said statements out loud. “The Stern interview scared me, he’s harsh,” the former Playboy model tweeted last night. “I was unprepared and blurted out things I shouldn’t have said, I’m sorry.” Oh, do you think so, Crystal? This is like if someone slept with Golem, then complained that he was awful in the sack. No one cares about his technique, girl; they just want a detailed explanation of why you did it in the first place.

Not that Hugh has been sitting around silently massaging his gums with Polident while Crystal insults his wiener on national radio. “Yes, I think Crystal told Howard Stern what he wanted to hear. That’s her MO with most everyone,” Hef’s Twitter read last night. “I don’t blame Howard. Crystal shouldn’t have been booked on the show at this sensitive time.” Have a heart, girl. At least give the bottle of baby oil time to cool first.

by (@hallekiefer)

Tracy Morgan Apologizes For Anti-Gay Jokes With Nashville Press Conference

Man, if only Tracy Morgan hadn’t made those anti-gay jokes, we could just be loving him unreservedly like we were before. Following Tracy Morgan’s rant two weeks ago, the 30 Rock star is at least returning to Nashville to apologize for his homophobic riffing. Seeing as how the comedian apologized a few days after the incident, Tracy Morgan’s GLAAD press conference, which also included audience member Kevin Rogers, was yet another opportunity to confirm: yup, it was still a truly horrible bit. “I want to apologize to my friends, my family and my fans,” Morgan said. “I didn’t know. I didn’t mean it and that’s how I feel about it. I don’t have a hateful bone in my body. I don’t believe that anyone that should be bullied or, just, made to feel bad about who they are. I totally feel that in my heart.” Especially not if they are shelling out 80 bones for the privilege.

Despite his comments Morgan has his share of supporters, including Melissa Leo, Louis C.K. and most recently Joan Rivers, who told The Daily Beast, “He shouldn’t apologize. Gay fans? What are they doing seeing him anyhow? Why aren’t they watching me and Kathy Griffin?” Or after that quote, probably just Kathy Griffin. “I pride myself of…18 years of stand-up, of using it to heal people, and not to hurt,” Morgan continued, concluding his statement by sayung, “To err is human, but to forgive is divine…Thank you for forgiving me.” Guess Tracy will just have to wait and see if his fan base is ready to accept his mea cupla.

by (@hallekiefer)

Melissa Leo Defends Tracy Morgan’s Comedy Skills

In case you’re wondering what kind of people those were who cheered his anti-gay bit, Melissa Leo defends Tracy Morgan following his homophobic rant on-stage in Nashville. “I witnessed Tracy very upset by being misunderstood, and the best comfort to him seemed to be that comedy is the most difficult [skill] of what we do,” said the Academy-Award-winning star of The Fighter, and Tracy’s current co-star in Predisposed. “And comedy in the theatrical arts presses boundaries and asks questions and puts things in people’s faces. The cat I’m working with up the river is a very fine man with the best intentions. And yeah, he likes to push an envelope, without a doubt.” Tracy sure is pushing the envelope alright. The envelope that has his 30 Rock contract in it, and he’s slowly pushing it towards the garbage.

Despite the fact that Tracy Morgan’s apology seemed to indicate even he didn’t know what he was talking about, Leo’s Oscars swearing mishap apparently means the actress feels his pain. “Golly, I’ll live the rest of my life with a four-letter cuss word that we all use, in a moment that was beyond my wildest dreams, so there you go,” she exclaimed. Accidentally swearing on live television and accidentally claiming you’ll stab your son are two distinct and separate thing.

[Photo: /Splash News Online]

by (@hallekiefer)

Tracy Morgan Supports Gay Marriage, Admits He Says “Really Stupid S–t”

Tracy Morgan’s homophobic rant marked a low point in the 30 Rock star‘s public career, but he wants everyone to know that he’s committed to making amends, provided it does not require him to put his shirt back on. Tracy Morgan apologized last Friday following the tirade, but sat down with Russell Simmons yesterday to clarify how sorry he really is. “I guess the reason I am successful is because I am so unfiltered. And sometimes as a result I say really stupid s–t,” Morgan told Simmons during his GlobalGrind interview. “The truth is if I had a gay son, I would love him just as much as if he was straight … I might have to try to love even more because I know of the difficulty that he would have in society.”

Russell didn’t ask, nor did Tracy try to explain, exactly what he was going for with the bit, but says that in the future he has to “think of some funny s–t, not some s–t that gets me knocked upside my head.” Tracy Morgan and GLAAD will partner and return to Tennessee next week for a press conference protesting the “Don’t Say Gay” bill, which would make it illegal for teachers to discuss homosexuality prior  “I’m sorry for what I said. I didn’t mean it. I never want to use my comedy to hurt anyone. My family knew what it was like to feel different. My brother was disabled and I lost my father to AIDS in 1987,” the comedian told E! Online. “My dad wasn’t gay, but I also learned about homophobia then because of how people treated people who were sick with that. Parents should support and love their kids no matter what. Gay people deserve the same right to be happy in this country as everyone else. Our laws should support that.” As Morgan told Simmons, “I am deeply sorry for the comments I made. What I am most sad about is the comments I made about kids and bullying. I believe everyone deserves the right to be happy and marry who they want too; gay, white, black, male or female. Let me know where the rally’s at Russ.” You’ll recognize him when you get there. He’ll be the half-naked one wielding the light saber.

[Photo: Splash News Online]

by (@hallekiefer)

Avril Lavigne Apologizes For Pulling An Avril Lavigne At A Tampa Rays Game

Oh angry Avril Lavigne, it’s like we’re in 2002 again, back when you had your wee little ties and Manic Panic-streaked hair and zip-up hoodies…okay, well, maybe not that much has changed since then. That being said, unlike the actions of the skate-pop princess a decade ago, Avril Lavigne swearing at a Tampa Devil Rays game this Saturday was immediately followed by an apology, rather than a lot of silent eye-rolling and heaving sighs like we would have expected. After the crowd started to boo Lavigne during a break caused by a technical difficulty, Avril snarled that such things “f–king happen on a baseball field.” Avril then slammed every door in Tropicana Stadium and screamed for her mom to get out of her room already.

On Sunday, the Rays chided Lavigne’s potty-mouth, saying “The Rays demand profanity-free performances from all of our concert performers and we are extremely disappointed by the language used in last night’s show.” Later Avril apologized for the profanity to the crowd, explaining, “We just had so much fun tonight and we want to take the tirade out and say thank you to the Tampa Bay Rays! I’m truly sorry if anyone was offended by my language.” Avril then purchased everything in an entire Hot Topic, because girlfriend isn’t that mature.

[Photo: Splash News Online]

by (@hallekiefer)

Mickey Rourke Apologizes For Calling His Film With Megan Fox “Terrible”

You know how when it’s noisy at a party and you get cranky, you just start trash-talking the stars of Transfomers? If we’re feeling ornery, you wouldn’t believe the nasty things we’ll say about Shia LeBouf. Now after Rourke insulted Megan Fox and the “terrible” movie they have coming out this week, Mickey Rourke apologized for Passion Play insults he spouted to New York Mag. “When I talked to you, I was at a party,” he explained on Thursday. “It was loud and crowded, I was in a s—ty mood and I was trying to get rid of your reporter. Mitch [Glazer, Passion Play director] is one of my best friends since we were kids. I loved working with him and would do it again tomorrow.” We’re sure once Mitch hears your excuse, he won’t be able to say no! Or he won’t be able to say no because the film doesn’t open until May 6. Either way, that movie still looks awful.

No mention on whether Mickey regrets his comments about 13, his movie with 50 Cent, so we’re guessing the volume of the crowd didn’t affect his perception that it’s “a really bad movie.” Says the star of The Wrestler, “I don’t know why I said that stupid shit. I love Mitch, I love Megan. My bad.” We actually appreciate Rourke’s honesty. In the future, he shouldn’t talk to reporters unless he’s in the middle of a quiet, empty space. A drained municipal pool, perhaps? The Grand Canyon? We’d hate to see what Mickey would say if someone managed to corner him at the Olympics.

[Photo: Image Entertainment]

by (@hallekiefer)

Ashley Judd Apologizes for Calling Rap, Hip-Hop The “Soundtrack Of Misogyny”

We’re willing to cut Ashley Judd a lot of slack, considering Judd’s memoir All That Is Bitter & Sweet paints a pretty gruesome portrait of the abuse the actress had to deal with as an adolescent. Nonetheless, it was pretty big misstep for Judd to call rap and hip-hip misogynistic; that’s like saying all country western singers are redheads named Naomi. “As far as I’m concerned,” Judd wrote in her book. “Most rap and hip-hop music — with its rape culture and insanely abusive lyrics and depictions of girls and women as ‘ho’s’ — is the contemporary soundtrack of misogyny.” Oh Ashley, we want to let this one slide completely, but how much rap and hip-hop are you listening to every year? That was written in the last decade?

Even The Roots’ ?uestlove added his two cents about the ensuing kerfuffle. “At least i got my answer as to why ash Judd didn’t give us so much as a nod on her last visit,” ?uestlove tweeted about Judd. “EVERY genre of music has elements of violence.” After her Twitter blew up with fans and detractors alike, Judd apologized on Global Grind, Russell Simmons‘ site. “I have looked closely at the feedback I have received about those two paragraphs, and absolutely see your points,” Ashley posted. “And I fully capitulate to your rightness, and again humbly offer my heartfelt amends for not having been able to see the fault in my writing, and not having anticipated it would be painful for so many.” Judd then couldn’t help but add, “My equivalent genres, as an Appalachian, an oppressed and ridiculed people, would be mountain music and bluegrass.” Everyone then quietly backed away from their keyboard, because it was just not worth getting into again.

by (@hallekiefer)

Chris Brown Feels Like A “Damn Fool” Still Apologizing For Rihanna Incident

Oh, wow, Chris Brown is really mad at us, you guys. In an interview with Page Six, Chris Brown says he’s done apologizing for assaulting Rihanna in 2009; he’s more concerned with how everyone turned their back on him after what he terms a “mishap.” “The last two years, everybody dissed me, but my fans were so dedicated,” Brown complained, only a month after Rihanna asked Brown’s restraining order be lifted. “[People] don’t want to get involved with it because they don’t want their name attached to anything negative. Unknowingly, they kind of show their true colors when they do that.” Oh gosh, do you think a flower arrangement is enough of a “We’re Sorry We Didn’t Call After You Beat Your Girlfriend?” gift? Or maybe we should we go for a muffin basket instead?

Chris Brown’s nude photos also popped up online this week, but the singer was more interested in talking about how people reacted to something that happened over two years ago. “People are always gonna talk. But I’m in a positive place… You can’t blame people for how they want to be portrayed or if they don’t want to be associated with somebody who had a particular mishap,” Brown explains. “At the end of the day, if I walk around apologizing to everybody, I’m gonna look like a damn fool.” Hey, chin up, Chris! Keep on giving interviews like this and you’re going to look like a fool no matter what.