Celebrity Babies

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Katie And Suri Look Like Victorian Beggars, Tom Praises Paps

“Spare a penny for us, will you sir? We’re ever so cold and hungry, and poor little Suri hasn’t had a new Armani dress in days! Ever so cold and ‘umble we are. Cor, ain’t it cold out ‘ere?”

Katie Holmes and Suri Cruise rehearse on the streets of New York for the latest Victorian-era Charles Dickens adaptation. Or at least we think that’s what they were doing. Otherwise, how the hell do you explain these sacks clothes? Or maybe dad Tom Cruise sent them out insisting they get more paparazzi shots for his photo album. Bizarrely, he’s been quoted as praising the intrusive snappers, saying, “I have to say some of those paparazzi shots of my daughter are incredible. As a parent you protect your children but Suri is a very open and warm child and she will just wave to people on the street. She is such happy, fun girl.”

Yes, Tom, she’s adorable. But don’t you think it’s weird that we’ve seen more photos of your daughter than we have of our own family? [Photo: Splash News Online]

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by (@katespencer)

Baby Alert! Usher and Tobey Expecting (But Not Together)

Two hot Hollywood couples are expecting second children, and their timing could not be more perfect. We’ve just started getting sick of Bronx Mowgli Wentz and need some new tots to speculate about!

  • Usher and his wife Tameka Foster are expecting baby boy # 2 on December 15. Will Usher evoke George Foreman and name his newborn Usher VI? We can only hope.
  • Spiderman star Tobey Maguire and Jennifer Meyer are pregnant with their second child, and are due in the spring. Daughter Ruby is one of Hollywood’s cutest kids, we can’t wait to meet her sibling!

by (@katespencer)

Ashlee And Pete Ruin Baby Boy With Ridiculous Name

First things first: congratulations Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz! The emo rockers are now proud parents to a baby boy, who was born late Thursday night. Their new bundle of joy weighed in at 7 pounds, 11 ounces and is 20.5 inches long. Adorable! Now that that’s over, let’s get to the real news: They named their child Bronx Mowgli Wentz. Seriously. Time to get that newborn into therapy! Let’s break down their horrific name choice, shall we?

  • Bronx: Last time we checked Ashlee was from Dallas and Pete Chicago, so neither singer has any real connection to NYC other than that they probably wished they lived here. But hey, if you want to name your kid after their birthplace of rap, then fine. Maybe they should have added Boogie Down to it?
  • Mowgli: Holy sh*t. This is some character in The Jungle Book. If I were their baby I’d be learning to walk so I could run the eff out of there.

Even if poor Bronx tried to go by his initials – BMW – he’d still look like a total douchebag. We’d suggest BM, but that’s what our grandmother called a bowel movement back in the day. With a name like that, and a family that includes crazy aunt Jessica, we’d say poor little Bronxie is already f*cked.  [Photo: WireImage]

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How Britney’s Dad Stole Christmas

Apparently Britney Spears‘ “jail sentence” of a life has spilled over into her holiday plans. According to Star, Brit had an elaborate Christmas card photo shoot planned with her boys Sean Preston and Jayden James. She wanted to rent “real reindeer and even buy fake snow” and shoot her and the boys in their own little winter wonderland. But when her conservator dad Jamie heard about the estimated $20,000 bill for the livestock and trucked-in snow, he axed the idea and suggested the pop star just put her babies in some Christmas sweaters and snap some shots with her digital camera instead.

Britney discusses the rules she is under in her new documentary, For the Record, set to air on MTV November 30th. “If I wasn’t under the restraints I’m under, I’d feel so liberated,” the pop star says. “When I tell them the way I feel, it’s like they hear but they’re not really listening.” [Source: Star; Photo: Getty Images]

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Suri Cruise Is Hollywood’s Hottest Tot

Hollywood is full of celebrity toddlers, but who is the most powerful of them all? Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes‘ 2-year-old Suri beat out three Jolie-Pitt children, Cruz Beckham, and Sean Preston Federline to top Forbes‘ list of Hollywood’s Ten Hottest Tots. The list was based on a survey of press clippings and web presence for 50 plus star toddlers under 5. Suri topped the list by receiving more blog mentions than any other contender and being mentioned in 1,300 news articles. Check out the rest of the hot celebrity toddlers who rounded out the list in our gallery! [Source: Forbes.com; Photos: Getty Images, Splash News Online]

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Shocker: Angelina’s Breasts Are Not Perfect

Is there anything we don’t know about Angelina Jolie‘s boobs? We know how much Brad fancied their pregnant plumpness, and we’ve seen the pics of one of the Wondertwins being fed by the marvellous mammaries themselves (sorry). But apparently, she — and they — is not perfect! Angie’s now ‘fessed up how she couldn’t manage the twin trick of feeding them both at the same time. And stopped before the “perfect” date of six months! OMG!

“You think, ‘Ah, if anybody can do that, I can do that,”‘ she told GM:TV presenter Fiona Phillips in an interview, referring to the “football hold”. “But it’s a lot harder than it looks in the books. I did that a few times, but [mostly] I would take turns. It just takes a long time. I stopped by three months — it was about as much as I could do.”

We’d like to think, ha! Angie — you’re not so supermom after all! But we can’t, and actually like you even more for your frank admission. Damn it. Is there anything Ms Uncool can do to put us off her? Doesn’t seem it. [Photo: WireImage]

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Cutest Kid Of ’08: Vote Now!

The contenders for Cutest Kiddie of 2008 range from newborn to toddler, but they’ve all inherited three things: money, fame and stellar genes. A rock star straight from the womb, Kingston Rossdale has become a child style icon, often seen in Converse and flannel; at two-years old, he’s pioneered the preschool grunge trend. Shiloh Jolie-Pitt hit the genetic jackpot, and the little blondie has upheld the world’s expectation to be one of the most beautiful children we’ve seen. While Suri Cruise‘s home life may be bizarre, the stylista toddler is never photographed looking anything but adorable. Valentina Pinault is constantly smiling in the arms of momma Salma Hayek. But honestly, if you were nuzzled against her all day … you’d be giddy too, right?

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More categories. Vote now!

by (@katespencer)

Nicole Kidman Is Kinda Obsessed With Her Kid

Never mind that she has two children from her first marriage to Tom Cruise. Nicole Kidman hardly remembers those kids, as she’s just oh-so obsessed with her new baby, Sunday Rose! She gushed to USA Today about the joys of being a mom, again:

“The baby comes wherever I go, and I just like looking at her, watching her breathe. I stand over her crib and watch her breathe. It’s pathetic. My mum says I’m over-bonded. I don’t care. I’m just very bonded right now.”

It’s no wonder we never see Connor or Isabella chilling down under with their botox-loving mother. She seems to have forgotten all about them! Funny, she reminds of us another new mother – with short brown hair and a Broadway play – who’s way too into her kid. Think Suri and Sunday should have a play date?  [Photo: GettyImages]

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Rebecca Romijn To Name Her Baby After Dolly Parton

Rebecca Romijn, currently pregnant with twins, isn’t uttering celebrity favored descriptions of pregnancy like, “I feel the most beautiful I have in my entire life.” No, the Ugly Betty star feels differently. “I can’t move right now. I’m a beached whale,” she tells Page Six Magazine.  She also has a fear of saggy boobs. “I have not been without a bra this entire pregnancy. I refuse. I’m not taking any chances. I’m determined to keep the puppies up!” she says.

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Brad Pitt: Pax Peed On The Timeout Chair

Brad Pitt and Oprah Winfrey sat down for a little chit chat about his new movie, The Curious Case Of Benjamin Button, and of course the conversation turned to Angelina Jolie and their six children. Oprah asked Brad if he is the happiest he’s ever been, and Brad replied “Dare I say,”  to which O says, “Dare I see.” Brad also goes on to describe their six kids as “the funniest people.” What ever do they do that is so funny?

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