Computers

by (@hallekiefer)

DMX Admits He Doesn’t Know How To Google Himself, Might Literally Be Your Great Aunt

We don’t know how exactly to put this, but we’ve been gathering evidence (mainly from this Grantland post) and we’ve come to the conclusion that the rapper DMX might actually your great aunt on your father’s side. As suggested by a recent interview with Power 105.1, DMX too is charmingly perplexed by computers and the Internet. Other than his history of drug possession and animal cruelty, DMX and your great aunt could be twins! Let’s break down the facts, shall we? Both DMX and your great aunt…

  1. Love pairing a gigantic diamond cross necklace with t-shirts.
  2. Are open enough to admit, “I don’t even know how to use the computer.”
  3. Are stubborn enough to declare, “I don’t want to learn how to use the computer.”
  4. Generally seem baffled by the computer, describing it as “scary.”
  5. Don’t know you have to hit Enter when Googling and we are dying now.
  6. While unfamiliar with the Rainbow Wheel of Death, know instinctively to hate it: “I don’t have patience for s— like that.”
  7. Don’t seem to mind when content editor Vanessa Denis publicly chastises them for reaching for the wrong mouse.
  8. Act like computers, Google and technology are so preposterous, no adult should be expected to master them, claiming “That’s like something you call somebody, like a baby ‘goo-goo’ — it’s weird.”
  9. Once vacuumed a nightclub just to be nice.

On the other hand…DMX claims “I know how to do it on a phone,” which is proof positive he and your great aunt are not literally inhabiting the same body. Other than that, the case is still open. We were going to say this video opens up a whole line of questioning about what DMX’s life is like, but we’re pretty sure we have an idea: infinite soft caramels, microwavable socks and all the Dateline episodes a person could want. All of which sounds way better than the Internet 99% of the time.

by (@missmuttoo)

Katy Perry To Take Over Computers Everywhere, Turns Herself Into A Sim

We’re not very well versed in “sim” speak, but apparently, Katy Perry has already done a Simlish — that’s the language of The Sims —  music video for Hot and Cold and it became one of the most popular Sim music videos ever. The Sims is a hugely popular life-simulation gaming series, and now the company is planning to recreate Katy’s Sim success with The Sims 3 Showtime, Katy Perry. Basically they’re planning a whole set of multiple games revolving around the singer. Everything will be as authentic as possible, from sets to props to hairstyles to clothes, as you can see in the photograph above. It’s going to be completely Katy Perry themed and she revealed, “… It’s cool to see the Sims’ stage performances in The Sims 3 Showtime decked out just like my California Dreams Tour – even my cotton candy video screens are in there! I always like to think of myself as a cartoon, and now I’m a Sim!” Just what we need to take our bathroom singing to the next level.

[Photo: Splash News Online]

by (@JordanRuntagh)

The 10 Fab-est Things We Owe To Steve Jobs

“Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.” – Steve Jobs, Stanford University Commencement Speech, 2005

The world lost one of its most original visionaries, as Steve Jobs passed away yesterday at the age of 56. Like Edison, Gutenberg and Henry Ford all rolled into one, Jobs and his Apple Inc. gave us so many tools that we’ve almost come to take for granted in our everyday existence. The man improved our lives immeasurably and changed the way we think. His devices made the world a little smaller and a little closer. In Steve’s memory, we’d like to give a FabLife salute and take a look at some of the many gifts he gave us in his much-too-short lifetime.

And yes, this is sent from our MacBook Pro.

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