hillary clinton

by (@shalapitcher)

Christina Aguilera Talks Hillary Clinton On Ellen, Launches A Million Slash Fiction Stories

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We all had a good chuckle over that photo of Hillary Clinton gazing down at Christina Aguilera‘s ample cleavage at October’s 2012 George McGovern Leadership Award Ceremony, where Xtina was being honored for helping starving children, not for having a nice rack. Little did we know that the admiration between the Secretary of State and the Voice judge was completely mutual.

“She’s such a force in a room, she’s just got that star charisma, and everything about her I just — I couldn’t take my eyes off her either, so it was mutual,” Christina told Ellen DeGeneres in a segment taped for today’s show.

“Wow. Well,” was Ellen’s response. And now we can picture a million slash fiction writers coming up with steamy romances between the two divas.

“I’m so inappropriate!” Christina said apologetically. Well, that’s how we love you best — but you weren’t the one staring at a public official’s assets, btw.

Christina Aguilera loved the admiration Hillary Clinton showed her at an awards ceremony in October

[Photo: Getty Images]

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Chelsea Clinton’s Wedding To Cost $2 Million

No, that’s not a picture of Hillary Clinton being sworn in as Secretary of State, she’s actually involved in a secret pre-wedding ritual that rich people have. What she’s actually saying is “I, the mother of the bride, solemnly swear to shell out a sh*t-ton of money for my only daughter’s upcoming ceremony so that people will call it the wedding of the century.” Because Chelsea Clinton‘s wedding is reported to cost around $2 million. Excuse us while we cry into the irregular hanky we bought at Filene’s Basement.

What could possibly cost that much anyway? According to Politics Daily, the Clintons are spending up to $200,000 for the venue (Astor Courts in Rhinebeck, NY), $40,000 for the band (for that money, it had better be all four Beatles, living and dead), $250,000 on flowers (how is this even possible?) and TMZ reports that the glamorous port-a-potties the Clintons are renting will cost $15,000. To that we ask, if they’re spending that much money in the first place, why are the Clintons not holding the wedding in a place with real toilets?

Maybe the reason we find this all so offensive is that we’re the same age as Chelsea. When she went through her awkward phase, we were going through our awkward phase. When she was adjusting to life in Washington, D.C., we were adjusting to life in a new town, too. And after college, we both moved to New York City. That  teeny tiny bit of her that we identified with is all gone now. Now that we realize that her rental toilets alone cost more than our dream wedding.

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Chelsea Clinton Engaged

Chelsea Clinton is engaged to boyfriend Marc Mezvinsky, representatives for former President Bill Clinton confirmed to ABC News. The pair announced their engagement the day after Thanksgiving.

We’re sorry for the mass email but we wanted to wish everyone a belated Happy Thanksgiving! We also wanted to share that we are engaged! We didn’t get married this past summer despite the stories to the contrary, but we are looking toward next summer and hope you all will be there to celebrate with us. Happy Holidays! Chelsea & Marc.

Chelsea is the only child of Bill and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton. Mezvinsky, the son of two former U.S. Representatives (father Ed served a multi-year prison term for fraud, ending in 2008), is an investment banker who has known Clinton since adolescence—even attending Stanford with her—though the pair did not begin dating until 2007. The National Enquirer erroneously reported in April that they were set to marry last summer.

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by (@katespencer)

Obama’s Speech Writer Busted Groping Hillary Pic

Jon Favreau (no, not the actor) is best known as the young, bright and ambitious speech writer for Barack Obama. But now the 27-year-old whiz kid has a whole new reputation to embrace – juvenile, dumb, and tacky – after a photo of him groping a Hillary Clinton cut-out (while a friend kisses her lips and holds a beer at her face) leaked onto Facebook for a couple of hours. All photos from Favreau’s Facebook page have now been removed, but that did not stop the image from spreading across the web. The man of many words has currently gone silent, aside for a rumored apology issued to Hillary’s camp.

The future Secretary of State downplayed the drama, and her spokesman jokingly told the Washington Post that “Senator Clinton is pleased to learn of Jon’s obvious interest in the State Department, and is currently reviewing his application.” However others have not been so kind. Former Clinton Press Secretary DeeDee Myers wrote in Vanity Fair of the photo: “It’s an act of deliberate humiliation. Of disempowerment. Of denigration.”

What do you think – is the pic a stupid joke gone wrong, or a serious, sexist slam?

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SNL: Sarah Palin’s A MILF

Even if you’ve overdosed on politics during this election, you shouldn’t miss Saturday Night Live‘s skit last night of Sarah Palin and Hillary Clinton making a joint nonpartisan appearance to stand up against sexism. Tina Fey, who looks uncannily like the vice presidential candidate without even trying, hilariously nailed Palin as a “mouse-gutting” Alaskan who believes “global warming is just God huggin’ us closer” and is adept at foreign policy because she can see Russia from her house. But the funniest quips of the night came after Amy Poehler, lampooning Clinton as a bitter “boner-shrinker,” called for an end to sexism, and the two comedians launched into a tirade of complaints:

Palin: “So please stop photoshopping my head on sexy bikini pictures.”

Clinton: “Stop saying I have kankles.”

Palin: “Don’t refer to me as a MILF.”

Clinton: “And don’t refer to me as a flirg. I Googled it and I do not like it.”

It’s up for debate whether Palin would make a good vice president, but no one can argue that she doesn’t make for great comedy. Bonus: fake Sarah Palin bikini pic after the jump.

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