We know how upset you where when you first heard they were moving G.I. Joe: Retaliation from its June 29, 2012 release date to March 29, 2013 in order to accommodate reshoots. Oh, sorry. We meant to say: we know how upset you where when they originally moved G.I. Joe: Retaliation from its June 29, 2012 release date to March 29, 2013 in order to accommodate reshoots because Channing Tatum is in it. If you were peeved then, you’re going to be even more peeved now that we know the film’s new footage contains no new Channing Tatum. So basically it was a total waste, is what we’re implying. And by “implying,” we mean “screaming at a dark and unfeeling sky.”
“That is a complete rumor. I don’t know where that started,” G.I. Joe: Retaliation Lorenzo di Bonaventura told Crave Online. “Literally, Channing shot for – if I have it wrong, I’m off by an hour – four hours, five hours? So it wasn’t really about that at all.” Di Bonaventura then went on to explain that the production had shot for three more days, though offered no explanation for why the movie is not just 72 hours of Channing Tatum going about his day. The John Chu movie is still scheduled to drop this spring, though we’re sure we’ll be busy on March 29. Busy crying on a pile of 21 Jump Street DVDs, that is.
[Photo: Splash News Online]
To quote my boss, “Nooooooo, Joe!” (Only with more Os.) This was a reaction to the news that Paramount has decided to move G.I. Joe: Retaliation from its scheduled June 29 release to March 29, 2013. According to Deadline, this is because the studio would like to convert the whole thing to 3D. Wait, so we will now get to see the bulging biceps of Channing Tatum, Dwayne Johnson, Adrianne Palicki, D.J. Cotrona and Bruce Willis in three dimensions?
The John Chu-directed flick has a better chance of making big bucks overseas with 3D effects added, not to mention Channing Tatum won’t be competing against his own abs, which will be so lovingly displayed in Magic Mike, which is still coming out on June 29.
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[Photo: Paramount Pictures]
Sorry, Snow White. Nothing personal, Thor. Of course we still love you, the Batman. We always will. It’s just that when it comes to summer movies, we love a glowering villain as much as we love a virtuous hero. Maybe a little more. Maybe … a lot more.
Luckily for us (and you!), this summer’s films are jam-packed with some of the most malevolent evil characters imaginable, ready to face off against the hottest heroes and heroines from May to August. Tom Hiddleston reprises his Thor role as power-hungry extraterrestrial Loki in this week’s The Avengers, while Flight of the Concords’ Jemaine Clement breaks Will Smith‘s stride as an easy-riding alien by the name of Boris in Men in Black III. Closer to home (and to your childhood nightmares), Queen Charlize Theron goes after Kristen Stewart‘s heart (not in the romantic way) in Snow White and the Huntsman, while Eva Green does the same to Johnny Depp (in both the romantic and evil way?) as smitten witch Angelique Bouchard in Dark Shadows.
Of course, not every memorable villain has to be from another planet or or the fairy-tale realm. Some of them can be regular ol’ criminal masterminds, like Salma Hayek‘s drug kingpin Elena in Savages, Faran Tahir‘s Cobra Commander in G.I. Joe: Retaliation, Bryan Cranston‘s Vilos Cohaagen in the Total Recall remake and Edward Norton‘s Byer in The Bourne Legacy. We are especially psyched to see Tom Hardy‘s Bane grapple the Caped Crusader in The Dark Knight Rises while Rhys Ifans takes on Andrew Garfield in The Amazing Spider-Man. Because what’s an epic battle scene with out an epic villain? A 15-second slap fight?
Not that every villain has to be locked in life-or-death combat, mind you. Some of them are just maniacally vain. Sacha Baron Cohen‘s General Aladeen in The Dictator, anyone? Catherine Zeta-Jones‘ high-strung Patricia Whitmore will also be inflicting all the damage she can against the demon that is rock in Rock of Ages, while Adam Sandler only accidentally ruins his son Andy Samberg‘s wedding/marriage/life. That being said, if you somehow get your only child to throw up on his fiance’s wedding dress … yeah, you’re the bad guy.
Finally, we have to give props to those villains who don’t even come in a humanoid package. We are dying to see what the surprisingly awesome-looking Battleship aliens look like under their masks (Weird eyes? Check! Four-fingered hand? Check!), and we’re all ready to take our hats off to the Piranhas 3DD piranhas. Not only are they blood-thirsty, they are also responsible for Ving Rhames‘ character having machine gun legs. What aren’t villains good for? Which big bad has your ticket-buying hands shaking with anticipation this summer? Check out our gallery of villainy, and cast your vote. Just remember: When it comes to picking a favorite archnemesis, there is no wrong choice.
As the poet laureate Beyonce once said: Girls rule the world. And for proof, look no further than this summer’s biggest blockbuster movies. It’s the Summer Movie Preview week here at VH1 Celebrity, and we’ve already brought you our picks for the sexiest heroes coming soon to a theater near you. The hottest months of the year are going to real scorchers thanks to these badass beauties busting bad guys on the big screen.
Anne Hathaway steps into Catwoman’s famous leather jumpsuit for the much-anticipated Batman follow-up, The Dark Knight Rises, while Scarlett Johansson is back in her Black Widow gear for The Avengers. Kristen Stewart is getting medieval on our behinds with Snow White and the Huntsman, and Jessica Biel is fast-forwarding us into the year 2084 in the remake of Total Recall.
There are some new faces to the blockbuster game this year, like Friday Night Lights star Adrianne Palicki, who stars in G.I. Joe: Retaliation, and Battleship‘s Rihanna. Emma Stone gets to hook up with real-life beau Andrew Garfield in The Amazing Adventures of Spider-Man and Rachel Weisz might be doing the same onscreen with her Bourne Legacy co-star Jeremy Renner.
Whether they’re cartoons like Princess Merida in Pixar’s latest epic Brave, or real live ladies like Prometheus star Noomi Rapace, you can be sure that these women aren’t afraid to get their hands dirty while they save the rest of us — but they’ll still look amazing doing it. Our question to you is: Which of these heroic ladies are you most looking forward to seeing this summer? Check out the gallery and let us know in our poll!
Bikini season is coming soon, people, but you should not be worried. Dwayne Johnson’s G.I. Boot Camp will whip you into shape just in time. Oh, what’s that? This is the new trailer for G.I. Joe: Retaliation, not an ad for the Rock’s new workout program? Maaaaybe. We do seem to recall seeing a lot of explosions and robots and an evil robot president impersonator guy (and only 2 seconds of Channing Tatum, which should be a federal crime, but whatever). But mostly, what’s sticking in our mind is some major inspiration to hit the gym right now. Here are the basic selling points of the G.I. Joe workout:
Looking this good in a simple T-shirt is difficult, but it is the best way to rally a group around your rogue operation to save the world. Roadblock (Johnson) will show you how.