We’ve hyperventilated before about the massive amount of cash the Jersey Shore cast earns for eating pickles and falling out of their platforms, so we’ll spare you our hysterics. Just know that we are literally eating ramen while we writing the words: “several Jersey Shore cast members earn $2.55 million dollars a season.” According to RadarOnline, that is. Interested to know the alleged breakdown of each cast member’s salary? Do you screen your phone calls because Sallie Mae is after you about your unpaid student loans? The answer to both of these queries, we’re assuming, is yes:
- Snooki, The Situation and Pauly D: As denoted by the fact they all have nicknames, this trifecta are the top Jersey dogs, reportedly pull in $150,000 per episode, not counting the $400,000 signing bonus they allegedly raked in at the beginning of the show’s most recent season, a $200,000 end-of-season bonus and any additional reunion episodes. With 12 episodes a season….carry the one and…yup, we were fools to go to grad school. A Master’s in Fine Arts?!?! What were we thinking?
- JWoww & Vinny: Jennie pulls in $100,000 an ep, while Vinny gets $90,000. If you calculated out their hour wage, you’d realize they basically earn $10,000 every time they fall asleep in a tanning bed. Read more…
If we could devote all our time and energy to a site specifically dedicated to sick wheelies, boy would we! Is sickwheelies.com even available? (Note: good lord, it is! Quick, someone make our dreams come true!). Clearly the Jersey Shore cast is on the same page as we are, given how much pleasure Pauly D, Snooki and JWoww got out of the electric scooters they had while filming today. Can totally unnecessary Rascals and Jazzy carts become a thing, please? Walking is so over, as far as we’re concerned. Live in the now, people! Scooters are the new legs!
We’re assuming the scooters came into play after JWoww was injured in a bar brawl this weekend. At first we though pregnant Snooki must need a cart too, then we realized that doesn’t actually make sense. Does it? Snooki’s probably spending most of her time flopped on a beanbag chair anyway. We just hope that when we’re massively pregnant, we’ll get the opportunity to rip wheelies down the streets of Seaside. No, you’re right. Why just hope for something amazing…when we can start saving up for our very own pregnancy scooter today? You’re so smart, The Internet.
[Photo: Splash News Online]
They’re ba-ack! We’re not sure if this is a good thing, but for better or worse, the cast of Jersey Shore are up to shenanigans again, during what seemed to be quite a busy weekend. First up, is Deena Cortese. The photograph you see on the right is of her being escorted out of the Seaside Heights Police Department by her parents after being detained by the cops for disorderly conduct. TMZ also has a video of her being arrested after filming her, possibly drunkenly, walking and dancing in the middle of the street. The police didn’t find her behavior amusing at all, and cuffed her, as cast mates Ronnie and Sammi watched.
Then we saw these photographs of Jenni “JWoww” Farley hobbling around on crutches with her ankle all bandaged up. We would have total sympathy for her if it wasn’t for the fact that her injury was sustained during a bar brawl over the weekend, again. Ronnie, Roger, Pauly D and The Situation got into a fight with two dudes, who are planning on suing them now. They claim that Ronnie and Roger attacked them, but now sources say that the two men were provoking the Jersey Shore dudes all night. The sources also say that one of the two guys said he would “knock them out” and tried to punch Pauly. That’s when everything got heavy and the Shore guys are claiming self defence. JWoww was there too and ended up as collateral damage! We feel bad, but at the same time … getting into a fight at a bar? Again?
[Photos: Splash News Online]
She just doesn’t know how to quit you, bro. Jersey Shore‘s preeminent love birds Sammi and Ronnie were caught canoodling outside a hotel in New Jersey today on this, the first day of filming for JS‘s new season. Call us crazy, but we’re pretty certain that kiss is the real deal. After seeing their relationship unfold almost entirely in public, we think it’s fair to say these guys are basically our generation’s Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton. Or they definitely are, seeing as how virtually no one who watches Jersey Shore will understand or care about that reference.
Maybe we’re the only ones that didn’t see this coming, but we were 99% certain these two were over and done and had already moved on as of last year. “We are not together,” Sammi declared in October after the gang had returned from their fourth season abroad in Italy. During this spring’s Jerseyliciousfifth season, Sam and Ron were so laid-back about their love, we…well, we assumed they had quietly broken up and the show just didn’t get into it. How could we not think that? Remember how insane their relationship was in the third season? Remember The Incident With Sammi’s Glasses? We still wake up in a cold sweat just thinking about it, but good luck, you two! It’s like everyone says: sixth season’s the charm!
[Photo: Splash News Online]
Bar Refaeli topped the Maxim 2012 Hot 100 list and we listed 30 steamy reasons why she deserved that honor. In keeping with tradition, where there’s a “Hot 100 List” there must be a Hot 100 party. And there was one, but we were a little disappointed by the turn out. The Maxim bash took place at the Dream Downtown in New York last night and Bar held court in a black jumpsuit with a keyhole neckline. But not many other celebrities turned up on the red carpet. None of the top 10 were there. Instead, folks like Makim Chmerkovskiy and his brother Valentin showed up. So did Lance Bass, who, surprise surprise, got another guest pretty worked up, but in a totally fangirl way.
Spotted after a long time, was Jenni “JWoww” Farley in a tight, lowcut black dress, red extensions and rakish black boots. Where ya been, Jenni? The Jersey Shore star tweeted a picture with Bass from the event, which got her gal-pal and co-star Snooki all hot and bothered. Snooki tweeted JWoww immediately, saying, “Your such a w—e I’ve loved him since N*sync. Don’t talk to me.” Could JWoww be working it more than Bar? We demand a recount!
[Photos: Splash News Online]
Related: Bar Refaeli Is #1 On Maxim‘s 2012 Hot 100 List: Here Are 30 Reasons Why
Snooki and fiance Jionni LaValle are expecting a boy in September, she says in
a story she sold to the new issue of In Touch magazine. We are kind of disappointed that we won’t immediately get to see the kind of animal print minidresses she’d put a daughter in, and it sounds like the 24-year-old Jersey Shore star is too. “I thought it was going to be a girl. I was hoping it would be, because all girls want girls,” she admits, before adding, “It’s still my baby, no matter what. I’m excited either way!”
In the story, she also reveals the typical pregnancy woes: “Our sex life is hardly there! I just feel too icky and gross.” Also, her cravings include “anything cold and juicy, like Italian ices.” (Uh-oh, we can hear the Italian ice lobby complain of being poorly represented already.) And In Touch must have given Snooki a sweet deal, because she also told them which names they’re considering, Lorenzo or Jionni Jr.
The surprising bit of this article? This statement: “I’m not going to party hard anymore, even after the baby is born.” There goes all of our TV fun.
[Photos: In Touch, Getty Images]
Related: The Situation Opens Up About His Pain Killer Addiction, Rehab And Apologizing To Snooki
Snooki Shows Off Her Growing Baby Bump, New Taste In Long Dresses
It’s been two months since news broke that The Situation was headed to rehab for a prescription pain killer addiction. Now the Jersey Shore star is ready to come clean about what exactly put him in treatment. “Ever since I’ve been out, I’m not going to lie, it’s not easy,” Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino admits to MTV in a series of interviews. “I’m at a good place, but it took a little bit to get there. In the beginning, there were a lot of rainy days.” The Sitch says he started taking meds to deal with his grueling schedule, though denies abusing alcohol or any other drug, despite what those sweaty Karma nights would make you believe. “Obviously, people have seen me with a drink in my hand, but I was never drunk. I’m a ladies man,” Mike laughs. “You can’t get girls if you can’t speak to them!” Well, if anyone can, it’s him. But point taken!
It wasn’t until Mike struggled to pull himself together for an event in Australia that those in his camp realized that Sorrentino needed professional help. Oh, and there was one other red flag. “Once I stopped going to the gym, the family started immediately noticing,” the Sitch admits. As for rehab itself, the process of getting off drugs sounds like a punishing one. “Your health, your mind, your body, it’s not coming back as quick as you like,” Mike says about detoxing. “Your emotions come back like a ton of bricks…it feels like you’re not going to recover. It feels like an impossible deed.”
“Honestly I really didn’t know I could make a baby. So the fact I can reproduce is really scary.” And with those priceless words, the trailer for the upcoming Snooki & JWoww show makes us a promise. A promise to give us so much bronzed insanity come June 3, our minds will be reduced to a pile of Red Bull cans, baby blankets and crimson weave. We would feel ashamed at our level of excitement about seeing it if we didn’t know you secretly feel the exact same way. So…want to see Snooki‘s ultrasound from the trailer again? We know you do:
We always suspected Pauly D was doing alright for himself, what with the 50 Cent and Britney Spears collabos. And that’s not even considering the monies he made beating up the beat for his spin-off The Pauly D Project. In case you were wondering exactly how much the Jersey Shore star is pulling in, however, a new lawsuit brought by his former management company claims it is, to put it bluntly, a buttload. According to the complaint filed by ICM, the talent agency allegedly helped Pauly wrangle $100,000 an episode for Season Four, in addition to a “$200,000 ‘thank you’ bonus.” For Season 5, he earned $150,000 per episode and a $400,000 signing bonus. Hey, remember when Pauly and Vinny spent an entire episode moving patio furniture into the living room as a practical joke? Yeah, we need to go lie down for a minute before we finish this post.
As the result of the deals it finagled for him, ICM claims Pauly owes them $370,000 for the dough he’s already raked in, as well as “a minimum of $210,000” from the next season.“We are surprised by ICM’s contention that it is due commissions after ICM was terminated in favor of William Morris Endeavor,” the reality star’s lawyer Hilary Hughes said in a statement today. ”ICM was paid for its services.” If not, it ain’t no thing: Pauly D is allegedly signed on for Season 6…at $175,000 an episode. So why would the cast ever leave this show? With salaries like this, we expect to see Snooki‘s baby graduate from med school on TV. On a related note, do they have a med school in the back of that t-shirt shop?
[Photo: Getty Images]
You guys, quickly! Angelina Pivarnick here and she has some important information regarding The Situation’s prescription pill problem! Somehow she has this information despite the fact she was his costar for a sum total of about 45 minutes! The important part is, everyone is paying attention to Angelina! “When he was on the show, he got in trouble for having prescription pills. We were filming in a club in Miami ,” Angelina told Page Six. “One of the producers said, ‘Hey what was that?’ He had to give them up.” Hearing one of the Sitch’s ex-cast mates discuss the particulars of his alleged substance abuse makes us raise our Ron-Ron juice to all of the Jersey Shore housemates who aren’t blabbing about the issue. Unless of course TMZ is right in it’s allegations that the Sitch is also receiving treatment for an alcohol problem, in which case we’ll pour this right back into the blender where it came from.
While the Situation admitted yesterday on his blog that “I have voluntarily taken steps to get control of a prescription medication problem I had due to exhaustion,” Angelina instead describes him as being like “Popeye on Crack” during their brief time together. Girl, come on! Popeye? Sure! But let’s leave the crack out of this. “Angelina is up to her dirty little hamster ways again,” the Situation tweeted this afternoon. Hey! Angelina gets attention, and we get to picture her gnawing on a toilet paper roll to make a nest! Looks like this story turned out to be a win-win after all.
[Photo: Getty Images/ Splash News Online]