Drugs

by (@katespencer)

Kat Stacks Is The New HBIC, Claims Soulja Boy Is “A Cokehead”

Apparently Kat Stacks is some stripper/groupie type who looks like a super-hot, kinda freaky Britney Spears-Nicki Minaj hybrid, and apparently she bangs a lot of dudes. She apparently hooked up with Soulja Boy who apparently flew her to Atlanta so they could screw. And he apparently does cocaine, or so she says in this lovely NSFW video that she took in the hotel suite she apparently shared with the hip-hop star. In it, we see her artificially perky boobs, some lines of coke (gross) and Soulja-Boy…apparently.

The only thing we know for sure: Kat Stacks is not one to be messed with. She says it best herself: “Dont let my dimples fool you, i appear innocent on the outside but inside im a evil cold hearted sneaky grimey street bitch.” Everything else about this story and video is alleged, hearsay, rumor and speculation, and it’s propelling Ms. Stacks to the top of Google and Twitter trends. To quote Kat Stacks, “I salute a bad bitch when I see her.”

Consider yourself saluted, crazy lady.

by (@missmuttoo)

Miley To Flash Brazilian Bikini Wax In Movie. Yay?

You’ve have heard of this new movie  starring Miley Cyrus and Demi Moore, right? It’s called LOL: Laughing Out Loud and the two play mom-and-daughter onscreen. Off-screen they’re BFF, hitting up bars together and such.

With a title that uses web-approved abbreviations, we thought it was going to be a Freaky Friday-like goofball chick flick. Turns out it’s a lot more like the sexy, Nikki Reed-penned Thirteen and you’re going to see a lot more of Miley than you’d like to. Case in point: Miley’s character will flash her brazilian bikini wax at Demi. You’re getting the picture, right? Not-so-little Miley’s all about the sex and drugs in this movie.

Please prepare yourself for some serious TMI. Apart from flashing her wax, she’s also going to lose her V-Card, smoke a doobie, get dee-runk and make out with two girls. Well, Miley’s kissed girls before, so the last part should be a breeze. But we can’t wait to watch Demi’s momma character tell Miles, “You’re my daughter. And I won’t let you turn into a porn star!”

We can already hear Miley’s defense for those who criticize her for portraying a super-sexual teen: Relax y’all. It’s just acting. I’m a performer.

[Photo:]

by (@hallekiefer)

Lindsay’s Crazy Behavior Might Be The Result of Drugs, Just Not The Ones You’d Think

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Uh oh, now this is embarrassing. The whole time we’ve been scandalized by the roller coaster ride that is Lindsay Lohan, Adderall use might actually be the reason for her notoriously erratic behavior. According to doctors at UCLA Neuropsychiatric Hospital, the treatment facility Lindsay was released to once she flew the coop, Lohan was misdiagnosed with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. Unfortunately, she was also prescribed the heavy duty medication designed to treat the illness. According to doctors, if someone takes Adderall when they don’t have ADHD, they “can experience similar effects as people who use cocaine or methamphetamine”, eventually exhibiting manic behavior and insomnia. Hmmm, any of that sound familiar? Actually, any chance the whole Lohan family has a prescription?

We would ask how Lindsay’s physician could misdiagnose her so badly, but if recent celebrity deaths tell us anything, the doctors that hover around famous people usually have the words “Of Mixology” printed on their diplomas. Combine the Adderall with a party mom, nutso dad and a million dollar bank account, and you’ve got a serious recipe for disaster, as well as an explanation for why Lindsay would do that to her lips. We really hope this leads to an upturn in Lohan’s mental health, and are sending her good vibes. Oh, and while we’re at it, someone check Mel Gibson’s medicine cabinet. He’s probably just horrible, but it’s worth a try. [Photo: Getty Images]

by (@missmuttoo)

Paris Hilton’s Breasts Pimp Her New Fragrance

For some strange reason, Paris Hilton deems it fit to introduce some more stank, erm, fragrance to the unsuspecting public. She’s already got like, a gazillion scents out there with groundbreaking names like Paris, Heiress, Siren, Fairy Dust and Just Me. Somebody needs to tell Paris what Fairy Dust also means. It’s that white stuff that got her pal Lindsay Lohan into a whole lotta trouble. And after Paris’ pot shenanigans, she needs to walk a careful line (line…heehee).

Back to the point. Paris and her boobs dressed up as Marilyn Monroe to promote her latest scent, Tease. Because she wanted to hit you on the head with throwing in as much tease as possible. Paris is a tease. Marilyn is a tease. Perfume is a tease. You can’t run, you can’t hide.

What we want to know is A. does anybody care and B. does anybody even buy this stuff?

by (@hallekiefer)

Gaga Worried Lovers Will Steal Creativity Through Her Vagina; Doesn’t Let It Ruin Her Weekend

Epic diva Lady Gaga bares more than just the lower 2/3 of her butt in September’s Vanity Fair, using the interview to discuss her dust-up with Jerry Seinfeld, her love for her fans and a new-found commitment to celibacy. Why the decision to steer clear of any disco sticks? According to the singer, “I have this weird thing that if I sleep with someone they’re going to take my creativity from me through my vagina.”

Yup, that is a weird thing! Continues Gaga, “I’m perpetually lonely. I’m lonely when I’m in relationships.” Wait a minute, are we sure they didn’t publish part of an interview with Jennifer Aniston by mistake? Also discussed is Gaga’s history of drug-use, and what her family did once the abuse caused her to have a destructive break-down: packed the singer up and took her to grandma’s house in West Virginia. When faced with her granddaughter’s hysterical melt-down, Grandma Gaga reportedly told her, “‘I’m gonna let you cry for a few more hours. And then after those few hours are up, you’re gonna stop crying, you’re gonna pick yourself up, you’re gonna go back to New York, and you’re gonna kick some ass.”

Wow, we guess being a bad-ass is genetic! Considering that Gaga has had her foot firmly planted on the music industry’s behind ever since, might we suggest that Mema Gaga take her skills on a world-wide tour of rehab centers? Or at least plan to stop by and give Lindsay Lohan a rehab pep-talk soon?

by (@missmuttoo)

Lindsay Lohan Out Of Jail And Headed To A Treatment Center

Lindsay Lohan is out of jail and she’s headed straight for her rehabilitation treatment. Looks like the news of her being released early were correct, because she only spent 13 days behind bars as opposed to a full 90 day sentence! The L.A Sheriff’s spokesperson, Steve Whitmore, confirmed the news to the waiting press stating, “She was released at 1:35 a.m. She has been sent directly to her next destination, which is a treatment center. And she will now be under the supervision of the L.A. County probation department. This concludes her custody.”

Lindsay is allegedly headed to the UCLA Medical Center and not Morningside Recovery, as Judge Martha Revel had originally sentenced. Two court appointed psychiatrists (who were also selected by Judge Revel) had suggested four possible places for Lindsay’s treatment, and Morningside was not on that list. Lindsay needed serious psychological and substance abuse treatment, for which UCLA is better suited.

Easy now, Lindsay. You’re almost done. And remember, you’re going to have serious cash in the bank when you’re finished with all this drama. We’re guessing that makes it worth it to you!

by (@missmuttoo)

DMX Back To Where He Started… Jail

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We would not want to be in DMX‘s shoes right now. Here’s what’s happening in a nutshell:

In terms of the scales, he’s tipped way up crap-creek. And in a funny way, he’s coming full circle slammer-style. Look at his pattern: He was sentenced to jail earlier this year in March because he violated probation. And he was in the clink for verbally threatening a guard during his jail sentence last year while he was in for drug possession, animal cruelty and theft.

A 2002 reckless driving sentence was the original criminal culprit. DMX was smart enough not to contest the crime, which earned him probation. Unfortunately, he wasn’t smart enough to not screw up his probation terms…AGAIN. It’s like DMX deja-vu! He’s back in jail for 90 days.

Question is, will he managed to pull a Lohan and get out early? They both got the same 3 month term. Maybe his prison will be overcrowded too?

[Photo: Getty Images]

by (@missmuttoo)

Lawyer Quits On Eve Of Lindsay Lohan’s Judgment Day

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What did Lindsay Lohan do now? Her new attorney, Robert Shapiro, has quit just hours before Lindsay has to turn herself in today. So who’s repp’ing her? Shapiro had said that he would be her lawyer only if Lilo agreed to jail time and if she would consent to following his lead. Maybe that’s the problem, because Lindsay has been driving everyone bananas. Lindsay refused to listen to her previous lawyer, Shawn Chapman Holley, and we guess she had a hard time listening to Shapiro too. He peaced out after Lindsay checked out of his sober house yesterday.

Here’s where it gets interesting: Shawn Chapman Holley may have quit as her lawyer but she never signed the substitution of attorney form, which means she’s probably going to have to step in…again. Sources say that Chapman Holley will accompany Lohan to as she goes to court to start her 90 day sentence today.  Another source revealed, “Shawn never really left, Bob had been there guiding us… he was great, but he was just consulting, that’s all he ever was.”

The Deputy District Attorney Danette Meyers has advised Lindsay to show up today regardless of lawyer drama. “My advice to the defendant, Ms. Lohan, is to show up tomorrow, on time. If not, the People will be asking for a bench warrant, immediately.” Sources say the Lindsay will be there, even though she’s terrified. “She’ll be there in court. Lindsay’s in a really good place. We’re all in a really good place… but, you know she’s scared. It’s just a compete circus.”

In the hours leading to her going to the slammer, Lindsay tweeted, “the only “bookings” that i’m familiar with are Disney Films, never thought that i’d be “booking” into Jail… eeeks” Oh sweetie, your Disney days are long gone.  Does this shot of Lindsay, dressed as nun licking a gun for her film Machete, look Disney to you?

[Photo: Getty Images]

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Can We Put Paris Hilton In Jail With Lindsay, Please?

Paris Hilton was reportedly busted for pot again, this time on the French island of Corsica. The wonk-eyed starlet arrived to the island on a private jet on July 16, and after she landed police at the airport found a gram of marijuana on her but released her. Wait, what? Did these French cops go to the same police academy as the guy who found coke in Lindsay Lohan‘s possession and threw it out thinking it was a crushed Altoid?

This is Paris’ second pot bust in two weeks. She was also questioned by South African police while she was in the country for the World Cup on July 2. In that instance, she was not charged and claimed someone else in her party was smoking weed, and Tweeted later “Everything is fine guys. I had nothing to do with it.” In his weekend’s bust she also used Twitter to assure us all that she’s innocent, saying “Just to put an end to these rumours. The stories saying I have been arrested are completely false! I am having the best vacation of my life! What an amazing summer! I feel so blessed and grateful for everything. I Love Life!! Now let’s move on and everyone focus and enjoy their own summer time! Love you guys!”

OMG, love you too, Par-Par! Now seriously, what does it take to get this girl arrested? This is sort of ridiculous that she’s let off so easily despite being busted so often. It’s not like she’s in a dorm trying to blow off a suspicious R.A., these are real police.  Look, we don’t think marijuana requires a Brokedown Palace-style punishment, but something’s seriously wrong when you can get caught twice with it and not even receive a wrist slap. Sigh. Where’s Judge Marsha Revel when you need her?

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Tila Tequila Says ‘No’ To Rehab

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It’s a sad day in the world of reality television when notorious reality show celeb Tila Tequila avoids doing one. Even though she was allegedly the first to sign on for the next season of VH1′s Celebrity Rehab With Dr. Drew: RadarOnline reports Tila has withdrawn from the show.

Tila was by far the second best candidate for Dr. Drew’s drug rehabilitation show, behind Lindsay Lohan of course, and we’re woefully devastated that she won’t be healing herself on VH1 anytime soon. Tila exemplified the three important qualities necessary to be on the addictive (pun intended) show: deranged, delusional and very clearly drugged-up. Remember, Tila announced at the time of signing on for the show that she wanted to get over her prescription drug addiction, so the girl clearly needs help.

Even Tila’s reps gave no reasoning for suddenly backing out, simply saying “no” when RadarOnline asked if the Shot At Love star was still signed on. Hmmmm…maybe “Jane,” Tila’s alter-ego told her not to do the show. Jane, afterall, was the one who was behind the Tila’s terrible suicide hoax.

[Photo: GettyImages]