Celebrity Apprentice

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While The Other Jacksons Are Fighting, La Toya Jackson Gets Her OWN Reality Show

La Toya Jackson Gets Her Own Show

There’s some good news from the Jackson family after all the bickering amongst MJ’s kids and siblings. La Toya Jackson has landed her OWN reality show, Life with La Toya, set to premiere in 2013. Now we know why she has managed to stay away from all of the Jackson family shenanigans. Can’t mess up the once in a lifetime chance to have her own show on Oprah’s network, now can she? Read more…

by (@JordanRuntagh)

Donald Trump Shares His Beauty Tips

Today is a day we’ll never forget. Why, you ask? Because it’s the day that Donald Trump has bestowed his hair-care secrets onto the world. For the first time ever, the Don gave a detailed account of his beauty routine in a recent interview with Rolling Stone. We’ll tell our grandkids about this someday. If you want to have a luscious helmet-esque lion’s mane like his, all you have to do is follow his simple steps!

“OK, what I do is, wash it with Head and Shoulders,” he spilled (note to self: buy stock in Head and Shoulders), “I don’t dry it, though. I let it dry by itself. It takes about an hour. Then I read papers and things… I also watch TV. I love Fox, I like Morning Joe, I like that the Today Show did a beautiful piece on me yesterday.” Reading about yourself is a crucial step, but if you’re not being covered by any major media outlets, googling yourself works just fine.

“OK, so I’ve done all that. I then comb my hair. Yes, I do use a comb. Do I comb it forward? No, I don’t comb it forward.” Damn it, THAT’S where we went wrong all those years! “I actually don’t have a bad hairline. When you think about it, it’s not bad. I mean, I get a lot of credit for comb-overs. But it’s not really a comb-over. It’s sort of a little bit forward and back. I’ve combed it the same way for years. Same thing, every time.” And there you have it; one of the greatest follicle fashion enigmas of our time has been unraveled. And now that the mystery is gone, we can’t help but feel a little sad.

[Photo: Images]

by (@hallekiefer)

The Donald Announces His Lohan-Free Celebrity Apprentice Cast

The new cast of Celebrity Apprentice has been announced, and in case you thought her 2011 would go any differently than her 2010 (note: no one thought that), unfortunately Donald Trump rejected Lindsay Lohan from the cast. According to Trump, “[The Lohans] approached me, and we did talk about it. It’s just not the right time. Lindsay has to straighten herself out first. And I know Dina, she’s a really lovely woman. I don’t think she gets very much credit – she’s tried. I know Michael a little bit. It could happen in the future, but right now we need to see Lindsay get straightened out.” Hmm, and here Dina Lohan claimed the show’s producers approached Lindsay earlier this year. Interesting. Still, it’s pretty admirable of Trump to admit that being on The Apprentice would destroy any and all chances of Lindsay has  of recovering. We appreciate his honesty.

The entire motley crue of freaks, has-beens and divas that will be appearing this season include David Cassidy, Niki Taylor, Richard Hatch, Marlee Matlin, Meat Loaf, Mark McGrath, Playboy Playmate Hope Dworaczyk, Lil Jon, Dionne Warwick, LaToya Jackson, Gary Busey, José Canseco, Star Jones, RHOA‘s NeNe Leakes, Lisa Rinna, and country singer John Rich. See, Lindsay? Marlee Matlin has an Oscar and she is still doing Apprentice. Even if your career picks up again, there’s a huge chance you’ll find yourself being screamed at by Trump at some point in the future. Never give up hope.

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Professor Loaf Bids You Good Day

Meat Loaf

Can you guess which of those terrific British character actors this is? You know, one of those OBE recipients who spent years doing theater and British T.V. before finally breaking through in Hollywood? One of those guys who will betray George Clooney in a classy spy flick when he’s not doing an arthouse drama or playing Professor Buggleswaggle in a Harry Potter movie?

Just kidding—while the professorial-looking fellow above is en route to a British TV studio, it’s actually Meat Loaf on his way to the set of the talk show Loose Women. Hopefully he’ll get to sport this faux-Tom Wilkinson look when he appears on The Celebrity Apprentice alongside Lil Jon, Mark McGrath and Lisa Rinna next year. Shouldn’t be hard to outclass that batch!

[Photo: Splash News Online]