Celebrity Engagements

by (@missmuttoo)

LeAnn Rimes And Eddie Cibrian Are Engaged. Will They Wreck Their Own Marriage?

Controversial pair LeAnn Rimes and Eddie Cibrian are engaged. *crickets* It’s the second mazel tov we’re giving out today, since Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo are also getting hitched.

We’re wondering what the backlash to this announcement is going to be? They’re not exactly everyone’s favorite couple, since they’ve been branded as home-wreckers. LeAnne and Eddie were with their respective spouses Dean Sheremet and Brandi Glanville when they hooked up. And America hasn’t let them forget it since. Cue in the Shape magazine LeAnn cover controversy where public outcry was massive when the singer and Cibrian were written about. The editor, Valerie Latona, had to apologize in a statement that read, “Please know that our putting her on the cover was not meant to put a husband-stealer on a pedestal-but to show (through her story) how we all are human. And this woman in particular found strength in exercise in what she said was her most difficult personal moment.”

That apology was later semi-retracted with Latona backpedaling, “The fact is a mere 40 readers out of almost 6 million readers wrote in to complain calling LeAnn a ‘husband stealer’ and a ‘terrible mistake for Shape.’ I wrote to those women apologizing that our cover choice did not make them happy – as I have done for other cover stars in the past.”

Much ado about these two, as you can see. But now that they’re getting married, will they finally be accepted? Making things traditional has a way of acting like a balm. Perhaps people thought their relationship was just a pit-stop on Relationship Road. But now that they’re heading towards the aisle, you never know.

So yeah. Congrats?

by (@missmuttoo)

Vanessa Minnillo And Nick Lachey Are Engaged

Vanessa Minnillo and Nick Lachey are engaged, people. Lachey tweeted the happy news, writing, “I popped the question on bended knee. I do a lot of squats so my knees are very strong.” And you know what, it’s nice to hear people making a go of it, especially with all these celebrity breakups pouring in. These two have been dating since 2006, and survived a split last year, so maybe they’re in it for the long haul. Nick’s been married once before, to Jessica Simpson, and their betrothed antics were immortalized on their television show Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica. [Hint Nick: no more reality TV].

And do you know what the secret of their, hopefully, successful marriage will be? Minnillo and Lachey shower together twice a day. This is clean talk, so get your mind out of the gutter (we say this to ourselves too) because Vanessa explained, “It’s not a sexual thing and it’s not a romantic thing, it just becomes an intimate thing. You’re in your full form, so to speak, and you’re vulnerable and we just both let our guard down. I’ve had some of my most intimate conversations with him in the shower.” And with that, there’s no such thing as TMI anymore.

Congrats you two! May your hygienic union be long and fruitful.

by

Crystal Bowersox Is Engaged

Proving once again that the life of an American Idol runner-up is more intriguing than the life of the actual winner, we have a happy report today regarding season nine’s Crystal Bowersox. It was announced this weekend that Mama Sox is engaged!

Bowersox had a very public breakup with her boyfriend Tony just before the American Idol finale, but since the show ended she’s had a productive and positive summer, snagging a record deal and dealing with her snaggle tooth. Her engagement to musician Brian Walker is just one more bit of good news to add to the list. While the couple has only dated for a few months,  Walker and Bowersox appear to have known each other for at least year, having performed together at local shows in Chicago before Bowersox hit the big time on Idol. Congrats, guys!

by (@missmuttoo)

The Lead Singer Of Kings Of Leon Is Off The Market, Ladies

17172735

On an entirely selfish level, we’re thinking dammit! But on another unselfish, peace-and-love note (yes, we ARE capable of those), this is great news. The Kings of Leon lead singer Caleb Followill has popped the question to his model girlfriend, Lily Aldridge. And lest you think it’s a rumor, we’re sorry to inform you that his rep confirmed the news.

Lily appeared in the video for Use Somebody, and they’ve been together for two years. And FYI, Caleb’s brother and bandmate (he’s the drummer) Nathan Followill got married to singer Jessie Baylin last year. Which means they’re dropping one by one. Sigh.

So we don’t know what the date of the wedding is, but what we do know is when their next album, Come Around Sundown is releasing, and that’s on October 19. Caleb and Lily plan to get hitched after that, and we’re sure more details will be revealed closer to the date.

Congratulations on the engagement you two. We’re huge fans of the band, and of Caleb, so you’re one lucky lady, Lily!

[Photo: Getty Images]

by (@hallekiefer)

Linda Hogan Engaged, Planning Classiest Cougar Wedding Of The Century

linda_hogan_

When we look at all the mistakes we have made in our lives (and there have been SO MANY!!!), one of the most obvious has been our unintentional neglect of the diva known as Linda Hogan. Made famous as the wife of Hulk Hogan (who is also engaged) on Hogan Knows Best, Linda stole our hearts with a blindingly blue-white smile and a quick mascara-caked wink. Days, even weeks, go by without us sitting upright in bed, covered in sweat and wondering what Linda Hogan is doing right that second. And for that we are truly sorry. So today, in addition to sending out that hearty apology, we would like to congratulate Linda on her recent engagement to her fiancé Charlie Hill, who looks like a male clone of Linda created of herself. Any woman should be so lucky!

In celebration of this happy event, we would like to expound on some of the things that make Linda the epic diva she truly is:

  • She appears though she was molded out of orange Play-Doh, like a beautiful peacock made out of lumps.
  • She has the gumption to stick to her particular type of highly inappropriate boy toy: bleach blond, hyper tan, and younger than her own biological offspring.
  • She has a boat named the Alimoney (?!?!?@#$^&!*@!), on which she is getting married next summer to her 21-year-old fiancé. Who used to be her son’s best friend. And is 21.

She has a boat named the Alimoney on which she is getting married next summer to her 21-year-old fiancé. Did you not read that the first time? That is all we need to know! To be fair, her fiancé looks like he is 21 going on 63, and that’s on a good day. Linda’s daughter and Future Cougar Brooke Hogan has said about her mother’s November-January 1 relationship: “I personally don’t like it at all or condone it, but she’s my mom, so I have to show her support. I went to school with him. He was a grade under me. Me and Nick know him well.”

Look, Brooke, sometimes divas (that are also your mom) make decisions that make average people like us say, “Oh God, why?” And yes, while marrying her son’s friend does kinda make Linda her own grandpa, we have to accept that divas are like beautiful comets. They are with us for only a short time, expelling gas and dust into the atmosphere until they crash onto South Beach. At this rate, we believe Linda has the goods to easily become a Coco-level celebrity in our eyes, and we are happy to give her a leg up. Even if it means having to go to the dry-cleaner to get all the bronzer off of our pants.

View Photo Gallery

by

Orlando Bloom And Miranda Kerr Are Engaged

59048213

It’s time to celebrate the union of yet another unnaturally hot couple coming together in holy matrimony. Orlando Bloom and Miranda Kerr have confirmed that they’re engaged. Bloom and Kerr have dated for three years and have been the subject of many engagement rumors, but we can now put the speculation to rest.

Here’s to hoping these two have many years ahead of them, if only to get to the point where Kerr will start dyeing her gray hair orange and can speak the greatest line in the history of cinema, “Orlando, you like it? It’s autumn sunrise!” That, of course, is from the séance scene in Ghost, and shame on you if you have never seen it.

View Photo Gallery

[Photo: Getty Images]

by (@missmuttoo)

Bobby Brown Pops The Question On Stage

bobby-brown-alicia-etheridge

Watching someone move ahead with their lives is always great isn’t it? Bobby Brown‘s audience saw him do just that. The scene: the annual Funk Fest mega concert at Metro Park in Jacksonville, Florida. Brown was performing and ended up proposing to his girlfriend of nearly three years, manager Alicia Etheridge!

Etheridge joined Brown on stage holding their 11-month-old son Cassius, as the singer got down on one knee and presented her with a ring. The crowd roared its approval as a beaming Etheridge kissed Brown, who remained kneeling. Congrats to the couple! Hopefully this round will go much better than Brown’s nutty 15-year long marriage to Whitney Houston.