Crime

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Charlie Sheen Could Go To Jail For Discussing Brooke Mueller’s Drug Use

Everyone angry that the LAPD is hunting Lindsay Lohan down while Charlie Sheen isn’t in jail may soon get their wish. TMZ says Brooke Mueller will argue that Sheen is in contempt of their divorce agreement, seeing as how it stipulates that “Charlie agrees to not disclose to any media sources personal information relating to Brooke’s alleged drug usage.” That’s something he’s definitely been doing a lot of, accusing her of being loaded during a recent trip to the Bahamas and even showing Mueller’s alleged crackpipe to Radar. It’s not hard to believe Charlie would forget what he’s not supposed to say, considering you really shouldn’t say any of the stuff coming up in Sheen’s television rants.

If Sheen is found in contempt, the judge could send him away for as long as 6 months, though it seems unlikely he’ll get so stiff a term if the mother of his children is doing cocaine again. But throw this news on top of Brooke’s accusations of abuse and death threats, and it looks like the guy may be off to a true “sober valley lodge” without his goddesses before too long.

[Photo: Getty Images]

by (@hallekiefer)

John Galliano Faces Jail Time For Anti-Semitic Slurs, Issues Denial

The prospect of John Galliano in prison isn’t a pretty one; he’d be ruling with an paisley fist before you’d know it. High-waisted orange palazzo pants as far as the eye can see! Since French law considers anti-Semitism a crime,  John Galliano faces jail time for his anti-Semitic slurs. If convicted, Galliano could be looking at six months in prison and more than $31,000 in fines. Galliano already looks like The Joker; maybe it was only a matter of time before he started lording over the underworld. Just let him get that purple suit and green bow tie dry-cleaned and he’s good to go!

Now that he’s looking at prison time, Galliano issued an apology for his comments…well, sort of. “I completely deny the claims made against me and have fully cooperated with the police investigation,” John said. “A number of independent witnesses have given evidence and have told the police that I was subjected to verbal harassment and an unprovoked assault when an individual tried to hit me with a chair having taken violent exception to my look and my clothing. For these reasons I have commenced proceedings for defamation and the threats made against me.” Sure, because why wouldn’t Galliano declare “I love Hitler!” when getting into a street brawl? “However, I fully accept that the accusations made against me have greatly shocked and upset people,” Galliano admitted. “I must take responsibility for the circumstances in which I found myself and for allowing myself to be seen to be behaving in the worst possible light.” We guess if he wasn’t seen making racist statements, Galliano wouldn’t feel so contrite. Ah, but if people don’t see him, how will they know about his cutting-edge fashion sense? Merde, it’s a Catch-22!

[Photo: Getty Images]

by (@missmuttoo)

Andy Dick Photographed Allegedly Snorting Cocaine

Hello, train wreck! RadarOnline has just published photos of Andy Dick allegedly doing cocaine at an L.A bar’s parking lot! The supposed coke bender also had its fair share of groping a la Andy. A source at the Corner Club says that he walked into a bathroom and saw Andy hooking up with a woman commenting, “I walked in and I saw that freak Andy Dick sucking on a woman’s [breast]…. He was all over her in the men’s bathroom, she was lifting his shirt and he was kissing her naked breasts.” Our first though was ewww. Our second thought why would anyone let that washed up tool anywhere near their person.

Post his restroom make-out Dick and his lady pal went to their car where the source overheard the actor saying, “give me the coke, give me the coke”. The photos depict Andy supposedly snorting the coke off a CD sleeve in the car while intermittently groping his make-out buddy’s breasts. Class acts, these. The source added, “They were in their own little world. He was oblivious to everything except the cocaine and the woman with him.” Not the first time Dick’s been in trouble. We’re kinda losing track of his stories. The recent ones that come to mind are him harassing Tera Patrick and being thrown out of the AVN awards, the Dick being arrested for sexual abuse, and groping an underage girl. It’s enough to give Charlie Sheen a complex!

[Photo: Splash News Online]

by (@missmuttoo)

Christina Aguilera Public Intoxication Mugshot Out

Thank you E! for Christina Aguilera‘s mugshot! As you all know, the singer and her boyfriend, Matthew Rutler, were arrested early yesterday morning on charges of  public drunkenness. Rutler also got booked for a DUI. Now apparently, this mugshot wasn’t going to be released to the public because authorities aren’t planning to press charges, but as many things do in Hollywood, it got out anyway. This isn’t helping her case exactly, with all the reports of Christina’s excessive drinking and her meltdowns doing the rounds.

The L.A. Sheriff’s Department’s rep Steve Whitmore had commented that Aguilera was quite cooperative during her arrest and “not belligerent in anyway whatsoever” through the process. For someone who was that hammered, we also have to say, that mugshot isn’t half-bad at all. Her hair looks fine, and make-up isn’t too smudged and she doesn’t seem to have a case of drunk-eye! But it’s like what Pink tweeted, “Out of Myself, Britney, and Christina- didn’t everyone think I was gonna be the troublemaker? LOOK MA!!! No CUFFS!!!” What do you say, guys? Is Christina on a downward spiral? What’s your verdict on her mugshot?

[Photo via E! Online]

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Christina Aguilera And Matthew Rutler Arrested After Night Of Drinking

Yikes! Christina Aguilera and her boyfriend Matthew Rutler were arrested last night. Aguilera was taken in by the LAPD for public drunkenness while Rutler was arrested for driving under the influence of alcohol. The pair was taken to the West Hollywood Sherriff’s Station at around 2:45am, TMZ reports, and a source says that Aguilera was “extremely intoxicated” and “unable to take care of herself.” This is just one more stumble for Xtina, who’s has a rough year so far after her National Anthem misstep at the Superbowl and reportedly having not-so-discreet sex with Rutler at a family party. It’s been rumored that Aguilera has refused rehab for what appears to be a worsening alcohol problem.

We’ll keep you updated on this story as more details emerge.

[Photo: Getty Images]

by (@missmuttoo)

Sharon Stone Seeks A Restraining Order From A Mentally Ill Intruder

Sharon Stone‘s trying to get a restraining order against a man named Bradly Gooden, who seems to have more than a couple of screws loose. Gooden claims he wrote The King’s Speech at the age of 2, and that he is an FBI agent and the son of Hilary Clinton. What is it with crazy people and Hilary? Even Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi‘s intruder had a rambling letter addressed to Clinton.

In a similar case to DeGeneres and de Rossi, Gooden broke into Stone’s home and was found by police, waiting for her to return. Thank God she wasn’t home at the time. He claims that his mother—Hilary—had bought Sharon’s home for him, as a gift! That’s the reason he gave for traveling from Ohio and breaking in. It’s no surprise that he was placed in a psychiatric hold. Sharon’s filed an order in court stating, “I have been subjected to a course of conduct which has and is seriously alarming, annoying and harassing me. I am in fear from Mr Gooden for my personal safety, and that of those around me, including especially my children and family, as well as my friends and employees.”

She has good reason for the order, because Gooden apparently really thinks the house is his, saying, “It’s now my house, I live here” and apparently, “seems undeterred from returning to the property.” Stone’s been granted a temporary restraining order, but will that compute for him?

[Photo: Getty Images]

by (@hallekiefer)

Did Lindsay Have An Accomplice During The Jewelry Heist?

The Joker had Harley Quinn. Jafar had Iago. Lindsay Lohan had…well, no one knows his name, but new rumors are rolling in, alleging that Lohan’s friend helped her steal the necklace at the center of Lindsay’s current legal battle. “As Lindsay was putting her necklace back on, it’s apparent the store clerk was distracted by the male companion that was with Lindsay,” a source who has seen the security tape told RadarOnline. “The video then shows Lindsay and her male friend walking out of the store, all while Lindsay was wearing the necklace.” We find this a little hard to believe. We mean, why would she bother to have a henchman if she isn’t going to make him repel down from air duct under the cover of smoke bombs?

E! reports that the Los Angeles D.A. confirms Lohan had a friend in the jewelry store with her. Lindsay has until March 10 to accept the plea deal, have her case taken to court or (this is our suggestion) have her sidekick built a giant laser to cut through the wall of the courthouse and allow Lohan to escape in a rocket-powered hovercraft. Only two of those options are legal, but the other one would just terrify the citizens of Metropolis.

[Photo: Splash News Online]

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Lindsay Lohan Plunges Into Court, Rejects Plea Deal

Does Lindsay Lohan think Judge Keith L. Schwartz is a breast man? Lindsay’s tight white dress was a serious head-turner at her arraignment earlier this month, and she just showed up for her next hearing wearing a tight jeans, a looooowwwww cut shirt and a necklace diving deep into her cleavage. According to TMZ, both the judge and DA think Lindsay should do jail time, but Lohan is insistent that she’d go to trial and plead her innocence rather than agree to a prison sentence. Maybe she’s trying to subconsciously suggest to the judge that no one should want to put these behind bars.

UPDATE: The shirt didn’t work—Judge Schwartz has refused any plea that doesn’t have Lindsay doing time. LiLo didn’t back down though, so it looks like she’ll have plenty of time to flaunt her decolletage for the jury when her grand theft felony case goes to trial.

[Photo: Splash News Online]

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Could Lindsay Lohan Go To Jail Without A Trial?

You’d think she was the Joker or something. With Lindsay Lohan‘s grand theft felony case looking less and less likely to send her to the slammer, TMZ reports that the District Attorney’s office still has an ace up their sleeve. Sources apparently told the site that the DA may give up on Lohan’s upcoming trial, and instead have a judge say her probation was violated. The following hearing wouldn’t have to involve a jury, and eliminate the whole “reasonable doubt” element that hangs up many celebrity trials—the judge just has to believe Lindsay was “likely” to have taken the necklace without permission, which shouldn’t be hard. If they succeed, the DA’s office could ask to have LiLo put away for more than a year. Better start printing those FREE LINDSAY t-shirts now, guys.

On the lighter side of LiLo, Radar says the actress can’t even get a break from an ATM machine. “Lindsay was at a pharmacy and tried to take money out of the ATM with three different cards,” says their witness. “Finally she asked for help after the screen flashed to ‘call for service’ and she realized it was broken.” Unsurprisingly, the clerk didn’t know how to fix the situation, and Lindsay left without her cash. Guess it’s just not Lindsay day (or her week, or month, or year).

[Photo: Getty Images]

by (@missmuttoo)

Random Dude Crashes Paris Hilton’s 30th Birthday Party, Steals Her Cake

This story is so hilarious that we’re going to jump straight into it. Some dude called Paz gate-crashed Paris Hilton‘s 30th birthday party and stole her cake. We kid you not. He’s chronicled his confectionary-criminal spree on his Facebook page, complete with photographs from inside the bash.

The cake itself was apparently worth $2,000 dollars and as Paz describes it, “It’s big. It’s red. It’s says Paris.” His elaborate journal entry starts one day before Paris-gate thanks to a friend’s phone call inviting him to be a fellow crasher. It takes you through Paz and friend “Kevin” strolling down the red carpet, bodypainted nymphs with Tinkerbell wings and an 8-foot tall Iron Man impersonator. There were six open bars on site, which the duo liberally sampled from.

Of the actual cake-hijacking, Paz writes, “… It was at this inebriated moment I decided no one was going to waste $2,000 with of anything on my watch. ‘Hey’, I mumble to Kevin, ‘I have to rescue the cake’.” That’s exactly what superhero Paz did because no one was paying attention or eating the damn thing. After Paris had blown out the candles of course! They’re not mean, guys. They’re socially and financially prudent, clearly.

They swiped it, by dodging the head of security, the waiter and God knows who else, and took their prize home. And in the end, he wrote, “It’s red. It’s delicious. And I don’t know WTF I’m going to do with it.” Erm, pass us a slice? Also, did anyone even notice that it was missing? Happy Birthday, Paris! You can’t make this stuff up.

[Photo: Splash News Online/Facebook]

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