If we’re supposed to be impressed by Lindsay Lohan’s lawsuit de jour, the plaintiff is really going to have to up the ante. Stephen Clark filed a small claims court lawsuit against Lilo today, claiming that the actress never paid him for his work installing her stereo equipment. The sum total of the lawsuit? $1,180. Jeeeeeeez, Clark, this is the kind of lawsuit Lohan dealt with in grade school. This woman took on E*Trade and has worn an ankle bracelet more often than any regular bracelet. You’re in the big leagues now.
Clark alleges that he installed the equipment during Lindsay Lohan’s house arrest in June, and will also be suing for missed work. Too bad Lindsay eats lawsuits like this for breakfast. No, seriously, she physically eats them; that’s how she stays so thin.
[Photo: Getty Images]
On one hand, Rihanna’s “S&M“ video lawsuit is headed to trial. On the other hand, you know it’s going to be the sexiest trial of all time. “I find that an ordinary observer may well overlook any differences and regard the aesthetic appeal…as the same,” judge Shira Scheindlin wrote in a response to photographer David LaChapelle‘s claim that RiRi’s video ripped off his work. Judge Scheindlin also decided that certain “angles, poses and lighting” could potentially violate copyright law, as well as remarked that Rihanna’s “fair use” defense of the video was “misguided,” though we would like to add it is also “very cool” and “made us want to buy a latex cocktail dress.
While some of his allegations were tossed out of court, LaChapelle’s primary claim of copyright infringement is now allowed to proceed to trial. Rihanna was also sued by photographer Phillip Paulus last month, also for claims of copyright infringement in the exact same view. Let’s hope no one has a copyright on underwear built out of gum balls and Legos, or Rihanna’s concert outfits are going to have her in front of a judge in no time.
We know we joke about horrible celebrity parents a lot, but not even Michael Lohan on his worst day can touch the circumstances around Leighton Meester’s lawsuit against her mother, who she accuses of allegedly spending her brother Lex‘s medical fund. The Gossip Girl star was apparently sending $7,500 a month to be used for her brother, who suffers from health problems, and his medical bills. According to the suit, Constance Meester instead used the money on, wait for it,”plastic surgery on her face and stomach, Botox injections for her face, fillers for her hands and hair extensions.” Ain’t no hair extensions in the world beautiful enough to cover up that ugliness underneath. Well maybe there are, but only Beyonce can afford them and of course she wouldn’t need them.
Earlier this year Leighton Meester’s mother was also accused of making death threats against another mom at her son’s elementary school, which we’re sure is #2 on Lex Meester’s list of “Reasons I Can’t Wait Until I’m 18.” As a source told People, “This whole thing’s been really tough on Leighton. Her only concern has always been taking care of her brother. Leighton’s really close with her brother and her dad Ã¢â‚¬â€œ her parents are divorced. Leighton’s a sweet girl Ã¢â‚¬â€œ she cares about work, friends and family.” Let’s hope Constance doesn’t make the mistake of underestimating her daughter. We’ve seen The Roommate; we know what she’s capable of.
You can set the clock on your microwave by how frequently Lindsay Lohan gets into legal trouble. If this new lawsuit ever goes to court, the time will be approximately half-past crazy-cray. TMZ reports the suit stems from Lindsay Lohan’s Betty Ford incident last December, after which clinic employee Dawn Holland claimed a drunken Lohan man-handled her, lost her job for talking to the media and later issued a letter defending the actress. While battery charges were dropped by investigators, Holland is now seeking at least $1 million for “great mental, physical and nervous pain and suffering,” which is what we’re going to get if we have to cover a new Lohan trial so soon.
Meanwhile, the judge overseeing Lohan’s probation for the jewelry store incident is reportedly peeved that the Gotti actress hasn’t finished more of her community service or signed up for counseling in the months following her sentencing. If rumors are true, maybe Lohan’s boyfriend Spencer Falls is too much of a distraction for Lilo to get right with the law? When will these male models learn that orange mocha frappucinnos aren’t the solution to everything?
If there’s hope for a man who has been put in a friendly headlock by Michael Lohan, then there’s hope for us all. In a surprising reversal for such a prominent member of the Terrible Hollywood Parent Club (First rule: never talk about THP club), The Situation’s dad apologized for using his son’s image to insult him in the press, filling a settlement to end the on-going feud with his son. Wow, and here we thought giving Mr. Situation any attention would have the same effect as water on a gremlin: it might have been a mistake, but it’s too late to do anything about it now. Oh, and you might have to blow up a movie theater to get rid of him.
The Situation sued Frank Sorrentino back in May after his dear old dad released several videos attacking his son, as well as launched TheConfrontation.com, just so there would be a public record of how awful he is. And we thought Ronnie‘s mom calling him drunk in the middle of the day was bad. Also, tragic. The Situation has subsequently dropped his lawsuit, though Papa Sorrentino’s publishing agent Robert Fletcher does have to pay $5,000 as part of the settlement. As for Fletcher’s own kids, well, we’re assuming they can go ahead and hold their breath.
Who’s suing for what? Here’s the short version. Pamela Anderson sued ex-boyfriend Laurence Hallier for not giving her a promised condo in Las Vegas. They made a deal together and if that deal wasn’t honored on his behalf, he was supposed to give Pam $1 million in compensation. Now, the problem is that Laurence is saying Pamela didn’t honor the deal and she owes him money.
Hallier’s company built Panorama Towers in Vegas five-six years ago. She signed a deal in 2006 saying that she would make personal appearances to promote the buildings and would therefore, get a condo there as payment. Hallier says that Pamela didn’t show up at all for a number of appearances and thus, flaked on their agreement. She should not only forget about getting a pad, but Hallier’s countersuing Pamela for her inability to market the condos (by showing off her condos, hah, we kid), as she had promised. He claims that his company has suffered losses because of her screw-ups. And guess how much he’s suing her for!Ã‚Â $22.5 million! That’s the amount he alleges she cost him. Ouch. Thinking twice about having sued him, aren’t you, Pam?
Photographer Phillip Paulus is furious with Rihanna. Ã‚Â So much so, that he’s going to drag her into court. He’s accusing her of ripping off his ideas and using them in her S&M video! Apparently he has a series of fashion photographs called “Paperworld” which he claims have turned up, identical in each minute detail, in Ri-Ri’s video! His lawyers are taking the copyright infringement very seriously, which could mean big trouble for the singer.
Phillip isn’t shying away from talking about the screw up. He’s stated, “Why a worldwide celebrity is not able to afford a creative director, who creates individual concepts and staging, is incomprehensible for me. To create new things within the creative cosmos, you can only expect this to come from a real genius, there is no doubt about that.” And then comes the real blow which literally made us go “ouch:” “However, in this case there is no real genius who created their own work instead they stole ideas from a creative talent. Furthermore every other creative professional should realize how supremely embarrassing it is to copy the work of colleagues from the artistic world and then toÃ‚Â be praised for it.”
In Paulus’s Paperworld, there are images of a model wearing a flouncy gown pinned back by a sheet of plastic. She’s surrounded by black tape X’s on the wall that she’s pushed up against. The same imagery and placing is in Rihanna’s video as well. It depicts a model in a poofy gown trapped against a wall by a sheet of plastic, surrounded by big XÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s made out of black tape. In it, Rihanna also wears a big dress and is constricted by a layer of plastic against a wall, with nearly identical XÃ¢â‚¬â„¢s around her. Uber-photog David LaChappelle has sued Rihanna as well, for the same video and the same copyright infringement issue. He claimed she appropriated the “composition, total concept, feel, tone, mood, theme, colours, props, settings, decors, wardrobe and lighting” of some of his work.
Wow, we always sort of pictured Tobey Maguire as a quiet, smiling quasi-wiener of a guy, maybe with some blueberry pie smeared on his face that he doesn’t know about. However, it seems the actor has been dropping that Cider House Rules money when he shouldn’t have, and now Tobey Maguire’s gambling winnings are being called out in a lawsuit that makes Tobey seem shockingly hard-core. Allegedly Maguire frequently takes part in illegal poker games populated by celebrities and millionaires (which fits with what we suspected about famous people). Maguire might have been able to keep his Bond-esque nighttime activities private if he hadn’t won money from Bradley Ruderman, a hedge fund manager who used his clients money in the games, thereby enabling card shark Maguire to buy all the short-sleeved button downs his mild heart could desire.
Ruderman is currently in jail for defrauding investors, and trustees of his bankrupt company are trying to get back the reported $25 million he lost to various high-rollers, including $311,200 currently stuffed in Maguire’s wallet. Matt Damon, Leonardo DiCaprio and Ben Affleck also took part in the poker games, but aren’t being sued, despite how cool that would make all of them seem right now. Other players such as The Notebook‘s Nick Cassavetes have been named in the lawsuit, meaning that while we were weeping into our sweatshirts over Noah and Allie finally getting together in the rain, Cassavetes was making it rain hundos all over the Hollywood elite.
Considering how many people have been fondled by Andy Dick without consent and exposed to his genitals, it’s a little ironic the comedian’s being sued by someone who actually paid to see him. But yes, a man who went to a Dick show in Dallas late last year wants damages after the Celebrity Rehab regular whipped out his Dick-and-Andys from under a dress and rubbed them on the poor guy’s face. By the way—the fellow disappointed by his encounter with Dick’s genitalia while Andy was dressed like a woman? His last name is Tucker. Dick vs. Tucker. Boom.
While we certainly wouldn’t want to be among Dick’s many molestees, and would likely feel “degraded and humiliated” if we did somehow wind up with a cheek rub from Andy’s Dick, we’re a little intrigued by the victim’s claim that he’s been “harassed and ridiculed by the workers he supervises as well as his management peers.” Did the entire company go to the Dick show? Did someone take a photo? There’s a story here, and it’s not that Andy Dick will be in jail for a long, long time if they ever make a “three strikes” rule for public indecency.
[Photo: Getty Images]
If you noticed ShamWow pitchman/hooker-puncher Vince Shlomi on the red carpet in 2009 or 2010—a big if, admittedly—you probably assumed the woman standing next to him was his girlfriend. Apparently not, judging from Jennifer Kosinski’s lawsuit against Shlomi, as the model/personal assistant wants $75,000 in lost wages and unspecified damages after he tried to make her his “love slave.” Initially hired as a customer service rep by Shlomi, Kosinski soon because his personal assistant and “chaperone,” living in his condominium and working 24/7. Shlomi even allegedly said “why don’t you just see him when he’s in the grave?” when she asked for time to visit her cancer-stricken father.
Despite considering their relationship “amicable” and their public appearances a “business responsibility,” Kosinski knew Shlomi wanted more from her, as he allegedly stalked her ex-boyfriend, touched her daily, watched her on the beach with binoculars and offered her $20,000 and a “one month paid vacation for her parents to travel the world” if she’d sleep in his bed and give him “her eggs.” He also cursed at her when she refused to give him “the secret formula” to her heart. Despite Kosinski never receiving overtime and dealing with the daily creepage, Shlomi wound up firing her in April 2010, 9 months after she was hired, when she wouldn’t show him a text she received. Shlomi’s lawyers had no comment, though we’re still curious why an aspiring model would stick with this nightmare gig in the first place!
See photos of Kosinski on the job with Shlomi in the gallery below.
[Photo: Getty Images]