We know what you’re thinking: is Jake Gyllenhaal’s naked butt about to tear his new relationship with Taylor Swift apart? Reportedly Love & Other Drug’s star Gyllenhaal will not be taking his lady love Swift to the movie’s premiere. Allegedly the couple has yet to enter the Bone Zone, and Jake wants to wait before showing Taylor the goods, i.e. ruining all other men for her forever. Aw, that’s so sweet of Jake to be protective of her like that! We didn’t think the movie looked appropriate for children either.
Then again, if we were Taylor, we’d be pissed that everyone in America gets to see our new boyfriend in his glorious, well-tailored birfday suit before we do! A source claims, “Jake is making no secret that he spends most of the film naked. In fact, you get to see so much of Jake in the original cut that the director made a few edits to try and take the focus off Jake’s naked ass and back onto the story.” Is it redundant to buy two tickets for opening night right now? What if we know we are going to need the extra room for all the fainting we’ll be doing?
However, Swift isn’t the only woman getting enraged as the release of Love draws near. At a press junket over the weekend, Jake’s Love & Other Drugs co-star Anne Hathaway unleashed the manicured beast when reporters quested Gyllenhaal about the intense apple-picking he and Swift have been getting in to. “Hang on, hang on. I have to say something,” Hathaway interrupted, “I have been Jake’s on-screen love interest for years. You keep the conversation to me and only me or otherwise I’m going to get nasty! Thank you.” As you may recall, the two starred together in Brokeback Mountain in 2005. We know how you feel, Anne. All the good ones are either gay cowboys or dating Taylor Swift. Or both.
Jake joked aboutÃ‚Â Hathaway’s outburst, sayingÃ‚Â “Don’t get Ella Enchanted pissed off,” to which Anne replied, “Don’t get Ella Enchanted pissed off, and I’m not obedient.” Comparing yourself a six-year-old princess movie to prove your point? Girrrrrrrrrrrl. Jealousy can be an ugly thing.
Movie makers often spend millions on the trailers, commercials and viral videos necessary to get people off their keisters and into a sticky movie theater seat. Jake Gyllenhaal’s Love & Other Drugs, on the other hand, appeals to its base with the strongest, and cheapest, ad campaign we’ve ever seen: the promise of Jake’s naked butt. Let’s break down the campaign point-by-point to show you what we mean:
In the November issue of Esquire with hits newsstands tomorrow, Jake explains, “I was naked a lot in the movie. I was naked in more of it than was even in the final cut. A director’s cut? I don’t even know how that would be rated.” That statement just guaranteed hundreds of millions in DVD sales right there. The movie could be a line-by-line remake of Good Luck Chuck and still at least 50% of the America population will buy a copy to watch in slow motion. And then another copy for when their DVD players burn a hole through the first one.
When asked who was more nervous about the nudity, Jake or co-star Anne Hathaway, Gyllenhaal laughs, “Annie, because as a woman I think it’s harder. She said at one point, ‘Well, we’re both topless and we both show our butts.’ And I was like, ‘Hmm, but it’s a little different for you.'” See, there’s something in this movie for everybody! Don’t care for a naked Gyllenhaal? Might we offer you something in a lovely Hathaway? It’s like a real-life episode of Mad Men over here, and we are furiously entering our credit card info into Fandango to prove it.
This new Love & Other Drugs poster makes us want to do bad, bad things to Jake Gyllenhaal. Well, we’ve always wanted to do bad, bad things to Jake G. but this poster ups the ante on our Gyllenhormones. Is he going to spend the whole movie (un)clothed like that? ‘Cause if he is please lead us to the early line – we’re gonna be camping for tickets.
We also totally love the fact that this movie is based on a memoir called “Hard Sell: The Evolution of a Viagra Salesman” written by Jamie Reidy. ‘Cause that way, when the movie gets too sappy, which it’s going to, it’ll give us a giggle. It’s a twist (isn’t it always) on the boy meet girl-they fall in love plot. Jakey’s a ladykiller pharmaceutical sales dude. Who meets his match in the sexy, loopy Anne Hathaway. They skirt around each other doing the whole “This isn’t serious” dance, until tadah … they realize they’re in love.
Also, before we forget, we’d like to officially make some complaints about this poster. Firstly, get Anne off him and off that bed, stat. That’s supposed to be us. Secondly, WTF is that cushion-duvet hybrid about? Whoever covered him up, do us a favor, and don’t do your job so well.
[Photo via Just Jared]