by (@hallekiefer)

Miley Cyrus Shoots Down Breast Implant Rumors

Guess we’re not the only ones who noticed Miley Cyrus’s amazing curves this past weekend. It makes sense; we’re not the only people with eyes. Apparently a large enough percentage of Miley’s following had questions regarding the authenticity of her lady lumps that Cyrus felt the need to clear some things up. Two things, to be precise. Her boobs. Are we being clear enough yet? You just let us know!

“Thank you for the compliment, but these babies are all mine,” Miley Cyrus posted to Twitter. “I wish [people would] realize you don’t have to be fake to be beautiful!” Later the singer turned to science to point out, “I’m 19! BOOBS GROW, PEOPLE!” Check out our three Mileys above for further proof, if you need it: The first photo on the left is from this year’s Clive Davis’ pre-Grammy Gala on February 12, the second is from Nickelodeon’s Kids’ Choice Awards on April 2, and the third is from this Sunday. So, unless Miley has access to plastic surgery technology the rest of us haven’t even heard of yet (which is possible), we’re putting our money on some quality brassieres and a few rolls of double-sized tape. And prayer. Lots and lots of prayer.

[Photo: Getty Images]

by (@hallekiefer)

Heather Morris Got Breast Implants, Promptly Removed Them

We often have to remind ourselves that she is not the same person as her Glee character, but doesn’t the fact that Heather Morris got breast implants then immediately took them out a very Britney-esque thing to do? Talking about it in public certainly is.

“Implants were something I thought I wanted when I was younger, and now I don’t,” the actress/dancer told Fitness magazine. “It was hard being active with them, because my chest was always sore. It hurt a lot, and I didn’t like always being in pain, so they had to go!” We’re imagining Heather decided that in the parking lot after walking out of the hospital. Here’s the thing: in addition to being our favorite bisexual cheerleader, Heather Morris has never looked anything short of insanely hot just as she is. We’re imagining stabbing chest pains probably wouldn’t have added to her appeal.

by (@hallekiefer)

Victoria Beckham Gets Her “Torpedo Bazookas” Taken Out

In case you had ever wondered why David Beckham was walking around with two perfectly spherical bruises on his chest, news comes today that Victoria Beckham had her breast implants removed. In a new interview with Vogue UK, Beckham reveals the change to reporter Lisa Armstrong, who writes of the fashionista, “No French manicures. No torpedo bazookas, either. ‘Gone,’ she announces.” Victoria is reportedly seeking a less processed appearance, rather than the “two grapefruits bolted to a mannequin and spray-painted orange” look she’s been rocking for the past decade.

Beckham had previously side-stepped implant rumors, even going to far as describing herself as “completely natural, except for my fingernails and I have a bit of help with my hair and a bit of a San Tropez going on.” We don’t know if “natural” is really the world for it if her fake tan alone was approaching Chernobyl-levels of toxicity. Victoria has also said before that  she looks “really awful naked” due to childbirth. But from what we can see from outside her clothes, going down a few sizes has to be a huge improvement.

by (@hallekiefer)

Christina Gets Dirrty In Leaked NSFW Photos


If Xtina wants to revert from classy legitimate actress to raunchy “Dirrty”-era diva, who are we to object? In what looks like the first step down that road, leaked photos of Christina Aguilera hit the internet today to remind us of the singer in a better, racier time: 2002. The candid photos depict Aguilera in all kinds of undress, including two pics taken while she’s dressed in what appears to be a revealing costume from her bonerific Not Myself Tonight video. Why celebrities would agree to take raunchy photos when they know they’ll just end up being leaked us beyond us…especially one with so many horrible leg bruises!

Arguably even less pleasant for the singer are possible photos of Aguilera’s breast implant scars, which the singer inadvertently revealed while waving during the Tokyo junket for her film Burlesque. Christina has never directly addressed gossip about her assets, but the scar suggests breast augmentation performed via the armpit. To which we say—ugh. Between the singer’s pits, nips and various skin issues, we feel like we’ve had our fill of Xtina for the day. Unless more sexy photos come out: then please, alert us immediately. [Photo: Global Grind]

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