Christina McLarty

by (@hallekiefer)

Joe Francis’s Wife Allegedly Bails A Month Into Marriage

In news that should surprise absolutely nobody, reportedly Joe Francis’s wife Christina McLarty has moved out of the home she shares with the Girls Gone Wild mogul, ostensibly after she rolled over one day and realized that she was married to Joe Francis. Though Francis’s rep denied earlier this week that the couple had split, sources reported to RadarOnline that McLarty is now living with her mother. Wow, we do not envy Christina the gauntlet of relatives, friends and random strangers lining up to tell her “I told you so.” We mean, they undoubtedly told her so. But still.

Though there hasn’t been any official statement about the break-up, Francis reportedly opened up about the couple’s problems over Christmas. “He was talking about the details of the separation openly while at the Kardashian holiday party. Christina moved out a bit after Thanksgiving,” a source claimed. The couple wed the first week of November after dating for four years, which makes their marriage approximately one month longer than we would have possibly imagined. If we had to guess, we’d assume Francis is currently drowning his sorrows in the wet t-shirts of America’s youth. Sometimes you have to bury yourself in work to get through this kind of terrible news. 

by (@missmuttoo)

Girls Gone Wild Sleazeball Joe Francis Getting Hitched

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We didn’t think it was possible, but someone finally made an honest man out of JoeGirl Gone WildFrancis. That lucky lady would be his new fiancée, Christina McLarty. He recently popped the question while getting some down time in St. Tropez and, surprise surprise, she said yes! They’re also going to be making a political statement out of the nuptials, Francis revealed, “We have chosen to have a civil domestic partnership because we don’t believe it’s appropriate to be married until our gay and lesbian friends are afforded the same rights as us to legally marry in the United States.” Right on!

Ever the romantic, Francis’s proposal was completely spontaneous (translation: He didn’t want to pop for a ring on the chance she said no). When pressed for comment, he simply said, “We’re having one made.” Don’t expect the party to be so low-key, though. The approximately 200 guest ceremony will probably take place in September at Francis’ Casa Aramara in Punta Mita, Mexico. That’s his crazy deluxe beachfront mansion. Hmmm, wasn’t this guy just in major financial trouble? Anyway, our favorite part of this whole crazy situation is that Quincy Jones –yes, that Quincy Jones– will be his best man! The two have been neighbors for ages in Bel Air. No word yet on how many half-naked women will serve as bridesmaids.
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