Jon Gosselin

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Dream Reality Show: Jon And Nadya Plus 22

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We hate to add fuel the fame-whoring fire of Jon Gosselin and the Octomom, but the rumors of the two joining forces for reality television are too awesomely disastrous for us to ignore. The Gosselin camp is already furiously denying the dating show, but we’re holding out hope for the 22 children-deep couple. 

TMZ allegedly obtained a copy of the pitch for the duo’s show, in which it boldly states that the “Jon + Nadya” show would challenge the ratings of “American Idol.” While that’s a lofty statement, they could count on viewership from theFABlife. We’re suckers for a good trainwreck. [Source: NY Daily News, TMZ; Photo: Splash News Online]

Related FABlife content: Jon Gosselin Denies Octomom Dating Show, Teams With Rabbi For Public Apology

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A New Low For JoGo?

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While Jon Gosselin‘s arrival at his twins’ birthday party turned out to be a non-event (Kate let him stay until the children went to bed), his arrival in Reading was not without amusement.

As Daddy waited for Mady & Cara’s bus with his paparazzi friends, an enterprising young dog waste remover known by the alias “Mr. Scoop” arrived, possibly because someone reported a piece of s— in the parking lot. Seizing the opportunity to publicize his poop scooping venture, Mr. Scoop asked JoGo to pose with him by his truck. While confused, everyone’s favorite allegedly reluctant reality star was happy to do so. Maybe he empathized with Mr. Scoop’s enterprising spirit.

Frankly, JoGo was more appropriately dressed to help Mr. Scoop with a payload than to spend some quality time with kids. It’s a birthday party for 9-year-olds, bro, not a kegger at Juniata College. Clean up.

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Does Jon Gosselin Want Off Reality TV Or Not?

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TMZ announced yesterday that Jon Gosselin had “sworn off reality shows—forever!” But nothing he’s said since suggests he’s planning to retire. Discussing estranged wife Kate’s goofy appearance on Leno last night, JoGo rather hypocritically sighed “it’s messed up, the timing,” before taking a more diplomatic stance. “What she does on TV, that’s her career. I’m happy for her career. I hope she can be happy for my career [and] we can have a career on TV, kind of together, but our kids will come off.” Woah, woah, Jon wants a “career on TV,” “kind of together” with Kate? What are they going to do without the cute spawn, review movies?

In further “hypocritical loser” news, it looks like JoGo’s decision to play up Mady and Cara’s impending birthday party like a wrestling match (“It could be World War III when I get home!”) may have been to hawk Entertainment Tonight‘s “live feed” of his arrival at the Pennsylvania mansion. So he doesn’t want his kids being filmed, but he’s going to show up at the birthday party with cameras? Your horns are showing, JoGo.

[Photo: Getty Images]

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Jon Gosselin Promises Scene At Twins’ B-Day Tomorrow

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Jon Gosselin has complained before that he has no friends—which might explain why he keeps blabbing with tabloids and  paparazzi. Sitting down with Entertainment Tonight, JoGo once again denied having the hundreds-of-thousands estranged wife Kate accused him of swiping, adding that she’s probably off telling the kids that he’s evil for not letting the nice cameramen film them any more. “‘Oh, daddy’s put a halt on filming. Your friends are going to go away.’ She probably worded it in a way that’s a violation to them, or their sense of security.” Bet she took away their toys, too.

While the court hearing over the missing moolah has been delayed for a week due to the death of the judge’s wife (poor guy has to come back to this after the funeral?), it shouldn’t put a damper in the ongoing drama. While taking a cigarette break with a mic-wielding pap from TMZ today, Jon complained that Kate was asking him to only spend two hours at Mady & Cara’s birthday party tomorrow “due to recent events.” “It’s ridiculous, I can stay as long as I want,” Jon muttered, inadvertedly (or not) making sure that the photographers will be salivating extra hard outside of the family compound. And you know those birthday girls are excited too! Maybe Nancy Grace will pop out of the cake.

[Photos: Getty Images]

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Jon Gosselin Says Kate’s Lying About Money Drama

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Kate Gosselin can sniffle on the Today show all she wants about not being able to pay bills, but JoGo ain’t having it! Daddy told The Insider that Mommy’s sob story is nothing but lies. Lies, lies, lies!

I withdrew $22,000 last Thursday. I have the paper trail to prove it…I’ve never taken any money out because over ten years, Kate handled all the banking. Over the past four years of doing the show, we accrued $2,250,000. She says in the past week I took $230,000. I have withdrawn roughly $177,000 over the course of a year, which is less than 10% of what we made. That’s like my paycheck…I believe she’s incriminating herself and not thinking clearly. She’s wanting me to look bad.

…She’s hiding money. We have 11 bank accounts. That was just our joint account. She had a best-selling book. Where’s that million dollars? I didn’t want these things to come public. I didn’t want this to be embarrassing for her.

TMZ suggests that the pair are up to their neck in debt—something JoGo might not understand if he doesn’t do the books—but if Kate lied to Meredith Viera about her poverty this morning, there will be hell to pay.

[Photo: Getty Images]

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Kate Gosselin And TLC Strike Back At “Self-Destructive” Jon

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It didn’t take long for either Kate Gosselin or TLC to react to Jon Gosselin‘s legal threats against Kate Plus 8. “I’m saddened and confused by Jon’s public media statements,” Mommy Dearest said in a statement. “Jon has never expressed any concerns to me about our children being involved in the show and, in fact, is on the record as saying he believes the show benefits our children and was taping on Friday with the kids…Jon used to [agree the show was beneficial] until as recently as the day the network announced the name change of the show and indicated that Jon would have a lesser role in the show…It appears that Jon’s priority is Jon and his interests. My priority remains our children and their well-being.”

If that wasn’t enough of a smackdown for you, The TLC Corporate Machine (as Dad’s showboating lawyer Mark Heller calls them) had this to say about Jonny Go-Go:

We are aware of Jon Gosselin’s recent statements, and remain deeply disappointed at his continued erratic behavior.  He and the family were shooting as recently as last Friday, without incident, and his latest comments are grossly inaccurate, without merit and are clearly opportunistic. Despite Jon Gosselin’s repeated self destructive and unprofessional actions, he remains under an exclusive contract with TLC.  Direct filming of the children has been currently suspended, pending further conversations between both parents.

Erratic? Self-destructive? Opportunistic? This is what happens when you spend too much time with Michael Lohan, folks. You go from being a put-upon husband everyone pities to an obnoxious attention whore who thinks people care about him as much as his lovable spawn. It’s contagious!

[Photo: Getty Images]

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Jon Gosselin To TLC: “Stop Filming My Kids!”

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Looks like there are more than eight little hostages in the Gosselin divorce drama. J-Dog is demanding TLC stop filiming his precious child-shaped bags of money until further notice. “Jon realized his family was like a trainwreck, so he decided to put the brakes on the divorce and on the show,” his laywer told The Insider, accusing TLC of failing to acquire numerous permits needed to go Truman Show on a kid. Gee, think this might have something to do with taking his name out of the show’s title?

Not only has Papa threatened to call the police if TLC won’t respect his authority, if this photoshopped-as-hell-looking sign outside the family’s house can be believed, “Johnathon” is so furious he can’t even spell his name right. Then again, with Jon off hitting the party circuit in LA, it’s not like he could have written the thing himself. Your move, Kate!

[Photo: Splash News Online]

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The Saddest Pics Of Kate Gosselin Ever

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These photos of Kate Gosselin tootin’ around on her son’s bike sent our heart strings a-shatterin’ yesterday. Sure, there’s nothing that weird about a parent chillin’ on their kid’s set of wheels, but compared to her ex Jon‘s vacation cruising around St. Tropez with his new girlfriend, it kinda made her look, well, sad.

Kate’s been vilified in the press for everything from denying her kids water to emasculating her husband, and it’s easy to forget that underneath that fake tan and terrifying  chop-bob hair, there’s a newly single mom of 8 just trying to figure her crazy life out. Her husband’s got a Harley, and Kate’s got training wheels. We can’t wait to watch what happens when they come off. [Photo: Splash News Online]

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Jon Gosselin Claimed Girlfriend Is Also His Stylist

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Just in case the comings and goings of Jon Gosselin weren’t creepy enough these days, now even Ed Hardy designer Christian Audigier is accusing Gosselin of not being entirely truthful. A rep for Audigier said that in order for Jon to be able to bring his girlfriend Hailey Glassman on a recent trip to St. Tropez, Gosselin claimed Glassman was his stylist. The rep said, “We said we could accommodate her going out there as long as she’s bringing his biker wardrobe or something relevant — motorcycles being the key the factor in all of this.” Maybe she pulled a suitcase filled with Jon’s clothes behind her the whole time and we just missed it?

The rep also told TV Guide that rumors that Audigier was talking to Gosselin about a children’s line are false, since the brand already has four. Really? Four? Kate Gosselin better be guarding those kids’ closets!  [Photo: Splash News Online]

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What Is Jon & Kate’s “Announcement”?

The promo for next week’s hour-long episode of Jon & Kate Plus 8 promises an “announcement” from the estranged couple, and seems pretty likely that they’ll reveal plans to divorce—what with all the sad music and alienated posing. Then again, maybe that’s just what they want us to think. Some other possibilities for the Gosselins:

  • Kate’s preggers again!
  • Kate is divorcing her haircut.
  • Jon will be leaving the show to replace Hugh Hefner on The Girls Next Door.
  • Realizing the stress the children have put on their marriage, Jon & Kate will be selling them to Angelia Jolie.
  • Failing that, the Octo-Mom.
  • And if that doesn’t work, eBay.
  • Despite the drama, Jon & Kate are determined to see this marriage through. They will continue to vacation separately and not look each other in the eye until their kids are grown—or TLC cancels the show, whichever comes first.