Bikini Pictures

by (@katespencer)

This Is Not Natural

heidi-montag-barbie

What is left to say about Heidi Montag‘s deformed and inflated body? It appears that her plastic surgeon sliced out her happiness when he was scooping out Heidi’s back fat, ‘cuz she now looks like the world’s most miserable blow up sex doll. But hey, we guess she paid all that money to get chopped up into a tinier, bustier robot so she could sit around in a bikini all day, so this must be what she considers success. Congrats on all you’ve accomplished, Heidi! So what if you scare small children with your canon ball breasts in the process.

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[Photo: Splash News Online]

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Audrina Patridge Works In A Bikini

Audrina Patridge

Laugh all you want, Audrina Patridge haters, but when was the last time you were paid to soak in a hot tub? The bikini-clad Hills star hosted a party at the Wet Republic in Las Vegas Saturday. Beats working, right? Only, this is work for Miss Patridge. Hate on or celebrate with the lady in the gallery below—we’re just glad a shirtless Ryan Cabrera wasn’t blocking the view.

[Photos: Splash News Online]

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by (@katespencer)

Kim’s Life Is One Big Poolside Vacation

Kim Kardashian

Apparently Kim Kardashian has a career where she does stuff to earn actual paper money (Monopoly money doesn’t count). What that career entails we aren’t sure, because the girl spends most of her time staging fake photo shoots at various pools around the greater Miami area. Seriously – who sits like this, ever? The last time we were poolside we covered ourselves in SPF 45 and hid under an Old Navy straw hat while we prayed no one noticed our bathing suit was from our high school days. Kim Kardashian makes us hate ourselves.

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[Photo: Splash News Online]

by (@katespencer)

Beauty And The Beast Hit Up The Beach

katy-perry-bikini

Did we just call Russell Brand a beast? Sorry about that. It’s just that’s he’s so…wet in these pictures, and it’s just not doing it for us. We never thought we’d say we prefer it when he wears tank tops, skinny jeans and flops, but blegh, apparently we do.

Russell and his fiance, Katy Perry, are enjoying some off time down in Mexico and sunbathed in matching red ensembles. Katy was practically popping out of her top, which Russell could barely keep his swimsuit on his butt. We have yet to figure out what made these two click, but perhaps it’s that neither one can stay in their clothes?

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[Photo: Splash News Online]

by (@katespencer)

Victoria’s Secret Celebrates 15 Years Of Creating A PG-Rated Nudie Mag

Victoria's Secret Models Bikini Pictures

Congratulations Victoria’s Secret! The company recently celebrated 15 years of their swimwear catalog, with a party in Los Angeles and a poolside fete featuring Miranda Kerr, Candice Swanepoel and Alessandra Ambrosio (pictured) in bikinis. We’d like to take this moment to honor Victoria’s Secret for making strides in creating masturbation material suitable for experimenting 11-year-old boys across the globe. Here’s to another 15 years of catalogs that spend most of their existence hidden under pubescent pillows. Bravo!

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[Photo: Splash News Online]

by (@katespencer)

Sometimes It’s Easy To Forget Kelly Bensimon Is Cray-Cray

Kelly Bensimon

Hey, wait a second. If you strip away the drama and the crazy, Kelly Bensimon is actually…sexy!? Could this be possible? The – what is she exactly – MILTLABNF (Mom I’d like to look at but not f*ck) was spotted hanging out poolside in Miami, and is insanely ripped in the abs department (or is just genetically advanced). It’s easy to forgot the looniness she lays down on The Real Housewives of NYC when blinded by her good looks. If Ramona looked this fierce without any clothes on, would it be easy to ignore her insanity too? (God, we hope not.)

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[Photo: Splash News Online]

by (@seapeaz)

Francia Raisa Skates Around Cali In Her Bikini

francia-almendarez-main

Francia Raisa Almendarez, best known for starring in the hit series The Secret Life of the American Teenager, skated around Santa Monica, California this weekend sporting a pink bikini top and short black shorts. Despite playing a 16 year old majorette on her show, Francia is really 21 years old. Check out more photos of this Latina bombshell below. [Photo: Splash News Online]

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by (@seapeaz)

Bikini Wars: Maria Belen Rodriguez Vs. Coleen Rooney

It’s grey and gloomy today in New York City and although spring is so close we can feel it taunting our sinuses, warm weather is still so far away. We’ve scoured the internet for an escape, hoping to travel vicariously through some other way bigger, way better, and way more famous person. Unfortunately, all of our bikini loving celebs are hiding their perfect bikini bods so…we turned abroad and stumbled upon UK Star, Coleen Rooney and Argentinian actress, Maria Belen Rodriguez. Check out these hot bikini babes in our gallery below and vote on who you think is hotter. We’ve got our own opinion (cough Maria cough), but we want to hear what you think!

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Whitney Port: Boring Even In A Bikini

whitney_port

While there’s no arguing that “The City” star Whitney Port has enviable abs and mile-long legs, these creepy from-the-bushes paparazzi shots defy all “hot girl in a bikini” odds and bore the crap out of us. Maybe we’re just cranky and jealous of the Miami sunshine. Maybe we’re just sick of all the “Hills” offspring. Either way, yaaawn. [Photos: Splash News]

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Modern Family‘s Julie Bowen Busts Out Her Bikini

Julie Bowen

The cast of Modern Family must be feeling pretty good right now: not only did they get some good buzz for last night’s “Oscar charades” promo, but the cast is currently filming an episode in Hawaii—how many sitcoms get to do that in winter? We don’t know when it will air, but judging from these bikini pictures of star Julie Bowen, we expect it will contain plenty of MILF jokes. See her scamper in the gallery below.

[Photos: Splash News Online]

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