Okay, so we’re not really that angry. Just jelly that Gwyneth’s Coldplay frontman husband thought to make such a gigantic romantic gesture at their Miami concert last week. Like, Chris and Gwyneth might as well be on top of the Empire State building at this point. Or he could have come to her doorstep in the pouring rain and carried her upstairs. Well, we guess it would be their doorstep, which makes it slightly less sexy since he would have just opened the garage door and walked up the steps…look, our point is that everyone should be stopping every concert to kiss their spouses. Challenge made, every other married musician out there!
Whoever invented the Kiss Cam is truly the unsung hero of our time. In addition to making thousands of couples spontaneously smooch on television, he or she also managed to coax a sweetly awkward semi-make out from the lips of Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez at the Lakers vs Spurs game last night. Who else has that kind of power? Can any camera be a Kiss Cam, if you insist it loud enough to the other passengers on the F train?
These photos really bring us back to the first time we saw Justin and Selena kiss. Remember their extremely PG-13 vacation in Hawaii last May? And to think, these two have been together for over a year. How time flies when there isn’t some kind of horny camera trained on you 24/7! While the rest of the Staples Center was watching them, Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber were actually watching the game. “LET’S GO SPURS!!! LET’S GO!!,” Selena tweeted, along with a photo of her ticket. We guess it’s only right we don’t wield control over the Kiss Cam. If we did, these two would never stop kissing. Selena, what would you think about that? Seriously, be honest.
Katy Perry’s divorce is probably taking a devastating personal toll, but it must be a confidence booster knowing she can send another human being into cardiac arrest simply by laying one on him. We also appreciate this fan’s steez, which he demonstrated while attending Katy’s concert in Jakarta, Indonesia last night. What, you’re going to go to a Katy Perry concert, have her kiss up on you and not immediately have a brain aneurysm? That would just be a waste of money. Money that could be better spent buying a new shirt after Katy Perry’s blistering hotness melted yours off right off your torso.
Britney Spears, we have some awful news for you, which is why we brought over red wine, a copy of The Notebook, and a backup copy of The Notebook for when this one catches on fire from playing it 3,000 times. Okay, Brit, the truth isâ€¦Nicki Minaj kissed Madonna. “OH MY f’ingggg Gahhhh!!!!! MADONNA jus kissed me!!!!! On the lips!!!!!!! It felt sooooo good. Soooo soft!!!! *passes out* aaahhhhh!!!!!!!!!,” Nicki tweeted from the set of their upcoming music video. “No barbz…like…seriously…it felt soooooooooo good!!!!!!! Sooooo soft! Like what?!?!?! bwahahahhahahahahahaha!!!!” Britney, are you okay? Ugh, don’t get out the Madonna scrapbook. Please! It’s the third time this week.
The two were teamed up for Nicki Minaj’s guest spot on Madonna‘s upcoming single “Give Me All Your Love,” and apparently Madge, you know, did. Not only that, but in Nicki’s words their kiss wasâ€¦well, better than the one you shared with Madonna at the 2003 MTV VMAs. “It was more romantic. Bwaha!” Minaj swooned. We love you, girl, but we are not going to back you up in a fistfight over this. Especially not with Madonna; have you seen that woman’s arms?
OK, so Jason Bateman and Olivia Wilde’s fish-mouth kiss happened while filming The Longest Week in Brooklyn today, rather than, say, during a romantic date to the aquarium. That being said, that is truly one awkward lip lock. Are we all supposed to be opening our jaws that wide? Have we been doing it wrong this entire time? While we might personally prefer to do our weird, uncomfortable smooching in the privacy of our own homes, we do enjoy cringing at awkward PDAs, provided there are famous peeps involved. With that in mind, please enjoy some of our favorite awkward celeb PDAs. You know they did.
Does a mid-century biopic of former head of the FBI J. Edgar Hoover directed by Clint Eastwood sound a little dry? What if it had a significant amount of hot dude-on-dude kissing? Great, we’ll race to you to wait in line for two years! Over at ET Canada, the Lone Ranger’s Armie Hammer opened up about what it like to kiss costar J. Edgar‘s Leonardo Dicaprio for the upcoming film. “It’s the same kind of thing as if you walk onto a set and they hand you a machine gun and [say], ‘Shoot this like you know what you’re doing’ – you can’t grab that thing and go, ‘uh…’ – you kind of have to go, ‘Okay, I know what I’m doing,’ and you’ve just got to go for it,” Hammer said, in a delightfully phallic metaphor. “It wasn’t that weird – I have never kissed a guy – it’s not something I’m going to do in my private life, but at the end of it I was, like, man, there is a lot of weird hype.” WHY ISN’T THIS MOVIE OUT ALREADY? It feels like we’ve been waiting for a billion, trillion years to learn about Edgar Whatever His Name Is!
As for his friendship with erstwhile make-out buddy DiCaprio, Hammer adds, “You always have a special relationship with someone when you finish a movie with them, but…he’s got a bunch of stuff he is doing after that, I’ve got a bunch of stuff I’m doing….we didn’t start a book club together or anything,” Naw, man, just save it for the sequel. Save it for our dreams, and the sequel.
There you are, minding your business while the Lakers lose to the Dallas Mavericks, when all of a sudden you feel your lips being drawn slowly but surely towards your best friend’s mouth. You’re helpless to resist: the eyes of the kiss cam are upon you. Like two sweaty, adorable magnets, Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly kissed courtside at Game 1 of the Western Conference second series. At least the Step Brothers co-stars’ triumphant make-out gave fans something to watch that didn’t involve their home team getting destroyed. If the force of Ferrell and Reilly locking lips isn’t enough to bring home a win, what will? The kiss cam is giving it everything its little electronic heart can give!
We aren’t sayingCharlie Sheen kissing Jimmy Kimmel last night and Sheen needing a psych evaluation to see his sons are in any way related. We’re just saying as far as we know, very few celebrities will have to undergo both in their lifetime (hope you’re still doing well, Sarah Silverman!). “You lips are very moist,” Sheen tells Kimmel after dashing in and smooching him passionately during a Mark Cuban interview. After running through the audience handing out his merchandise, Sheen gifts Kimmel a mug with two cartoon foxes taped to the side, seemingly a reference to Sheen’s rumored Fox project. We’d say even fewer people can add a Fox show to their ever-growing stockpile of insane projects, but knowing that channel, it’s probably roughly the same.
As if that video isn’t enough evidence already, Sheen undergoing psychiatric examination was only a matter of time, regardless of Charlie’s latest clean drug test. According a source reporting to RadarOnline, “Charlie must submit to a mental health evaluation with a licensed professional before he can see Bob and Max. Charlie won’t see the boys until he sees a psychiatrist, that is someone neutral, that hasn’t previously treated him.” Sheen hasn’t submitted for a test yet; we’re assuming it’s because he’s too busy printing out pictures of foxes and pasting them to his dishware. Another thing so few famous people are doing these days…
Seriously? The one thing that would have jazzed up an otherwise super-beige Academy Awards, and we didn’t even get to see it? Many who attended the Academy Awards reported Josh Brolin and Javier Bardem kissed at the Oscars, right before they broke into a romantic little two step on-stage. We wouldn’t know, because the most important moment of the 2011 Oscars never reached our television. “It [the dance and the kiss] was unscripted, and the plan in the truck was always to cut to Penelope [Cruz] in the audience applauding Josh’s and Javier’s introduction,” Oscars producer Bruce Cohen explains. Well, we’ll have to watch the show again; if Penelope’s eyes bulge out of their sockets and her tongue unfurls to the ground, then we’ll know we’re definitely missing something great.
The gay news site AfterElton questioned whether homophobia kept Brolin and Bardem’s kiss off the air, a claim Cohen denies. We should hope not; it’s the only thing that would have made up for Anne Hathaway‘s musical number. “So that is what happened, just as they were starting to dance. Josh and Javier’s moment…would have made a great TV moment, but since no one knew it was coming, we cut to the gorgeous Mz. Cruz as planned,” Cohen said. “By the time, we cut back from her close-up, Josh and Javier were walking to the podium.” Next year the producers are going to have to be on their game to catch precious moments like these. Either that, or they can script them into the show. In which case, we will welcome James Franco back with open arms…and lips.