Kourtney And Kim Take Miami

by (@hallekiefer)

Kourtney Kardashian Wears 400% The Necessary Amount Of Pants While In Miami

Kourtney Kardashian Wears Giant Pants In Miami

Well, let’s just come out and say it: that is just too much pant! Kourtney Kardashian stepped out in Miami today wearing a mathematically-impossible amount of pants while shooting scenes for Kourtney And Kim Take Miami. You could make six pairs of Kourtney-sized pants out of those, easy. It’s not even that we’re saying they are ugly pants. They are just a ridiculous volume of pants. You know those infinity swimming pools? That look like they don’t have an edge because water pours over the side? These is exactly like that, except with pants. Infinity pants. What we’re trying to say is, the limit is zero.  The limit of Kourtney Kardashian’s pants does not exist!

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by (@JordanRuntagh)

Kim Kardashian Bounces From Miami Restaurant To Avoid Seeing Sex Tape Partner Ray J

Last year Ray J found himself seated on the same plane as Kris Humphries, who was at the time engaged to Ray’s former sex-tape partner Kim Kardashian. Needless to say, it made for something of an awkward flight. But now the R&B had an even closer call confronting his less than illustrious past, as he showed up at Miami’s Prime 112 restaurant; the very place that the whole Kardashian Klan were having a family dinner. Coming face to face with a whole pack of Kardashians is probably pretty terrifying in the best of occasions, but if you’re Ray J, it could very well have ended tragically.

Ray arrived at the restaurant on Sunday night to have dinner with his friend, boxer Floyd Mayweather. Apparently he was totally unaware that Kim and Co. were in the house because, hey, the world’s a big place. But the reality TV stars were there to mark the 9-year-anniversary of patriarch Robert Kardashian’s death. Ooof. We can’t think of a worse moment for your sex tape partner to make an unexpected appearance. Kim reportedly bounced from the place upon hearing that Ray J had arrived, being ushered out a side door as soon as she could. The most hilarious part is that the place was already swarmed with paparazzi because she had tweeted her dinner location earlier in the day! She probably could have done without that extra bit of attention. Let’s hope she at least had time for dessert!

[Photo: Getty Images]

by (@JordanRuntagh)

A Serious Critique Of The Kourtney And Kim Take Miami Promo Bikini Video

Kourtney and Kim Kardashian have already taken New York, and now they’re more than ready to take Miami! The reality sisters have released a poolside promo video for their upcoming spinoff, set to air this coming January. The bikini filled clip is getting us all hot and bothered, in more ways than one. There’s something sort of eerie and detached about the video, which features the voluptuous Kim diving into the deep end of a pool. Metaphor alert, anyone?

Things get weirder as she slides beneath the water and hostile voices from the upcoming season surround her. Is this a homage to Dustin Hoffman’s underwater isolation in the 1967 classic The Graduate? Is she drowning in negativity? The undertones of this simple bikini preview are surprisingly dark! Which is funny because the spinoff is set to mark the television debut of the newest Kardashian: little kitten Mercy! The sisters have been seen out and about filming for the new series while bringing the little fuzz ball along. And his cuteness is undeniable. So there you have it: crippling existential despair and kittens. It’s the Kardashian way!