Charts, schmarts. Kris Allen arrived on Idol with little to no fanfare, and now he’s in the top 2 with chosen one Adam Lambert. Looks like Danny Gokey‘s Christian television cult couldn’t make up for his tight pants and sloppy singing. What was Milwaukee’s own thinking as he pressed his finger to his lip, feigned serenity and watched his farewell reel? Probably something along the lines of “Kris Allen? Kris Allen? Are you for real? I, Danny Gokey, lost to Kris Allen?” You know it had to hurt.
Can Lambert tongue-lash the upstart out of the ring, or will Allen’s lucky streak take him all the way to the top? Only one week to go!
[Photo: Getty Images]
You are so beautiful to meeeeeOOHH MY GODDD!!! The Top 3 got two songs each last night on American Idol—first they had to sing the worst possible song the judges could think of, then they had to sing the crap they plan to peddle on us once they’re off the show. Naturally, the second song was a little tighter—especially for Danny Gokey‘s pants.
And you thought his scream was bad—Danny Gokey‘s performance of “Billie Jean” during his Milwaukee homecoming would have steam coming out of Simon Cowell‘s ears. Blaming a lyric sheet that blew away, Gokey stands silently at first, before arguing with the back-up singers (one announcing “I’d leave it to the professionals!”), messing up the arrangement (“but the key changed!”) and basically getting run over by a merciless band that refuses to let him find his place. Were they big Allison Iraheta fans?
“That’s all I got for you, Milwaukee—I don’t know the words!” If that’s the case, why was he singing it in the first place? Hopefully he’ll learn the words if he’s performing it again for Tuesday’s Top 3.
Last night we shed a single tear for Allison Iraheta who, despite 64 million votes being cast on Tuesday, got the lowest amount and was ousted from American Idol. It pains us to admit that our baby’s gone. We know Adam Lambert is going to win this now, he’s the only performer the judges haven’t criticized harshly for any of his performances and that’s the only thing that pains us more than seeing Allison go. We can barely go on anymore. But we must. …
It’s Rock Week on American Idol! We’ve got Slash! We’ve got duets! Some sign above the stage rocked so hard it fell down! But if Slash is your mentor, we half expect these kids to sing some G’n’R or hey, what about “Enter Sandman”? Songs that are a little dirty and gritty…ROCK, y’know? Instead we got a watered down “Come Together” from Kris Allen, a version of “Dream On” that was more pitchy than the Yankees bullpen from Danny Gokey, and decent but not exactly rockin’ versions of “Whole Lotta Love” and “Crybaby” from Adam Lambert and Allison Iraheta. Still, it was a pretty action-packed show.
As we predicted, Matt Giraud was booted from American Idol this week, but in a moment we didn’t expect, his fellow bottom (hee) was Adam Lambert. Apparently that was something NO one expected and there was shock, confusion and a moment of silence so Paula Abdul and Kara DioGuardi could work through their feelings. We also got appearances from Natalie Cole (she looks good!) and Taylor Hicks (he looks fine!) and Jamie Foxx (he looks like he has a movie coming out!), and a few other noteworthy moments too.
5. They Made a Cake, But Kara Can Eat It.
It’s birthday week on Idol as well as being Rat Pack week – Danny Gokey and Allison Iraheta both celebrated a birthday in the past few days, so in a not-at-all staged moment, the gang baked a cake in the Idol Kitchen. Only it turned into a food fight! It’s times like this that we wish Kris Allen wasn’t married or Danny wasn’t freshly widowed because this food fight had the least amount of sexual tension we’ve ever seen, and we were looking hard for it. Give us some sexy, flirtatious singles, Idol! There is no drama in this group, we are dying of boredom! The closest we can get to sexytime on this show is Kara telling the world her jaw is conditioned to drop open every time she sees Adam. And we all know that feeling’s not mutual.
This week’s American Idol felt predictable because a) it was Rat Pack theme week which means we got a bunch of standards, but without any of the banter, martini-sloshing, and stage presence that made the Rat Pack so enjoyable and b) there are four solid contestants left and one inconsistent Matt Giraud, who is probably going to go home this week, but we knew that he would never win this thing, so: predictable. On to the good stuff.
Simon Cowell told TV Guide “nobody would have predicted the possibility that the third place is Kris [Allen]” in a recent interview, but if iTunes is any indication, the American Idol judge may be in for an even bigger surprise. According to the New York Post, the usually-secret sales chart for Idol mp3s was briefly visible to fans last week thanks to a computer error. While front-runner Adam Lambert unsurprisingly holds 6 of the top 10 spots, Kris Allen holds 3—and Danny Gokey only 1.
Neither Gokey nor Allen has ever made the bottom 3 (unlike Matt Giraud or Allison Iraheta), but—either due to Gokey’s loud fanbase or Allen’s humble persona—Allen has rarely been mentioned as a potential finalist. If he continues to score and Gokey fails to improve his game, the guitar-strumming cutie may wind up Idol‘s last man standing…next to Lambert.
[Photo: Getty Images]